Maybe a bong isn't the best thing to start off with after reading all of your posts. I seriously think it's hitting you too hard and too fast and you can't handle it right now in your early stage of smoking. Smoke about half a joint or get with some friends and get a good three to four drags off a joint and see how you feel. If you feel mellowed out and possibly a tree in the forest could be your best bud then you my friend are stoned.