One evening this drunk walks into a bar, sits down, and happens to notice a 12" tall man standing on the bar. Astonished, the man asks the guy next to him; "What the hell is that?"
The guy next to him replies "He's a pianist!"
to which the drunk replied "Horse shit, your pulling my leg"
So the guy next to him picks up the 12" man, grabs some books, and props the little man up to the piano. Sure enough, this little man started hammering out all the favorite tunes of the bars' patrons.
Stunned, the drunk asks "That little guy is cool, where the hell did you get him?"
The guy told the drunk how he had found a genie bottle out in the alley, rubbed it until a genie appeared, and was granted one wish. All of a sudden the drunk hauls ass out the back door, finds the bottle, and starts rubbing it: when all of a sudden a genie pops out and grants him one wish.
In a slur, the drunk asks, "I wish for a million bucks". All of a sudden, the sky turns black and overhead a million ducks come flying overhead shitting all over him.
Angrily, the drunk runs back inside, slams the door and begins cursing, "You son of a bitch, I found that genie bottle and wished for a million bucks and all of a sudden there are a million ducks shitting all over my new suit."
The guy started laughing and wildly exclaimed "You don't really think I wished for a 12" pianist do you?"
switch226 Reviewed by switch226 on . Rude jokes only the hilarious ones here :) One day a construction worker left the job a little early, and when he got home he found his wife in bed with another man. Purple with rage, he hauled the man down the stairs and into the garage where he proceeded to secure his dick in a vice. Utterly terrified, the man screamed, "Stop, stop! you're not going to cut it off, are you? ARE YOU?" "Nope," replied the construction worker, "You are...I'm going to set the garage on fire." Rating: 5