haha, that's a great first time story, MJ.... your dad probably did suspect and didnt know quite what to do or say. You may hear about it someday, huh?

for pipes- can you order online if you get it sent somewhere other than your house. You can make one- you got a knife? whittle your own out of wood! I hate smoking out of metal but if you went to Home Depot or Lowes you can get all sorts of metal fittings to piece together an ok pipe.