anyone who understands me....

[BUZz UK]

Slip m8, i don't know the full situation, but leave it. Say to yourself that it was in the past and it's over now. It's no good for anyone to keep dredging up old shit, it's not gonna benefit you in any way. Get a new focus in life and keep movin forward borther.

[stinkyattic]

Slip, you sound like you are craving peace and closure.
We all need that at some point in our lives.
Try to find peace in your own family and in your own heart, and in being the person that you want to be.
Closure may be harder as long as you still wonder what might have been.
But think about it... think about the chances of failure in relationships anyway. Think about how there is a time for things, and when that time is past, you must move on or risk being unable to grow. Think about how long ago that was, and how people change so much over time. Maybe all you need for closure is to finally be able to let go of the past.

Just out of curiosity, have you ever looked into taking a meditation class? It sounds like you are someone who could benefit from learning how to redirect your emotional energy into positive thinking rather than beating yourself up over things that you cannot change.

[BUZz UK]

Slip, you sound like you are craving peace and closure.
We all need that at some point in our lives.
Try to find peace in your own family and in your own heart, and in being the person that you want to be.
Closure may be harder as long as you still wonder what might have been.
But think about it... think about the chances of failure in relationships anyway. Think about how there is a time for things, and when that time is past, you must move on or risk being unable to grow. Think about how long ago that was, and how people change so much over time. Maybe all you need for closure is to finally be able to let go of the past.

Just out of curiosity, have you ever looked into taking a meditation class? It sounds like you are someone who could benefit from learning how to redirect your emotional energy into positive thinking rather than beating yourself up over things that you cannot change.

lol, pretty much what a was trying to say... but moreso.

[Coelho]

Well, slip... maybe im a bit late, anyway...
You said this woman already forgave you. I think its the most important thing.
Now, you need forgive yourself for doing that to her. Maybe thats the hardest part, as if you have some self-harming tendencies, maybe you have some issues against yourself, and therefore cant be kind enough for yourself and forgive yourself.
Anyway, it dont helps to keep re-opening old wounds... i dont want to sound rude or anything, but it seems for me you have some liking for suffering. I wouldnt say its normal, but i know some people just like it. They seems to filtrate only the bad things of the life, and suffer it whole-heartedly.
I would suggest for you to seek a specializated help. Some good psychologist, or counsellor... cause this kind of trouble can happen again in your life, so it would be wise to treat it as soon as you can, for avoid future troubles.

Just out of curiosity, have you ever looked into taking a meditation class? It sounds like you are someone who could benefit from learning how to redirect your emotional energy into positive thinking rather than beating yourself up over things that you cannot change.

Thats a very good idea too... but maybe you should do it after, or togheter with, some psychological treatment... cause sometimes meditation can bring forth things deeply buried, and its not always easy dealing with them...

Anyway, i hope you already is better,
And my best wishes for you! :thumbsup: