when i have a really bad episode with my depression, i get that extreme apathetic feeling, a complete lack of purpose, and i just don't give a shit about ANYTHING. it completely drains my energy and sometimes its so bad that i literally don't have the energy to get up off of my couch, as in i really can barely move because i feel so horrible. when this happens i do everything i can think of to try and cheer myself up...a funny movie, some good music, call friends, drag myself off of the couch and get outside in the sun. there's never one certain thing that always brings me out of it,and sometimes it's really weird things that i would never expect that bring me out of it - for example, when that happened to me the other day, i kept trying to find a way out of that feeling, and the movie 'grease' come on vh1...and for some weird unknown reason, that completely cheered me up right away. i have no fucking clue why, and i actually started laughing once i realized what had happened. maybe it's because i loved it when i was a kid? maybe i just like singing along? no fucking clue...but it worked!

so try anything, and i mean anything, because you never know what will pull you out of it