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07-01-2007, 05:26 AM #1Senior Member
I have the weirdest mental condition in the world
Originally Posted by Coelho
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Well Coehlo, that's quite an optimistic view you have. I think you're probably right, maybe not to the range of having access to foreign knowledge (though who really knows?), but it tears the ego apart and makes me aware of every bit of information and every one of the infinite processes in my brain, all at once. I never could handle the experience even when I tried to embrace it, it's like watching your consciousness and the world all tear apart into a formless, single existence of infinite complexity.
But maybe now that I've studied buddhism considerably more and been practicing meditaiton a lot, I could handle a more extreme perception. It's odd because now that I think of it with an understanding of enlightenment (as far as possible without actually attaining it), it seems a lot like how Buddha described nirvana. Extinction of self, of the illusion of existence, of the barriers that separate you from the rest of reality. Yet while enlightenment is considered a wonderful heavenly state by most, it was like hell to me.
However, I have been smoking plenty of weed which makes this thing go away 100%. I'd have to abstain again and wait about a month before it kicks in again. I just hope I'll have the courage to make something useful of it for once, because let me tell you, I've done many powerful (which I won't name) hallucinogens and none of them could overwhelm me like this.
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On a side note, it was usually triggered by my body getting too hot when I was trying to fall asleep, or already asleep. Now when I get too hot in my sleep I just get incredibly vivid, 100% real, terrifying nightmares. They have no meaning though I assure you, my latest theme has just been being eaten by fast-moving zombies. *shiver*Gandalf_The_Grey Reviewed by Gandalf_The_Grey on . I have the weirdest mental condition in the world I'm not really expecting anybody to be able to answer this, because it's just downright odd. I've studied psychology (moderately) and know plenty, and I've never heard anything about this. BUT, on the odd chance somebody does know what I'm talking about, or maybe experienced it themselves, I'd love to hear about it. So I'm currently 22, and this thing came about when I was 13. The first time happened when I got a fever, and has happened every time I got a fever since. It also happens if Rating: 5\"I think your love of the halfling\'s pipeweed has slowed your mind\"
- Saruman
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