it's dead easy !!
first, return to Germany 1943, tell them your one of the enemy an' more than likely they'll stick you in one of their prisons(stalags) then,get steve mcqueen an' charles bronson to collect potatoes instead of throwing that bloody ball about all day!! ( if they start moaning about 'escape plans an' shit, tell them the war will still be going on AFTER the brew is brewed.) then make a clapping machine, just incase you get sent to colditz ? or a glider or anything you like. just wait till your sober eh?
but don't give any to richard attenbough cause he's already blind. that's the price you pay for all that forging.......oh! an' don't forget to take your own moterbike ,as i'm sure they won't leave one lying around will they?
as simple as.........