Feeling nothing

[Purple Banana]

I know I have MANY days in a month when I simply have no empathy/sympathy for anything... I just feel completely flat and emotionless- not depressed or upset, just completely void of any feeling. I could see a person get hit by a car, and simply not care. I think a lot of it has to do with my Schizo, but the meds can't really help it. And it's odd feeling like this, because before all of this happened, I was a VERY empathetic and caring person- I still am, but there are these type of days. Does that make me a bad person? I can't help but think it does.

Purple Banana Reviewed by Purple Banana on 05-25-2007. Feeling nothing I know I have MANY days in a month when I simply have no empathy/sympathy for anything... I just feel completely flat and emotionless- not depressed or upset, just completely void of any feeling. I could see a person get hit by a car, and simply not care. I think a lot of it has to do with my Schizo, but the meds can't really help it. And it's odd feeling like this, because before all of this happened, I was a VERY empathetic and caring person- I still am, but there are these type of days. Does Rating: 5

[rebgirl420]

I have no empathy for anything myself and my meds are supposed to help too, but alas, they don't. I just kind of go with it and let it run out of my system. I wish I had an answer but I do know what you mean. I dont even mind it anymore.

[Purple Banana]

It comes and goes in stages, I think it might be triggered by a heavy emotional response- the other day, for example, a little girl of about 12 came in with a sponatenous pneumothorax (collapsed lung) and died- I cried for hours...

Today when I think about it, I feel nothing. It's not that I don't care, it's just I have apathetic feelings about it.

[rebgirl420]

Sounds like your mind is putting up walls so you dont have to deal with all the sadness. Its a defense mechanism.

[mrdevious]

I personally have abnormally high empathy. Not to be mistaken with sympathy, but when I see anybody suffering, even slightly, I feel it 100% too and want to help them.

But you know what, that doesn't make me any more or less a "good" person than you PurpleBanana. Empathy is just a part of the brain that developes as you age, and maybe schizophrenia has a tendency to suppress it. Either way, isn't not whether or not you have empathy that determines your worth as a moral person, it's what you do with your mindset to affect those around you, that really counts.

There are, BTW, certain buddhist meditation techniques that are used to help develope empathy and diminish the mental barriers that separate you from other conscious entities. Meditation literally means "the art of focus", and when you learn to clear the mind and focus strongly on one aspect (ie. empathy) of the mind until you are settled in and naturally placed in that zone, you strengthen that part of the brain immensely.

[Bodom Children Of]

i feel like that all the time. I hope for gore. Haven't you learned life is only death. No it doesn't make you a bad person, there's no hope left for mankind.

[PureEvil760]

3 words: stop taking meds

[Purple Banana]

I don't think it's a defense mechanism, it happens a lot per month, regardless of whether or not something sad happens.

And if I stopped taking my meds, I think it'd be much worse, Evil.

Don't get me wrong- most days in a month, I am filled to the brim with happiness- it's just days like today when I'm flat. I heard a few more voices, and saw a few more things than usual today, so maybe it's a flareup.

[mrdevious]

Sounds like a seratonin plummet actually.

[PureEvil760]

i was diagnosed with schizophrenia a long time ago and now realize that it was a false diagnoses and the aderall or whatever it was called made me feel like shit.