But see, cannabis is the only thing that helps, other than valium. When I'm high, I'm perfectly fine, unless it gets ruined by my family situation. Lately I've been getting Lavender Kush, Levi, and Juicy. They are all dank. They seem to help my anxiety more than the sativa-dominant sinsemilla I had previously been getting.

Unfortunately, a large part of my anxiety is about people trying to ruin my life, because of my cannabis lifestyle. Also, unfortunately, it's not a paranoid delusion, as, if anyone's followed the link I provided, they would find out that I had to destroy 3 confirmed females in their 2nd week of flowering. Those plants meant everything to me, and honestly gave my life purpose. They depended on me to water them, to feed them, and to give them light. Before that, I had no responsibilities or anything to be proud of.

To try and compensate for my loss, I purchased some vegetables to grow in my grow-room, but it's still just not the same, as cannabis is what I feel I was put on the earth to help, and I've dedicated my life to the cultivation, use, education, and pro-legislation to cannabis.

If it weren't for my lifestyle, I could simply call the police when he is being an abusive asshole, and have him hauled away, without any fear of someone trying to turn the tables on me.