Yeah, the rock-star-employed chefs I've heard about and seen featured are part of the bus tour. They almost have their own bus to haul around the kitchen and stuff. They shop locally and then fix what they can. It'd be too expensive to haul all that equipment along on planes, I guess.

Someday I think you're going to find your life's "wings" and fly happily and securely. I mean that metaphorically instead of literally. I know it can be done. You just didn't get a solid enough foundation to realize it yourself. Not yet, at least! Whether or not you'll ever feel secure on a real plane is another thing. I have two friends who literally cannot fly, at least not without practically being anesthetized. That's a common fear, and I know modern behavioral/psychological theory believes in forcing people to conquer those fears by facing them, but that's very hard in reality. My heart goes out to you!