Venting in progress!

[RESiNATE]

Ok, so here's the deal:

I have not worked consistently for some time (lucky to get 3days work a week), and as such, I find myself in a state of financial hardship.
I went to the bank yesterday, and managed to secure an overdraft extension. Basically, this will enable me to pay my rent, get some food, and fill my car with petrol. I will have very little left over to buy my kids a christmas present - this makes me feel very sad

I got a text from my ex-wife today, saying that she will get some presents for the kids on my behalf.

Now, this is typical of her - she sticks her nose in where it isn't wanted, and makes sure that she gets a few digs into me whilst she's at it.

I told her that I didn't want her to get anything 'on my behalf', as the problem is mine - aside from the fact that she was extremely derrogatory about my current situation!
She always pokes her nose in, and it really pisses me off - she seems to try to find ways of telling me that I am a failure, and that I don't care that the kids won't have anything from me this year (well, not until I've got a new job sorted).
FFS!!
She thenb rings me up, and TELLS me that she's got some things, and made a point of telling me that it all cost £65...and practically demanded that I take them!
She said:"I'm not sending the kids to yours if they haven't got anything under the tree from you!"
WTF!
I said that I'm just as willing for the kids to learn that sometimes they can't have everything that they want - to which she replied that I was being horrible and mean, when she has 'so graciously' 'done me a favour'!!!

I mean, FFS, I don't feel too proud of the fact that I am skint, but by the same token I want to bring the kids up to realise that sometimes life is tough. I think it would give them a sense of appreciation for the times when life is good!

She is always interfering in my life, telling me what I should do and how to live - fuck her the fuck up

You know, and she doesn't even be nice about it - there is always a caustic remark, a put-down, and a distainful comment, like, "I'm doing this for the kids, not you!"....that's after she has told me that she's 'doing me a favour'!

I fucking hate christmas!!
Bah fucking humbug!


Rant over

RESiNATE Reviewed by RESiNATE on 12-22-2004. Venting in progress! Ok, so here's the deal: I have not worked consistently for some time (lucky to get 3days work a week), and as such, I find myself in a state of financial hardship. I went to the bank yesterday, and managed to secure an overdraft extension. Basically, this will enable me to pay my rent, get some food, and fill my car with petrol. I will have very little left over to buy my kids a christmas present - this makes me feel very sad :( I got a text from my ex-wife today, saying that she will Rating: 5

[maryjanemama]

I've been accused of being a Scrooge in the past, Res. You're ex is a sea hag in tight pants. The buying of presents business is completely out of control. Children know love and they can tell the difference between presents under the tree and who really cares for them. You have every right to see them, no matter what. Tell her to take the gifts she bought "on your behalf", return them, and buy herself a muzzle.

[RESiNATE]

lol,MJM..yeah, I don't know that there is a muzzle big enough!

It's always the same with her...she seems to think that a certain amount must be spent - £200!!! - and isn't happy unless she has spent that amount.
Commercialism has destroyed the 'spirit' of christmas - I'm not talking about the religious side of things, I'm talking about the family get-to-together, the sharing of company and goodwill. Nowadays, it seems that people go into some kind of mental insanity, and have to spend thousands of money.
Why?

Sure, I wanna give my kids presents, they have both been good at school and (when they're with me, at least) are showing out to be good kids...but I DO resent the fact that, just because I can't match her 'generosity', she sees me as being a crap dad!

I mean, she's aready fucked me over by shagging my mate, fucked me over by running up loads of credit card debt (a contributary factor to my current financial predicament), spent our entire marriage by slagging me off and treating me like shit...now she waves her new boyfriend in my face and tells me that I'm not living up to my responsibilities as a father!

AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHhh..I am soooo fucking mad right now!!!!!

[RESiNATE]

FFS!!

I just got another text from the bitch, saying that she's told the kids that Santa won't be going to my house, and that he is going to bring all the stuff to hers!!

What kind of a mother does that?

She's lucky that I can restrain myself from lowering myself to her level!

[psychocat]

I know a man with a 45 , any help???

Only jokin man but I understand .

[RESiNATE]

Tempting, psychocat...very tempting lol

[RESiNATE]

You know, it's a bit like being woken up one day, and being told...
"Remember how you were saying that we couldn't afford a holiday? Well, I kinda ignored everything that we discussed and booked a £600 holiday on the credit card...I hope you don't mind."

Oh...wait a minute....that rings a bell!!!

Oh yeah, of course...that is exactly what DID happen.
Kinda like, "What do you think?....yeah?..well, I'm gonna do what the fuck I like anyway!"

Fancy telling the kids that Santa aint coming to my house...WTF!
Is it me, or is that just plain twisted?

I've told her to not talk to me, for fear that I might say something that I regret!
And yet she sends another text, saying that basically I am a waste of space and that I am shirking on my responsibilities as a father!

And damning me in front of the kids is being responsible???

I've never done that to her, despite what I think of her - I've never bad-mouthed her to the kids, and never would....
She, it seems, is not so gracious as she is trying to make out!

Fucking fuck bollocks

Res the unhappy bunny

[Lulu]

Res she sounds like a complete trollop and a nasty, petty wagon. You're a good Dad, don't let her make you feel bad. Ignore everything she says, talk to the kids yourself and explain stuff as best you can. You're good with words and you'll make a wonderful Christmas for yourself and your children with or without the spondulicks.

Lulu xx

[RESiNATE]

Thanks for the comfort, Lulu

Sorry to bleat on about it, but if I don't release the pressure by typing it out, then I'll just end up festering on the sofa feeling sorry for myself
But also, I guess, it kinda gives peeps an insight into why I get so dark - the patheticness of some people, being one of them!

It just doesn't help, when I have to endure the bitch's constant need to slag me off in some way - like, we're not married anymore, ffs! (well, actually, legally we are - I can't afford the divorce proceedings lmfaoo...irony at it's best!).

She took some relish in telling me that the kids 'seemed very disappointed' when she told them that 'Father Christmas wouldn't be going to daddy's house'...

Luckily, I have already been honest with the boys, and explained the money situation to them (as best as one can to a 6 & 4 yr old lol) - but I was already going to handle the Santa issue...cuh!
Now I gotta face the kids' interrogation about what their mother told them!

blah blah blah

[The C]

Hey Res.

It's not really my buisinsess. But I would try to fill the kids up with values at this time. Make drinking the eggnog a special event. Go to the skateing rink, build snow people. Throw good values and im sure your kids will appreciate that just as much as anything. It seems the last thing they need is exactly 200 pounds in shit.

I'm not sure, i would even consider buying her a gift, to show her that her financial help is not welcome. Think of something from the heart thats meaning full. M.J had a good idea with the muzzle, try involving that.

I really don't know, thats just what I would do. Mabe not involve the muzzle though. She has been rude to you. It depends on the relationship really suppose.