^wow thats pretty dark, dude. I listen to heavy metal if I'm pissed, Cannibal Corpse, Suffocation, Decapitated, Soilent Green, Misery Index, etc. But in times of deep depression, I say the best suggestion is to get stoned and go out for a walk, try to discover something amazing, go back to being a kid again. Hope you feel better soon, dude.