Trouble In The Hen House

[napolitana869]

I think it sounds like there are bigger problems that she isnt telling you and she's using the weed as an excuse to complain about something because she can't complain about whats really bothering her. It's possible that she doesnt know whats really bothering her but she knows that something isn't right. It sounds like she could benefit from individual counseling, and that you both could benefit from some type of relationship counseling to learn how to communicate better.

napolitana869 Reviewed by napolitana869 on 04-23-2007. Trouble In The Hen House I'm not really one to post personal stuff on a web site and ask for help, But considering the situation and the subject this site seems liek a convienent place to do so. My Gf of a year and a half Living together for a year. Has come to me in frantic times, and said she doesn't wanna smoke anymore. We both smoke everyday frequently. She sayds she doesn't wanna laze around and she honestly feels its ruining her life. I say fine thats cool, I will do what I can to help you with the situation. Rating: 5

[kdspecial]

I think it sounds like there are bigger problems that she isnt telling you and she's using the weed as an excuse to complain about something because she can't complain about whats really bothering her. It's possible that she doesnt know whats really bothering her but she knows that something isn't right. It sounds like she could benefit from individual counseling, and that you both could benefit from some type of relationship counseling to learn how to communicate better.

Yes your pretty bang on about that one.

I myself have been to consoling before and know how much one can benifit from it.

With her its hard for her to even accept help from me. I mean I don't wanna list examples but there have been numerous times She has needed my help in many cases but will not ask, Or will ask and when I offer she gets offened.

She has done everything herself her whole life and its made her a stong person but there is nothing wrong with asking for help. I do it all the time.

im considering with all thats going (I mean im not sure what will happen tonight) If we do have any chance in resolving this Consoling should be on our TO DO List..

Loads to think about....

kd

[stinkyattic]

Last time I stood up and was like fuk this Its not going down like this. She ran away. I pointed out some obious things that were wrong, I got slapped, A beer thrown at me and I was punched in the face. I kinda laughed it off hurting laugh though. But I was ready to lose it. My closet door paid the price. She left threating to leave saying shes not comming back (I said dont ever threaten to leave me thats childish. Espically for somone who tells you they want to marry you.) and later she came back we made up but didn't actully resolve anything. Because todays problem is still here..
kd

You should have told her, fine, get out.
Think if you had slapped her and thrown a beer at her... and PUNCHED her in the face? WTF!
She shouldn't threaten to leave... she should just scrape together some dignity and DO it.
Because you have every right to throw her ass out. If she is already being violent with you because she doesn't know how to communicate, just imagine how she is going to deal with oh, say, disciplining your children when you have a family?!
Yeah.
Not cool.

[kdspecial]

ahh yeah,,,,,,

She felt pretty bad about that one... I said listen I understand you get angry and I know why you get so angry. I UNderstand YOU is what I said,, I think that made her more mad.. Its really just the truth. Somtimes the truth is hard for some to handle.

Ok guys and Gals I be back ina few hours I gotta do a Voice record,,

Thansk for the support guys and Gals Its really clearing my head up a bit,.

kd

[stinkyattic]

Back to work slacker!

[napolitana869]

You should have told her, fine, get out.
Think if you had slapped her and thrown a beer at her... and PUNCHED her in the face? WTF!
She shouldn't threaten to leave... she should just scrape together some dignity and DO it.
Because you have every right to throw her ass out. If she is already being violent with you because she doesn't know how to communicate, just imagine how she is going to deal with oh, say, disciplining your children when you have a family?!
Yeah.
Not cool.

thats a really good point. If she cant express her feelings to an adult, how will she be able to deal with a child?

[kdspecial]

Yeah I'm not sure what I'm gonna do.

Im really curious to see if she is gonna say anything or wait untill I say somthing. I am a great BF I rub her back everynight before Bed. Even when Im not going to Bed right that minute. I've always tried to do so much for US.. I think I've really not got too many choices...

Ither I accept it how it is and hope for cahnges and make some of my own as well. Or I get the fuk off the bumpy ass road.

kd

[stinkyattic]

Ither I accept it how it is and hope for cahnges and make some of my own as well.

Hm. Welcome to my world, bro.
Here's me over the last few years trying to rationalize staying with various loser exes:
"Oh he's still got some growing up to do"
"He's a good person, he just doesn't believe in himself yet"
"As soon as he has some stability in his life [provided by yours truly] it will be easier for him to become a better person"
... insert other dumb chick rationalization here... mostly of the 'I can change my man' genre....

Or I get the fuk off the bumpy ass road.

Bumpy ass? You mean... *GASP* Cellulite? There's moisturizers for that shit. hahaha

Here's a picture of what relationships can turn into if you aren't careful:
:beatdeadhorse:

[kdspecial]

yeah With Me I never count somone out... I don't like to Doubt people and I hate doubting myself. But this is becomming pretty constant. I have made more stability, I have done extra things outside the BF boundry for the better of HEr hopfing it will rub off on our relationship But there comes a time where you gotta say....

I don't deserve that./.. I would never treat somone like that.,So why am I allowing it to me.

You make too many good points Stinky... As well as the others.. I'm a wicked listener so I will listen tonight and go from there.. I have a feeling it wont be hard to hear.

thanks for all the support From all of you..

kd

[stinkyattic]

You're a sweetie and you need some sweetness back. Good luck.