Yes.

But also, sometimes I wonder if I am god, and that I am stuck in a game that I put myself in, and when I die, I'll be back in the staging room with my god-minions, laughing about the game. "I cant believe your guy masterbated so much this time!"

Then sometimes I wonder if this is all a test and that everybody is really one consciousness plotting against me. Like it's a big movie and everyone is playing their part against me. At the end, all the players come out for a curtain call.

In other words, sometimes I think, It might JUST be me

"Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. " - Bill Hicks


I feel you on the loving thing. People are crazy assholes. So much pain. Thats why I hope its all not real. The suffering is just an act to make you play the game correctly, so you are vested in it.