I'm truly sorry for your loss. You emphasize your pain when you said, "waiting for ashton kutcher to hop out of my closet telling me that i just got punkd." Stay strong, take a day off and just reflect on the good times, man. The world seems mean when your thoughts are tender. It's not a joke, as much as you would like it to be, you must accept the reality--only then can you begin to move on.

Thanks for sharing.