I'm gonna try to work this through with you. First off, is she on birth control? Because it lowers sex drive substantially in a lot of women. If she is, she should try switching to something like NuvaRing, which is supposed to affect sex-drive less. Second, could her drinking be affecting her sex drive? Like the female equivalent of whisky-dick? Third, you should be using lots of lube during sex if you aren't already- that will make up for her dryness. Fourth, are you having the kind of sex she wants to have? I don't suggest this all the time in a relationship, but if you are trying to kick up her sex-drive I would suggest doing things her way for a bit. For example, try doing oral on her and then not asking for anything in return (no sex, nada).

As for the jealousy and her drunk-flirting bit, I can totally relate. Most of my friends are male, and when I'm at a party I go and hug ALL of them- even those I don't know very well. My bf is the same when he is drunk, he is super flirty but doesn't even realize he's doing it. I think you just need to relax a bit...there's no need punishing her before she even does anything wrong. If she were to cheat on you, she could pull the excuse "well you are jealous and controlling"...then what? You just need to chill and trust her, not all women are the same.

Have you had an in-depth conversation with her about how you feel about no sex? When you say "I would like more sex", is her response simply "Well I don't feel like having it anymore"? I can see why she wouldn't want to have it if it hurts her, but if you can fix that, she needs to do her part and make you happy too. You have needs too. The average for an old couple is once per week. At your age, it should be at least that. Talk to you later