My heart goes out to you. I understand how hard that it is breaking up with someone you care about.

But it is better now, than marrying her and having those feelings of hostility build up over the years.

There is nothing I can say to make you feel better. Time is the only thing that will do that.

When I divorced my ex after ten years it was downright hostile. To have someone betray you after being what you consider your best friend turns your world upside down.

You know your relationship was not healthy. I would just hold on to that and realize although it is hard, you made the right decision.