Just wondering about all you parents out there.
Is it worth it in the end to raise a child/children?
I've asked many about the highlight of their lives and parents
always tend to say it was the birth of their children.
Whats your take?
:o
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Just wondering about all you parents out there.
Is it worth it in the end to raise a child/children?
I've asked many about the highlight of their lives and parents
always tend to say it was the birth of their children.
Whats your take?
:o
to have a child is to give up your own live just to have em use all your money time and effort
id guess no.. maybe i shud try it..
yes it is,im a single dad of 4, 16 14 13 10 and its the most rewarding thing you can do,i fucking love bringing my kids up on my own :D :D
OMG are you for real? Is that what you really think or are you just looking for attention? To have a child is to give life, the highest honor that a person can achieve on this planet! You think growing weed is awesome? Sure, a marijuana plant has it's rewards but those rewards DULL in comparison to the extreme love that children bring. You never truly love unconditionally until you have children. Not your husband/wife, not your family. For example, you only love your spouse under conditions, but children, well, if you are even slightly human, you love them forever no matter what the conditions! To this day I don't understand why someone would want to miss out on that, but hey, to each their own! Peace!Quote:
Originally Posted by b0Ng h!tz 4 mE
fucking right u hit the nail right on the head:D
I rather live my life without getting woken up by screaming or having some fucker there always asking me to buy them things with my money
as you said, to each they're own.. but no, i dont see the point in having a kid tbh
i can't answer your poll lol.. i'm inbetween two answers... it definately is worth having one.... and i'm more inclined to answer the first response... but.. i would have liked to waited til maybe we were a bit better off financially, back then, we were basicly just all around fucked financially, we're actually doing aLOT better now.. it can be really traumatic worrying whether or not you are going to be able to afford your babies needs... in the begining when things were bad.. i'd often go hungry, just to make sure my wife had food to help produce breast milk and so that the baby would have what he needed... when we got on food stamps it was a sigh of relief.... a huge one..
but i'm glad we had this child.. i mean if it had been later on... there's virtually no chance he'd be the same child and i've grown quite attatched to this one :) i'm sure i woulda loved any child we had just the same tho... i guess, just don't plan to have a baby (like actually TRY and have one) until you're financially stable (and believe me, raising a child isn't cheap lol) use all your government funded help you can... medicare, food stamps, wic... every little bit helps... but it's not very good to have to depend on it... cuz that shit can be cut at any time... and if you are completely dependant upon it.... well you'll be in a bad bad situation if that happens...
I can't wait to have kids and see my family continue to grow larger and stronger. Family is the most important thing to me in my life. I would give up cannabis in a heart beat for my family.
Not sure I agree with loving kids more than a spouse though. The relationship you have with your spouse is of immense importance. You spend the REST of your life with your spouse, the time you spent with your kids is relatively short (although obviously of extreme importance).
lol... because my wife had post partum (sp?) depression after having the baby, i ended up being the one to raise him for about 3 months straight (for about a month before that, we had a schedule... she would take 12 hours and i'd take 12 hours) man it was hell... i did it, and would of never thought to stop doing it... but i'm not going to lie, i fucking hated it... waking up every 3 hours to feed/change him my schedule basicly went: go to sleep, get woke up in a couple of hours, feed him/change him.. put him in his swing/crib try and finish sleeping, maybe fall asleep an hour later so i get at most another 2 hours of sleep, repeat that last part again, but this time when i get woke up i'd be up for the day... i'd lay him on my chest and watch tv, or hold him in my arms so he can watch too... after awhile put him in his swing.. keep him entertained... til i get completely worn out (there was no getting tired i was ALWAYS tired, and i mean like the tired you'd get after working a 12 hour shit where you're on your feet all day) and then start from the begining all over again.Quote:
Originally Posted by b0Ng h!tz 4 mE
i'm just glad as all kinds of hell those days are over... now is the begining of the good days... where he's learning to talk, and play around, and discovering the world around him... it's amazing to sit there and watch what he can/does do...i know i say it all the time... but i just don't ever feel i get the significance of what i'm trying to say across... it's something you'd just have to go through yourself to understand how it makes you feel in side to sit there and watch him play with his toys (like one where you have to match up the shaped blocks with the holes in the 'base' or his little xylaphone (sp?)) or flip a light switch over and over, or climb up on the chairs/cough, or feed himself, or turn our light switch which is a dimmer switch, or sit there playing with the buttons on the tv, turning it up and down, changing the channel turning it off and on... and the smiles he gets, and the things he says (they're not real words, or some are, but he can't quite say them right yet) and his laughs.... man.. everytime i see him i hear this part of dave chapelle's for what it's worth (stand up comedy) "this is fucking crazy.... you used to live in my balls man!"
Hey PatrickHenry, what I meant was that you'll love your wife only as long as she respects you and loves you or as long as she's not cheating on you continuously, ad etc...but your children might put you through hell and there you'd be, still loving them. Peace
It's wonderfully insightful to get such advice from an experienced parent.Quote:
Originally Posted by b0Ng h!tz 4 mE
stick it in a microwave or cut off it's arms, or any of that sick shit, for that matter.Quote:
Originally Posted by HiProGlow
lol.. not many people spend their entire life with their spouse anymore (and i'm not talking entire life like from birth, just from when you married them) i think something like 30% of people get divorced in their first year of marriage.... and a very high number of all marriages end in divorce eventually.... hiproglow has a point... the love you have for your child is unconditional, they can grow up to be the worst kids ever.. do the most fucked up things to you, or to other people.. and you may even get extremely angry at them and never talk to them or decide to have nothing more to do with them.. but you will still always deeply deeply love them...Quote:
Originally Posted by PatrickHenry
Quote:
Originally Posted by slipknotpsycho
Here in Maine we had someone cook their baby in an oven, in a turkey baster! Sick, sick shit! Peace!
I agree with you guys, I just wish people would focus more on their relationships with their spouses. It makes me sad to see so many failed relationships where the kids take the brunt of the pain.
Having two parents who love each other and treat each other with respect and affection is the greatest gift parents can give to their children. I know circumstances such as being a widow or widower make that impossible at times, but kids truly do benefit from that solid, loving partnership foundation in ways we can hardly fathom.
Is having kids worth it? For me, yes. But I love kids and always knew I wanted them even though I only ended up having one. I don't think parenting is something that everyone ought to do, and frankly I wish more people waited till they were older, calmer and better educated befiore they had kids. It is a life-altering experience, and not always in only good ways. It's a huge adjustment to get accustomed to living your life for someone else, and that's what you have to do when you have small children, basically. They become the driving priority. If you're not ready to let that happen, you're not ready for kids.
with the current world population, I don't really see the point of giving birth to a child. If you really want to give, how about adopting children already born without parents?
Right now I'm far too selfish to give up on myself and have children; and I don't see that changing anytime soon, unfortunately.
haha.. sorry but i believe that im aloud to have an opinion on this subject to.. not my fault if you dont understand what point im trying to get across but hey, thats not my problemQuote:
Originally Posted by greendove
i've seen plenty of shit to know why i choose this kind of thing, iv seen plenty of ungreatfull parents who just raise they're children to be depressed and assholes, i know plenty of people who's dad or mum ran away cuz they couldnt cope with all the stress of raising kids, and i have enough experience on the matter to know that some people just arnt cut out for the job.
So excuse me if you dont agree on what i have to say but if you dont like what i have to say it dosnt mean you have to be a sarcastic smartass about it.. just because iv never HAD a kid dosnt mean i dont know shit about it
. . . But the question was directed at parents, little boy.
You feel so compelled to make an ass of yourself, and that really is *your* problem.
Just show a little class next time fella. ~
Learn to read.. I dont care if it was directed at the parents, i still wanted to let people know my opinon on the matter, OBVOIUSLY all of the parents on this forum are gonna say its something not to miss, and what kinda thread would THAT be if everyone just said the exact same thing?Quote:
Originally Posted by Its a Plant
i dunno wether you made the "little boy" comment wether to get a reaction out of me or as a retarded attempt to make me feel small.. but all that means is im gonna still be alive when your buried six feet underground getting eaten by maggots ;)
Didn't I though ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by b0Ng h!tz 4 mE
And I'm glad you've stated your opinion, now be prepared to defend it to the death!
. . kidding . .
P.S. - - I love children.
P.P.S. - - that "love" is purely platonic, just to clarify. =)
you had me worried for a secondQuote:
Originally Posted by Its a Plant
People who want children should have them, either through birth or adoption. I can't wait to have my kids! But many people aren't ready to have children, but do, and of course the children suffer greatly. I think that most people should wait until they are a bit older (30ish) so that they have the experience of living for themselves first and figuring out who they really are before adding a child who must be cared for night and day. Because there is no safe, foolproof birth control (human error must always be factored into the equation) young people who haven't had this yet feel saddled with too much responsibilty and resent the loss the child represents. Not a recipe for happiness! There was a time when having children very young made sense- because people died in their thirties, and many women younger did as well in childbirth. But in contemporary society, I believe it is best in most cases to wait. So if a young person says they don't want kids, I personally am relieved! If I had a child when I was in my teens or twenties, I would have been a terrible parent. Many years later, I now think I will be a good one. Times change and so do we.
I'm assuming you're a good Dad and nice to your kids, if so you're a fucking ace guy. Well done.Quote:
Originally Posted by xxxhazexxx
im 27yrs old and currently have two boys 8 and 1 and another on the way, i wont lie i wanted to jump out the window some days but teaching them how to learn things its a wonderful experience.
its tough, im broke, but im happy :)
I'd like to thank you all for your input,
and hope that any parents joining this forum vote and share their input on this thread.
Thanks guys :)
Yep, you are 100% correct...well....maybe 95% correct. They don't use up all the money . But yeah, you do give up your old life. But the new life you start, that of a parent, is infinitely more rewarding. Which brings me to my next point:Quote:
Originally Posted by b0Ng h!tz 4 mE
Yes it does, you don't know shit about it. Neither did I before I became a parent, neither did slipknot, neither did xxxhazexxx, neither did..... You may have seen what other parents do, you may have seen or played with, or suffered because of, other people's kids. But, you do not know what it means to be a parent until you've actually become one.Quote:
Originally Posted by b0Ng h!tz 4 mE
The relationship between a parent and a child, the bond between you, the feelings you have for a child, are so different from anything else you could ever experience that you really can't know until you've had a child of your own. It really hit me a year or so ago when my daugher had the stomach flu. I'm holding her in my arms as she's crying and throwing up all over me. The thing was, I didn't even think about the fact that I was getting covered in her vomit. The only thing that mattered was that my little girl didn't feel good. It's things like that that you just can't truly know about until it's your own child.
I will give you credit where credit is due. You sound like you are smart enough to know you are not ready for a child. That's not a bad thing. Heck, I wasn't ready until I was 33. I've seen too many people who have kids long before they're ready. These are the assholes, you mentioned earlier, that run out on their kids because they can't handle the stress.
As for me, there's about 5hrs and 20 minutes more hours before I get home and see my little girl again. Yes, I'm counting the minutes.................:D
I haven't reached "the end" as I'm not dead. However, these last 5 (almosst 5.5) years have been well worth it. I love my children.