anybody been in a long distance relationship before?

im in a pickle. a girl ive known for something like 4 yrs(never talked much at first), finally really started hanging out together almost a year ago, when i met her best friend and was involved with her slightly(no sex, she almost always had a bf...never was worth it). ive always known her as a nice person, but one night a group of us rolled in june, and i talked with her like the entire night.

she's great. funny, pretty, intelligent and not ditsy, composed. of course theres always a catch....she moved to california a few months ago. she's been back twice, and her friend bought her a place ticket(friggin $400) to bring her back the 27-jan 8th. our feelings our mutual.

now, some of our friends that ive been hanging out with, theres always discussion about me and her and whats going on. i got her a present she'll love for sentimental value, and a zep shirt to go with it. tonight, one guy said "you know whats gonna happen.....you all are gonna start dating"

now, as nice as it'd be. i dunno how well it will work, if it will be worth it, and i dont think it will for the longterm. anybody have any advice/experience to share? if your answers gonna be like "just fuck her when she comes back", dont bother replying then, not interested in that shit.

hey yoda ,
how far from cali are you from her ?
i was in the same boat at a young age but we were only a cpl. hrs. apart . but she ended up mrs. crispi anyways man , thru thick n thin , n we been thru hell man , literally . ya never know .

ps . thanx for rep. yoda , means alot man .
peace
your cuz
crispi

When I first knew and fell in love with my husband, it was long-distance. He lived in Dallas and I lived in Austin, which is nearly 4 hours away. If you want to, you can make stuff like that work by getting together every chance you get--and by staying in touch by phone and computer. In some ways, all the talking and communicating remotely allow you to get to know each other better. In your case, Yoda, it's not like you know yet that this needs to go in a long-term direction, right? So why not let yourself see where it might lead and try and keep open to the possibility before ruling it out because "I don't think it'll work"? These days with PCs and IM capabilities what they are, it's not difficult to stay in touch. And there are always highways and airplanes to bring people together in person.

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Originally Posted by birdgirl73

In some ways, all the talking and communicating remotely allow you to get to know each other better.
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This is the coolest thing about distance... the sex thing is out, no weird complications from that, and you really get to care for the person solely based on their words. Very cool. Worthwhile IMO.

i've been in a few long distance. From one hour to across the globe (thank you army for ending that hellish relationship) They can work if both parties want them to work out.

Or you can always fuck her when she gets back

sorry i had to.

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Originally Posted by Skrappie

i've been in a few long distance. From one hour to across the globe (thank you army for ending that hellish relationship) They can work if both parties want them to work out.

Or you can always fuck her when she gets back

sorry i had to.

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lol skrappie thats acceptable, you gave a serious answer first.

xcrispi, you truly are an inspiration. toke on man!

birdgirl, yeah using IM is our way of talking, occassional phone call. thing is, i live in maryland, completely different coast. im not too worried about long term, i dont ever think in terms like that, its the short term i wanna know if it will be worth it, cause if it is, then it becomes long term(crawl before you walk, ya know?).

i figure if things work out nicely, then i would cut back on smoking to save money, so like every other month i could save a chunk of $$$$ to get the majority of her ticket to come back(or shit i wanna go to cali).

why not give it a chance. if it doesnt work out then thats they way things were meant to be.

can't say i've ever been in a long distance relationship, long distance crushes yeah... but theres not really much advice i can give you.. except to go for it, dont miss a chance and look back later thinking what could've been, you will regret it.

p.s. have a good birthday napolitana869 ;)

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birdgirl, yeah using IM is our way of talking, occassional phone call. thing is, i live in maryland, completely different coast. im not too worried about long term, i dont ever think in terms like that, its the short term i wanna know if it will be worth it, cause if it is, then it becomes long term(crawl before you walk, ya know?).

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have you considered internet phone calls, to cut the costs? Although IM's are a little more convient. When i was across the globe Email was my main mode of communication, although I was not faithful in that relationship, it wouldnt have lasted because deep down neither of us wanted it to. I had another simular one where i screwed up. To be honest yoda i usually see long distance as an easy way out. you have the potential pain; but if you want to go for it, might end up being an adventure, or even love.

the balls in your court green one.

i think a long distance relationship will work as long as both parties are committed to each other. if you both REALLY like each other, you both will be really excited to make it work- and i am sure it will.

i found myself in a long-distance kinda thing about 4 years ago... i really liked the guy but he ended up cheating on me. we weren't "techinically" dating, but i still call it cheating due to the circumstances, which i won't go into now. anyways, like i said- as long as both of you want it, im sure you can make it work.

well perhaps ill have an answer for you all when she comes back down

cool- good luck with whatever happens.

im sorry, but this sounds like ur going through the pain i have gone through way too many times, either that or im just wrong, here are the couple things i think:

1. ur in the friend zone, u guys r best friends, u dont think of it that way, but she does.... aka nothings happening, u wasted ur money on that shirt and time on that gift

2. id say fuck her when she gets here but i know thats not as easy as it sounds

ok now here im going to ramble on, prob say some harsh things, if u dont read this part o well w/e, these questions/comments/ur feedback will help me analyze the situation and help me figure out what you should do

have u ever had a gf?
if so how many?
how long?
wud u guys do?

u seem like a down to earth good kid, that neever works, girls like those guys as friends (me and maybe you) a lot of the time the girls u(any nice guy) like only like fucking dick shits

um theres a shit ton of other stuff but i got side tracked and im not smoking right now so i dont remember what those things were forget my post

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Originally Posted by aznson01

have u ever had a gf?
if so how many?
how long?
wud u guys do?

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the rest of your post was shit, but i will reply that no we arent best friends. i have had a gf(i would not make my first someone who doesnt live here). how many? fuck if i know, in terms of long term basically none, longest was 4 months. with her, never done anything cept slap her ass and hold her hand when we saw borat last time she was here.

known her for 4 years, just friends with the same group, but we barely spoke to each other. just recently, like not even a year yet. ive gotten enough hints that she wants a relationship, but same situation as me, not sure if she wants the long term deal. she is thinking of moving back here with her best friend in the summer though.