i tried, i cried, and died (a little) :sadcrying:

:sadcrying:

ok, first, i find out that my little dog who just had puppies has pnuemonia. we tooke her to the vet on sat...she died overnite... we buried her sunday eve.

today, i find one of my big dogs dead in the yard. he's 13 years old, we knew he was gonna go this year, but it's too late to bury him tonite. so my brother and i are taking shifts, keeping our other dogs from chewing on him...

i come inside and my brother tells me there's a fire in my room.... we run to the bedroom and find it filled with smoke to the point that you can't see in there at all.

well, it was just the ballast shorting. however, i have no hps now, my plants are wilted and dead looking, as are my clones and moms....

can someone please shoot me? i'm scared of guns or i'd do it myself. it's days like these that make me want to take all of my pills at the same time...

sorry guys, but i'm crying right now, i've no one to talk to, my babies are dead, and i think my plants are too...

i'm gonna go cry some more.

i'll never question god again, taking this shit off my signature...

I am so sorry. Pet's are like family. As far as your grow that sucks and all but you are lucky it did not burn your home down.

You will grow again. I wish I could do something to make you feel better. But I know I would be crushed if my cats died.

I have also lost an entire grow. It sucks but I know you will grow more later.
I bet you can save most of this one.

all that were in the flowerbox are getting harvested regardless. they aren't ready, but oh well. man this realy sux. i have to stop the grow, i destroyed my other lights unplugging the timing device, i broke branches, basically my entire op is gone. the only thing left is the seed room.

so, any body want some beans?

My heart goes out to you. So very sad to lose loved ones. Just remember there's got to be meaning somewhere in all that loss. Take care and keep your head up! Peace.

here's how i see it...

god: kp, you've realy pissed me off this time...

kp: so, i've asked you for guidance and you ignore me...

god: i'm tired of you, you want to play rough?

and then... the mighty smote...



yep, i'm a kenite, doomed to damnation, why should i even try? it's always going to be like this. if karma is real then reicarnation is too, because i've done nothing to deserve this. i must have been a realy fucked up individual in a former life...

KindPrincess: Do you really think god did this?

Pets die and it breaks our hearts.

Lights short out. It happens.

You need to cry and be sad for you pets. It is hard to deal with I understand.

You can start a new grow again. This time it will be even better.

But to say God stopped running the universe so he could mess with you is going a little far.

I am really sad for you. But you must pick yourself up and go on.

sorry to hear you're having such a shitty day. i have days like that all the time too... i find it best to just take a few sleeping pills and go to sleep when things start getting that bad. if you manage to get it the extra sleep really helps you feel better when you wake up, and it's a new day, a new day to deal with all the problems you were handed the day before. but atleast this new day you woke up ready to deal wtih them rather than just be handed them unexpectingly.

KP- I am so sorry to hear about your loss - animals are little angels in our lives, if only they could be with us forever. I lost my beloved dog over a year ago after he'd been my closest friend for 16 years, so I know how hard it is- grief just means you have the capacity to love deeply, and that is a gift. The grow room disaster is just the last straw; I don't know why bad things seem to come in threes! What a rotten week you are having-

The law of nature is to balance itself, so while you are on the downswing, it always feels hopeless- but when it swings back up, you will smile again.
I know that is small comfort when you are in the middle of the painful time!

I'm sending you thoughts of comfort---------------------------------------:)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by kindprincess

:sadcrying:

ok, first, i find out that my little dog who just had puppies has pnuemonia. we tooke her to the vet on sat...she died overnite... we buried her sunday eve.

today, i find one of my big dogs dead in the yard. he's 13 years old, we knew he was gonna go this year, but it's too late to bury him tonite. so my brother and i are taking shifts, keeping our other dogs from chewing on him...

i come inside and my brother tells me there's a fire in my room.... we run to the bedroom and find it filled with smoke to the point that you can't see in there at all.

well, it was just the ballast shorting. however, i have no hps now, my plants are wilted and dead looking, as are my clones and moms....

can someone please shoot me? i'm scared of guns or i'd do it myself. it's days like these that make me want to take all of my pills at the same time...

sorry guys, but i'm crying right now, i've no one to talk to, my babies are dead, and i think my plants are too...

i'm gonna go cry some more.

---

dam that really sucks :( i know how it feels when u lose a pet after when u have had it for a long time its hard to let go and u feel if u lost a member of your family...and you basicly did. you can cry on my shoulders :( and as of the plants :( that sucks too guess its been a bad week huh? but hey who said there isnt a doggie haven? :) your dogs might be up there in a better place ;) hope you feel better :o

Quote:

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Originally Posted by slipknotpsycho

sorry to hear you're having such a shitty day. i have days like that all the time too... i find it best to just take a few sleeping pills and go to sleep when things start getting that bad. if you manage to get it the extra sleep really helps you feel better when you wake up, and it's a new day, a new day to deal with all the problems you were handed the day before. but atleast this new day you woke up ready to deal wtih them rather than just be handed them unexpectingly.

---

first, i appologize if i've offended anyone by any of my statements, i think i had a cybernetic nervous breakdown, in addition to everything else...

as it is, i cried myself to sleep, and got a few hours. things don't seem so bad now, though i cant kick this down in the dumps thing...

it looks like the clone moms are going to pull through, i took them out to get fresh air...

the flower box is done for, the lights have been off for 20 hours. so everythings getting chopped early...oh well...

yes, i'll still be growing, though everything may be put on hold for a while. i now have no flower lights.

eric, i realy don't want to answer your question... though i may have been fececious in the delivery, i've been arguing religeon for about a month, so if i've been smote, there's why...

lbmom, thank you, and the 3 thing... to me it always seems like three sets of threes...3x3

dopeboy, that's the deepest message i've ever seen come from you... i'm realy touched...

sorry for being so snotty, i'm not good with emotions, and the anxiety doesnt' help. thank you all for your support. it truely means alot to me.

love, kp

thanks, hope you feel better.:)

Did you get to keep any of the puppies?

sorry. at least you got some puppies :jointsmile:

the pups were a day old when she died; they'll be a week old tomorrow. four of them, we've been bottle feeding.

we burried rusty today...i think he's happy where we laid him, it was were he and i would go when i was having a hard time with something; i thought this would be a most appropriate memorial.

thank you all for your support, i'm a little better now, more clear minded... i just have to be sad for a little while, and get up and keep going. am glad i had some where to go to talk; my brother tried, but i can't realy break down in front of him, i'm supposed to be strong for him (he lives with me due to emphysema, he hates that i take care of him)

thanx again for being there, through my emotional outburst. i'm sorry about some of the stuff in the previous posts, i hope no one is offended...

i love you guys...

kp

ps, smoke it, i saw a one liner in your sig that made me smile:) thank you;)

I doubt you've offended anyone princess, well not me :) I know the feeling and sorry to hear you got it. I also had a grow what messed up a while back. When you put loads of love care and attention into a grow and lose it, its kinda like losing apart of yuh. Might sound stupid but people noticed i was feeling down because i acted without enthusiasm (which aint like me at all lol) ,,so i fixed what had broken and appreciated my lil mary even more. Losing a pet however is way worse,i dont have any but when i was little i cryed the day my rabbit died,, so imagine what i'd be like with a dog ffs! lol

laters :)

Kindprincess,

Man that is a really really bad day you had. Thank goodness your house didn't burn. Its so sad losing a pet but to lose 2 I know you must feel terrible. I know this won't sound like much now but the puppies will be your salvation.

When I was really ill I managed to raise a litter of kittens. It was so hard to do with the bottle feeding every 2 hours and all the other stuff. I was up night after night but it gave me a reason to make myself move.

I still have one of the kittens and she is my best friend. She still thinks I am her Mom and she is the smartest cat I have ever had.

Those puppies are really young and it will be very hard to raise them but if you put all your energy into it you could be raising your next best friend.

Good luck I hope you will post your progress.

Sending good vibes your way....

This is an Australian website but it has great info. I used it for my kittys :D

http://www.lowchensaustralia.com/bre...tlefeeding.htm

I am glad you are doing better. You have been in my thoughts,

dude i feel so bad, damn

i would just hang with friends and who ever says something u dont like or dont wanna do just say fuck you and be happy your dont work for pennies a day and live in a hut

lowryde, you're right, i'm planning on having some remodelling done...:)

bluecat, thanks for the link, very informative, were out to 5 hours between feedings now...

thank you eric, i think it helped...

gost, that's funny... but i kinda do work for pennies and yeah, my house is very rustic, almost hut-like;)

thanx everyone:)

love, kp

I am so excited for you.....I would love to see photos of their cute little faces!

Keep up the good work you are a very special person :)