Breaking the silence rule- a painful dilemma

My boss' wife has cancer.

She's had it twice before and was successfully treated. Now, she's been going through chemo and the medications are horrible.

She has spent her whole life virtually chemical-free- no drinking, no smoking, no perscription meds, always natural foods.

This morning I was asking after her and we were talking about vitamin C treatments and how so often the most effective treatments are the ones that are the simplest, oldest, adn that the big pharmaceuticals companies make no money on.

He mentioned that in the past she had been able to get through chemo using marijuana- and I almost fell on the floor.

I can just imagine how red my face must have been. We talk about gardening all the time. He's a BIG gardener and he used to smoke pretty heavily back in the day. He knows my significant other is quite the pothead; he knows I spend all my free time gardening in one way or another, but I'm certain he hasn't put 2 and 2 together yet.

Anyway I believe strongly that MJ is for sharing, not for selling. If there were ever a reason to show my hand, this would be it. I'm debating bringing some for her, and I know that if I do, my boss is going to know for sure where it came from.

Now, he's retiring soon, and I'm changing jobs when that happens anyway, and I KNOW he would never report me to human resources or whatever.

But it feels odd. We've worked together for a long time and it just feels like, wow, what if he told me something that just completely changed my image of him? Would he feel like I've been dishonest all these years?

I don't know. I'm leaning towards giving him some of the fruits of my garden for his wife, whom I greatly respect in her own right as a natural healthcare practicioner.

Does anyone have any insights on this tough situation?

He told you that his wife smokes MJ.. correct?
Maybe bake her some cookies and let him know that their is MJ in the BATCH.

Or maybe tell him that you shared the story with YOUR wife and she baked the cookies.

: )

iloveyou

I would not worry about being seen as dishonest. It is a safe thing to assume he understands the climate of persecution that exists regarding marijuana. Im hope he would understand why it is important for many people to be discreet.

The only other thing I have to say is that you already know in your heart what the right thing to do is and take strength from that. Your inner voice spoke and you listened. All that is left is to complete the circle by acting on what you feel in your soul.

The world needs more people like you.


peace.

Or you could say you know someone who could help and you would be willing to play middle man to protect him if he protects you?

Don't risk getting yourself in trouble. Cover your own arse by keeping your mouth shut - refer to Rule #1 of growing cannabis.
If your boss isn't smart enough to put 2 and 2 together then he is dumb enough to get you busted.
If they need mj then I'm sure they will aquire it without you being involved.
Good on you for having your heart in the right place though.

Doing the right thing is always the higher road. However, sometimes the higher road can also land you in jail.

Spare the part to save the whole. You can't do anyone much help in jail. Let this one pass for a safer opportunity. If you keep at it, I'm sure many more will come.

Remember, if he just happens to put two and two together, and just happens to talk about you to one of his friends, who just happens to have a brother-in-law who works for the local police department, you might be getting some unwanted visitors.

There's more than one way to sink a ship, if you get my drift.

"The Road to Hell is Paved with good Intentions"
Maybe he mention'd the "past" to test You?.
Do what ypu feel is right Fk Everybody else.

Me personaly. I cant answer until, if ever im in that situation

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Originally Posted by elcheapo

If your boss isn't smart enough to put 2 and 2 together then he is dumb enough to get you busted..

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I said he IS smart enough to figure out where it came from- and the guy holds a phD. I respect him more than anyone else I know.

He's also a Canadian citizen who grumbles occasionally about moving back to the Maritimes since the US government decided that all immigrants are potential terrorists. He has some farmland up there that his friend is managing organically, and I expect him to return to his homeland when he retires anyway. Geez, I would. Nova Scotia and PEI are like my favorite places on Earth.

I know he's sympathetic to the natural way of doing things- live wholesomely, avoid anything synthetic, etc.

Anyway Knowm, the boyfriend is the big baker in the house. I can't bake to save my ass. If it isn't salty, I'm not interested! Maybe I will make them some special pesto instead.

My gut tells me to break the rule on this one.

It's not getting busted I worry about in this case. It's more the shift in our relationship- going from supervisor/employee to sort of co-conspirators. DAMN the government for creating this artificial 'crime'.

Anyway thanks all for your insight.
I'll let you know how it went!

Another point I hate to bring up but itâ??s true; "No good deed goes unpunished"

Wow, Great story...I feel compassionate, butb you have to be careful...I think out of all the advice; pretending to be middle man might be the best bet...But those Damn 1st 3 rules...be careful, you have to follow your heart. peace.

I hope if I am suffering and not able to grow that someone with a big heart will help me out. good luck

Well, I told him this morning. Not specifically that I personally grow, but that I have a bunch that I can just give to his wife if she ever needs it.

I guess that's it. Simple. He sounded a little, but not very, suprised.. and maybe just as embarrassed as I. And definitely positive about the offer.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by stinkyattic

Well, I told him this morning. Not specifically that I personally grow, but that I have a bunch that I can just give to his wife if she ever needs it.

I guess that's it. Simple. He sounded a little, but not very, suprised.. and maybe just as embarrassed as I. And definitely positive about the offer.

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Excellent! I am sincerely happy it worked out that way. I knew you would do it just by the way you spoke of it. It warms my heart to know she will be getting some relief. Doesnt it feel great knowing you provided this for her ?
Youre awsome!

peace.

cool, that's great...Hope it all works out. peace

Well, this is months and months old, but it's time for a bump.
She passed away back in the early winter, surrounded by family and friends.
I totally came clean to him about a month ago about my op- right after I bailed on it and got rid of all my plants.
He wasn't a bit surprised.
That's the end of the story.

Sorry to hear Stinky, but you did make the right decision and that's what counts more than anything.:) In a situation like this i think it would be the time to break the rules of growing and help a friend out like you and i respect you even more for doing that :thumbsup:

wow thats cool that your gonna share some with her if needed, sounds like the husband was givin ya a hint maybe who knows, thats cool of you though props!

sorry about your friend, Stinky - just know that you did your part to ease her suffering, and maybe gave her a few days of relief - :thumbsup:

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Originally Posted by freewheelinfrank

just know that you did your part to ease her suffering, and maybe gave her a few days of relief

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As it turned out, she never took anything.
She stopped chemo entirely shortly after the thread was originally posted.
It was just too hard on her.

chemo is an extremely rough thing to go through my cousin she had breast cancer and the chemo treatments were really rough on her. lost lots of weight and got kinda sick but in the end everything came out good and it's unfortunate your boss's wife it was just too much for her.

It's a shame the gov and politicians don't realize that cannabis is a helpful plant and not the "gateway" drug that they preach it is. You are the example that the other fellow smokers need to follow :thumbsup:

My math tutor (i'm taking pre-calc in school but calc with him) has skin cancer and is going to go through chemo soon. That is one of the reasons I am starting to grow. He doesn't want to but it from a dealer because he is afraid that there might be additives (the whole glass bead thing and such). So I told him that when I harvest and he is going through chemo, I will give him whatever he needs. He is in his late 60's and is like a grandfather to me. I see him everyday for 2 hours a day, how could I not help.

Luckily my situation is a little lighter as one day we found the optimal grow space in my attic using trig and other things. We talk about pot just about every day in one way or another. Does anyone know a good strain for chemo patients?

Stinkyattic is such an inspiring person.

Strong indicas are recommended for chemo patients.

I hadn't read this thread, thanks for bumping it up, Stinkyattic. Very good thread folks.

Shovelhandle

One of the main reasons I'm setting up a grow room is that my friend has HIV, and his condition is slowly getting worse. His fear is that it will become full blown AIDS before long. He used to be a toker back in the day and knows I am and was asking me recently if I had a good connection because he might have need of it before long. So I'm going to grow and keep him supplied as well as possible. His medical bills are high enough as it is without getting gouged by a dealer too.

i've gotta agree with: just keep the silence. if she's used mj before, she can figure ways to get it again. keep the silence. always

[i've gotta agree with: just keep the silence. if she's used mj before, she can figure ways to get it again. keep the silence. always]
I got humbly disagree. In my state, it is NO option what so ever!
I'm 50, I had to watch my neighbor die a horrible death, cancer, his doctor TOLD him to find someone that could get marijuana to him, to eas him into death. He was in pain when consious. I asked his family to sign a paper to not prosecute me if I could get him MJ.....they would not do it! Half of them were worried about addiction, I stated he was dying, what worry? They were worried about authorities finding out...again, if it's my familey, to hell with the gov.
Well old Joe passed into the great unknown....in pain, crying, surrounded by familey who would not get passed unwarrented fear from a dispicable government. And in a sick way, I to failed OldJoe, I should have just gave it up, I had a grow going on, and was an easy target...but I still let him down.
Stinkyattic, handled it way better than I.

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Originally Posted by uzybear

i've gotta agree with: just keep the silence. if she's used mj before, she can figure ways to get it again. keep the silence. always

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Did you read the whole thread?
She passed away months ago, man.

And I still haven't been raided.
My close friends are honorable people who care enough to put themselves at risk to help a friend.
I know they would have done the same for me.

PlantBoxer, I'm sure that is not the last time you will be faced with a choice like that. It really sucks that the family was so misinformed about medical cannabis that their concern was over addiction... ??? ... I guess that one of the reasons that I AM honest with my close friends about my involvement in the cannabis community. It is important to me to educate as many people as I can so that no sick person is denied this powerful medicine because of the stigma surrounding illegal drug use.