bad problem, need educated help on decision

I have some bad problems. I have finally hit the stage that every1 warned me about but i always laughed about.
I am addicted. I started off just dealing for a while. THen i started smoking weed for a few years almost everyday. THen i got on probation and decided i needed to try some other drugs starting with cocaine. Now i have done many of the popular "hard" drugs out their and now im fucked. Especially because i have been snorting buprenorphine for about 60+ days straight and now i have run out. THere use to be a good supply of a few other drugs nearby but some little rich bitch bought i t all up with his mommy and daddy;s money for almost double the price. My sources either cannot get buprenorphine due to the strict rehab-only watch on it and my other source got, a good friend of mine, got shot and killed buying drugs in the city. Evven with the death of a close friend i still crave any drug i can get my hands on except pot. I have also been using cocaine and adderall frequently and whenever i got tired and wanted to sleep at night buprenorphine(suboxone) came to the rescure. That's what's really horrible about it. You can have the worst hangover you've ever had and you hit a line of that and you feel good for 8 hours and your pain is gone. When i was sick of the stims i would just snort buprenorphine. THough i am pretty much addicted to all of them any random drug will calm my symptoms and i can operate normally(except otc bullshit, sry but once you've tried the hard drugs those are nothing but headaches). BUt all my dealers have are things like coke which i love but it really screws me on the comedown making me lose my mind so i have to put a pause on that. What's worse is i am in highschool and in order to function and do my work i have to be atleast buzzing or else i just refuse to do it i won't even look at it bevause i know my mind is spinning so fast i can't even read. I just sleep, talk, eat, or cause trouble. I know this may appear funny to a lot of you but it's pretty painfull.

My actual question is I have been to the doctor twice this month because my mom is sick of me sleeping in(I'm a senior in h-school). He sends my mom out and asks me my drug abuse history and i tell him i smoked pot everyday for a few years before i got busted but that's all i have told him so far. IF i tell him about the actual truth of my horrible addiction i have hope he may prescribe me something to ease the pain and i an operate again. But i severly fear he might tell my mom and then suggest i go to a rehab center where i will be cut off from all my friends. And this is not a psychiatrist. My parents refuse to take me to one because they know they will hand out scripts with ease. THis is a pediatric doctor. I thought the cutoff age was 18 but i guess not. He suggested medication for depression but if its not gonna give me a buzz then it's another waste of time. I have a buddy who is gonna be coming back from spring break with a nice load of stuff but i don't know if i can wait and if i can get a script for something to calm me thats even better. But if the chances the doc will try to send me to some bs rehab(which for people like me only works for as long i am in the rehab) then i plan to wait.


So i am trying to weigh out the choice. If i get sent to rehab im really gonna be fucked because i lost almost $ i made 15k selling to my massive court fines, jail costs, attorney fees. Now i am actually atleast $3k in debt and i don't want to get a job because my drug problem renders me lazy and nervous, and besides in my small town about a half hour from the city all of snitch bitch kids have spread the word to the hole damn town about me dealing. Most of the employers know who i am and toss my application in the trash can.


So i am looking for some smart opinions on what to do here. Obviously the best opinion would be to admit and do the rehab but rehab alone will not help me at all except give me another bill to pay and cost me time, and maybe even cause me to go to prison when i attempt escaping and beat the hell out of one of the employees their.


Sorry about the whole damn story but i have no clue what to decide. I am going back to the doctor within about 3 weeks. THanks all.

How old are you? If you're over 18, you can go to a doctor by yourself.

If you're dependent on Suboxone then a doctor can prescribe it to you. It's actually meant for those with an opiate dependence(ironic). You'll probably have to tell him you have an opiate dependence, etc. I wouldn't tell him that you've done Suboxone because then he might not prescribe it to you. Tell him you're using some other prescription opiate(percs, norcos, oxy, whatever).

Or if there's a methadone clinic around your area you can go down there. You'll have to test positive for opiates but that's an option.

I know what you mean about always needing "at least" a buzz to get anything done. Sounds similar to when I was wrapped up in Opiate-use. The only way to really feel better is to break the cycle.

I can't give you any advice about your personal issues but if you're experiencing physical withdrawal from the buprenorphine there are some over the counter remedies you could try.
Loperamide (Immodium AD) is actually an opioid but it is void of any psychological effects since it does not cross the blood brain barrier. You'll probably require a dose higher than recommended but it will likely help ease the withdrawals.
Something like ibuprofen can be taken along with it for general aches. Melatonin can be used to help you sleep, along with some good bud.

Try kratom, I found a site that has purified the Mitragynine to 90% and sells it as a ethyl alcohol tincture - it's awesome and comparable to a good dose of oxycodone (although probably just as expensive). However, supposedly kratom is addictive also, I don't know about that though because I used the shit out of kratom until my tolerance was so high that I was having to double or triple the doses, and I quit with no withdrawals or any negative effects. Food for thought, hope it works out for ya.

Ya fuck man, ur becoming one of the statistics. I got bored with weed too but I didnt jump to cocaine because when you do that you gotta keep going up. I started with Ritalin, then Oxys, and now my fav drugs is E I still got tones of breathing room that I will never reach shit like coke, and H, and meth and what ever your doin.

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Originally Posted by glock18

But i severly fear he might tell my mom and then suggest i go to a rehab center where i will be cut off from all my friends. And this is not a psychiatrist. My parents refuse to take me to one because they know they will hand out scripts with ease.[/I]

He suggested medication for depression but if its not gonna give me a buzz then it's another waste of time.

So i am trying to weigh out the choice. If i get sent to rehab im really gonna be fucked because i lost almost $ i made 15k selling to my massive court fines, jail costs, attorney fees. Now i am actually atleast $3k in debt and i don't want to get a job because my drug problem renders me lazy and nervous

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Here's the thing. You're already 18. So I think its best if you just took a little personal responsibility before the courts force you too. Tell the doctor what you've done in case he might be able to work something out. And I think it's stupid to only look for drugs that will give you a buzz. You need to find something to put in your life that you can't get addicted to, rather than just searching for another high.
I'll even say it: Maybe you're not the sort of person who should be using drugs.
I don't think all people should be dealers either. It requires a certain knack for not getting caught.

While I don't think drugs are really the cause of any of your problems, I can almost positively state that they will not be the solution.

peace

Polymirize, i somewhat understand what you are saying but i always somewhat do not. My point is that if i am not high then i can't seem to get anyhting done. thats when i noticed i had a problem. but i would rather be fucked up on some drug and getting my schoolwork done and other things rather than not being fucked up and sitting around doing typically nothing and not advancing in any way and wasting time. iguess you have to be in my position to understand.



And i know many people frown at hard drugs and people that do them, but it is no better to smoke weed everyday than it is to snort coke everyday. for some reason a shitload of people don't seem to think it's the same thing but really it is.

Does anyone know the costs of methadone/suboxone clinic treatment?

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Originally Posted by glock18

My point is that if i am not high then i can't seem to get anyhting done. thats when i noticed i had a problem. but i would rather be fucked up on some drug and getting my schoolwork done and other things rather than not being fucked up and sitting around doing typically nothing and not advancing in any way and wasting time. iguess you have to be in my position to understand.

And i know many people frown at hard drugs and people that do them, but it is no better to smoke weed everyday than it is to snort coke everyday. for some reason a shitload of people don't seem to think it's the same thing but really it is.

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No I agree with you. The Problem is that you can't get anything done unless you're on drugs. Where we differ, is that I don't think drugs are actually going to be the solution to this problem. It's that simple.

And on another note, I can smoke all day and still accomplish what I need to. I choose not to however, because I don't really need to and sobriety is so much cheaper. The beautiful thing about drug use is I have a choice whether or not I wish to partake.
I'm not sure if its hard drugs, or merely the users of hard drugs that make this choice disappear. Having never been addicted to heroin I don't know if it's actually such a strong dependence or if the users just lack anything resembling a will. I suspect it's a bit of both. But having a will of my own I can simply choose to not get involved with "hard" drugs then.

I have a life, and that's a good thing. Life can be enhanced by drug use even, but I don't think drugs should ever become the primary focus of life. Then you wouldn't have a life, only a drug, and as soon as you're down you have to find another drug. What a vicious cycle. Someone should have warned the children.

"the drugs/devil made me do it"

A lot of people are dependant on drugs. "Socially acceptable" drugs such as coffee, cigarettes and anti depressants are just as crucial to their users as other kinds of drugs are to their users.
I'm happy that I never got hooked on coke or herion or what ever, but i am dependant on weed and hallucinogens...other wise I'm stuck in bed all day, depressed as hell getting nothing done
But did I ever get anything done before I got addicted? Probably not too much
I'm just saying, I know where your coming from first hand and its cool. The people in the wrong in these situations are the anti-drug people, the ones keeping us in our respective mental prisions with their retarded prohibition

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Originally Posted by glock18

Does anyone know the costs of methadone/suboxone clinic treatment?

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Methadone Clinics in Los Angeles area is around $10 per dose. The dose being dependent on what they prescribe you

Not sure about the cost of suboxone, but if prescribed from a doctor it should be affordable if you have health insurance.

Suboxone would be the better choice in the long-term for getting rid of your addiction(if you do indeed plan to quit at some point), but methadone clinics give you more anonymity.

for about 2 1/2 years i was in the same mental situation as you with perocets and darvons which i was taking up to 15 each day untill i was compleatly broke and depressed all the time. i was on the verge of suicide. but i went to a 4 month rehab center in and ive been opiate free since and hopefully from now on. so i would stronly suggest going into rehab and really listening to what they say.

oh ya, coffee and cigarettes are a rehab patients best friend, keep that in mind.

Dude I hate to be a jerk, but your whole post is about how you have run out of drugs, and how you need a doctor to prescribe you some more shit to help you cope with the pain of the after effects of the use of other shit. Just stick with school and donâ??t give up. I think its BS to say you canâ??t do school without a buzz. I used to smoke before school a lot, and its great fun, but it wonâ??t help you. You donâ??t need a prescription for anything, if youâ??ve already realized that youâ??re addicted then more is the opposite of what you need
Sorry if Iâ??m being a bitch

Just to voice my 2 cents. First off, you realize that you have a problem which is a hard thing to do in itself. Next (and these are just my opinions) you need to be detoxed with rehab. I know it's easier said than done but YOU come first. Once you are cleaned up and become yourself again, people will want to hang with you, school work will get done because you will be you again, your thinking process will be more positive in general --others will notice and that job application just might not get tossed.

Find a good detox/rehab center, they will provide you with meds that will help with the w/d's.

You will make some friends that are going through the same things you are-guaranteed. (I've been there). Although I still toke a little, i'm more in control of myself. If you like and believe in your doctor AND WANT TO COME CLEAN, then do it. Not trying to be sarcastic here, but if you OD and expire, school really doesn't mean much.

Get the help you need, talk to a counselor for their advice. They will help, that's what they do. They are good people (alot are former addicts, they know where you're coming from). DON'T LOOSE YOUR MARBLES. Do it for yourself, listen to those who can help you. (That was my problem, I didn't listen). Lastly, talk with you're doc and start making a few calls. You'll recover. Good luck--Getting started is the hard part, you CAN do it!

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Originally Posted by wholapola

Just to voice my 2 cents. First off, you realize that you have a problem which is a hard thing to do in itself. Next (and these are just my opinions) you need to be detoxed with rehab. I know it's easier said than done but YOU come first. Once you are cleaned up and become yourself again, people will want to hang with you, school work will get done because you will be you again, your thinking process will be more positive in general --others will notice and that job application just might not get tossed.

Find a good detox/rehab center, they will provide you with meds that will help with the w/d's.

You will make some friends that are going through the same things you are-guaranteed. (I've been there). Although I still toke a little, i'm more in control of myself. If you like and believe in your doctor AND WANT TO COME CLEAN, then do it. Not trying to be sarcastic here, but if you OD and expire, school really doesn't mean much.

Get the help you need, talk to a counselor for their advice. They will help, that's what they do. They are good people (alot are former addicts, they know where you're coming from). DON'T LOOSE YOUR MARBLES. Do it for yourself, listen to those who can help you. (That was my problem, I didn't listen). Lastly, talk with you're doc and start making a few calls. You'll recover. Good luck--Getting started is the hard part, you CAN do it!

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^^good advice
And if that doesnt work
these will