Hi! I'm new....advice needed

Hi everyone, I'm Zach. This is actually my first message board I've joined. I've looked around and read shit on others and know how stuff works. So hopefully I wont be too much of a ignorant, annoying noobie. 23, male, from Houston. I do singer/songwriter acoustic stuff. That's about it....

Anyways, I need some advice (not related to the format though). My cat!!! I aquired this cat from a crackhead old friend of mine. He couldn't take care of it, and I love animals. All of them. So I took him in. Appropriately named him Cheese. I've had him for about 5 months. I can't fucking control him! He does not get the idea of what's wrong. I tried (easy) smacking him, spraying him with water, yelling at him and even just flat out scareing him (stoming on the floor and crap). I am working out the morality issue in my head about getting him fixed... maybe by the end of the week, I'll have a view. Any advice? Experiances? Help?!?

Getting him fixed would be the best thing, those little things can make all the difference in the world on a dog or cat's behavior.

also, you could make him an outside cat to give him a means of burning off his energy. my 2 cats used to fight connstantly, and 1 of them actually tried to get us mad just for a reaction lol, but once we started letting them go outside they've been acting just fine and rarely fighting anymore.

There doesn't seem like there's anything to do.. maybe the crack fucked him up.. if the guy smoked him out.

Maybe getting him "fixed" will help him out.. hope so, as I don't like to see animals getting into more trouble than they need.

take some scissors and snip them balls off.

the thing to do is this.put that disobedient lil bastard in a drawer.then braek up like two grams of some good buds.then take a big hit and blow smoke in the drawer.do this till the cat is comatose.repeat everyday for life.

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Originally Posted by friendowl

the thing to do is this.put that disobedient lil bastard in a drawer.then braek up like two grams of some good buds.then take a big hit and blow smoke in the drawer.do this till the cat is comatose.repeat everyday for life.

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I completely agree... he hates pot though. I'm a real softie. He's young and innocent. Isn't that a porno?!?

Get ready, this will be a shortened version but still loong.
You need the cat to respect you or it wont ever listen to you.
I have been fostering and training animals all my life and this is a major thing you must accomplish. You see dogs want to please you, cats want you to please them.
So, youve got to stop the smacking, and the scaring because it is counterproductive to other positive measures you take.
First thing to do is give him a week with no rules. Seriously, if he is having behavior problems you first need him to feel relaxed enough to communicate.
So, no rules and much much much pampering. Give him lots of affection, some treats, no pot (!) , and talk to him and make eye contact. Eye contact with gentle voice and reassuring words. Use his name when you pat him. He will begin to associate his name as a good thing. Take the time to allow him to get so relaxed that he will fall asleep on you. This will make a huuuge step for his trust.
Cats store stress in their ears so gentle massages there will work great.

A couple pointers for when you do want to train him are never use his name when correcting behavior. He will associate his name with discipline if you do.
You have to be patient, just like with a child. He doesnt know the language so you must teach him.
Cats communicate 95% with body language , not vocally. They vocalise as a way to communicate with us vocal creatures. So, when he meows to you, pay attention, he is trying to communicate. Figure out what he wants with trial and error and eventually you two will work out a language between you. When he feels you are interested in what he says, he will become interested in what you say. Opposite than dogs. Dog training techniques are ineffective for cats.
When you come in the door, greet kitty right away.
When you leave say goodbye.
Its all about building a relationship.
A cat wont be intimidated. This will create behavior problems.
be consistant. Dont switch up your techniques or itll never work.
A cat is a creature of routing and habbit and need a stable unchanging environment to be truly happy. A cat will punish you directly for changes, or for upsetting the routine, or neglecting to make him the centre of your world when he wants attention.
Ive got lots more info,I could go on for pages, but its all for after the first week of no rules. Get that far and Ill be glad to keep providing tips.
My advice will make a difference in your cat, trust me. Ive trained wild cats to be domesticated. I know how its done.
Feel free to email me.

sage_wisdom(at)hushmail(dot)com

Hey that's great advice! Alot of what you say makes sense. I'm the type of person that likes to be completely alone when I come home from work. At least until I get a blunt in my system. I'm usually not in a good mood. But I quickly shift. So when I come home is when I'm the least attentive. And that's when he's in my face. So I will try the no rules thing and let you know how it works. Do you think that pampering him all the time will get him too used to it? There are alot of times that I want to be left alone.

Yea He'll get quite used to it and come around now and again and ask for it but remember house cats sleep a majority of the time and are solitary animals so youll still have plently of time to chill on your own. I have 2 now and I have no problem when I want to be alone.
The most Ive ever had in my home is 17 and still had time to myself.

Cats are not like dogs in the sense of pack mentality so they dont need someone around all the time.
When he does come and you dont want him, I suggest you still say a quick hello and a rub with eye contact . It seems to be important to them and simple gestures foster that relationship and respect.
Have fun. Ive always enjoyed 'training' animals.

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Originally Posted by FactionGroove

Hi everyone, I'm Zach.

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i dont like you...we have the same name...

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Originally Posted by flamingskullballs

i dont like you...we have the same name...

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ya well u smell :pimp:

calm down guys. this is a website of peace and pot.

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Originally Posted by passit420

calm down guys. this is a website of peace and pot.

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: passes the joint :

hey, im calm *throws boot at someone*...

no, your right...i do smell...

i really dont not like you...it was just something that happened, ya know?

in response to original question-

beastiality?

Ya, I'm just playing also man.

You know I've been following homeboy's advice and he's just been sleeping the entire time since. He wakes up, I'm really nice to him for like 3 mins, start ignoring him again and he goes back to sleep w/o whining.