i enjoy fucking things. i dont know y but i fuck couches and mostly anything my penis can fit in i put lotion in tight plastic cylinders
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i enjoy fucking things. i dont know y but i fuck couches and mostly anything my penis can fit in i put lotion in tight plastic cylinders
Wow. You have taken masturbation to a new level, my friend. LoL. The oddest thing I've done to masturbate is switch hands. Took me 2 minutes to get the rhythm down and then it was easy going from there.
P.S. What exactly do you want us to tell you?
I jerked off onto a leaf, once.
LOL, I can see it now:Quote:
Originally Posted by P.E.N.G.U.I.N.
"I fuck the couch, too."
"Ooh ooh, me too, I was SURE I was the only one!"
"I fuck any and all inanimate objects."
"inanimate object fuckers unite!!!"
Im sure there's a forum out there.
Then we'll have to listen to whether or not man can marry an inanimate object of his choosing (after all, it is HIS life) and get the benefits of marriage that people who marry other people get...well I dunno about you but Im tired of THAT age-old debate. If a man feels his life would be more fulfilling with his couch, more fullfilling knowing that his ass and dick can park itself there anytime and is always welcome (not the same when it comes to intimacy with people, I totally get that!), then by golly he is entitled to that right and happiness, is he not?
Fuck your couch with all your might sir. I for one support your union.
FUCK YO COUCH NIGGA!
Sorry I couldn't resist. That's from Chappelle's show, for all who didn't get it.
ahahahahahahahahahaQuote:
Originally Posted by P.E.N.G.U.I.N.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ousted
I am so stoned man. And I know that thing you just typed blew me away. Clean out of this world. Thank you. That was the most amazing thing I have ever read. You must be stoned, surely. I am, and that was amazing. Wow.
he doesn't want you to say anything, that's just nakedgunner, he likes saying random weird shit and reading the responses or he likes to cause uproar....we've had a couple...another you might look into is professorevil
currently im eating a reese's peanut butter cup
fucking a couch is wierd btw...but hey, who hasnt woken up one day and said "i think the couch cushion good go for a good pounding, mmmm yeah"
me
lol
liar
I find it hard to see how a cushion could be used as a mock vagina......but whatever floats ya boat :-)
penis
LMAO!Quote:
Originally Posted by P.E.N.G.U.I.N.
i go around the house and put my wanger in empty light sockets, sometimes the power is on,sometimes it isnt, if am extra horny ill try the 3way switch in the livingroom.....
sombody get him a cactus
ok...
i was screewing around on my sisters cmp and found a movie of a guy fucking a bed,k he had his dick in between the matres and the box spring, weird shit i tell u.
i once did my... wait, is this inanimate objects? never mind....
try a tampon. hahaha
i fucked the whole in my boxers one time
ill bet 100 dollars that onwe of ui has fucked your bong,, thats fucking discusting
get off your high horse... or ... sober that horse up anyways! dont tell anyone something is disgusting! that is for you to decide for yorself alone, not someone else. they dont have to feel that bong-sex is nasty, just because you do...?
oh, sorry, just stating your opinion. my bad. you're not trying to make anyone feel any less of themselves.
the wierdest shit ive done is finger my ass
that's not what's important, did you enjoy it or not? lol
Quote:
Originally Posted by dopefiend
yea i used to do that when i was high n jerkin off. it actually felt good. and no im not gay. everyones ass has a g-spot or something like it
bong sex.... hmm, a salty, more thick substitute for water.... you can tip the bong, and it wont spill as fast!!
WOAH!!! what if you put sperm in your bong, then smoked alot out of it, till the sperm had thc in it!! then got a chick pregnant with it!! wooooah! sweet idea! would you get a green baby, a high baby, or a fuckin superhero!?
thats not a bong, thats for my schlong... lolQuote:
Originally Posted by hipEstoner
anywho... you would think all of this fucking cushions and shit would cause chafing...
oh well... whatever beats your meat man... (whatever floats your boat for those of you who dont understand my lamer humor)
hmmm...why dont you get a girlfriend and do things to her instead of your couch....Im sure your penis will appreciate it more.
wouldnt fuckin yer couch start to hurt after a while, i would think you would get rugburn or something :confused: