Masturbation Leads to violence, Depression, and forgetfulness. NEEDS TO BE OUTLAWED!

Man, Christians run out of things to bitch about, I swear. Read this Story

http://www.truechristian.com/masturbation.html

This has to be a joke.

"Masturbation costs American businesses at least $3.14 billion in lost productivity every month!"

ROFL!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Maui Wowie

This has to be a joke.

"Masturbation costs American businesses at least $3.14 billion in lost productivity every month!"

ROFL!

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You should read the rest of their website. Seriously, I have no idea it they are serious or if it's a parody website.

dude that made my wake and bake session worthwhile....masterbation is more dangerous then drugs?? WTF....i must be takin some shitty ass drugs

ban all masterbation paraphenalia?.....they gun make kleenex and my hand illegal er sumthin?
I can't decipher if that is a joke or what.

And XTC,may i ask how you came across a site of this nature...not to put you on the spot or nething :) :) ;)

Man that would put the Hot Tub industry out of busness...lol Oh them Jets do work...lol

Quote:

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Originally Posted by EverydayJunglist

dude that made my wake and bake session worthwhile....masterbation is more dangerous then drugs?? WTF....i must be takin some shitty ass drugs

ban all masterbation paraphenalia?.....they gun make kleenex and my hand illegal er sumthin?
I can't decipher if that is a joke or what.

And XTC,may i ask how you came across a site of this nature...not to put you on the spot or nething :) :) ;)

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I'm a member of MySpace and I found it in political debate fourm

LMAO! i cant believe they said "practically all rapists, Sodomites, child molesters and pornography addicts started out as Masturbators" wow, this is complete bullshit. its like saying 97% of these people learned how to ride a bike. so does that mean riding a bike is the cause for rapists and all that stuff?

Its not like famous scientists who have saved millions of lives didnt start out as masturbators.

i didn't know there were people that didn't masturbate lol.

yeah, it's gotta be bullshit after reading it. they propose a movement to ban all sausages and dildo-like foods.

Guys, this is definitely a joke page... Did any of you read the other pages? The Christian Science one is hilarious :D

Heh thats pretty funny, I just don't get religions that tell everyone what not to do, but then again I assume that page is a joke.

god must really hate me i wasted so much sperm so far in my life .mayb my pleasure must be his pain so why the fuck did he make it that way if he created us all, why would he really give a shit in all seriousnes. it's not like iv got a limited supply. and these guy actauly want me to waste my fuckin precious time on this earth to go for a check up to see if iv tossed off aload.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha haha
I've tossed off many loads... what can they do... nothing.

My friend, if you ever had any doubt that Masturbation, Violence and Liberalism are the inseparable causes of the current Assault on America!

MASTURBATION EQUALS VIOLENCE! How can any honest person believe otherwise in the face of the overwhelming evidence presented here? The one thing that the authors of these messages have in common, other than the fact that they are all seething powderkegs of homicidal fury, is that they all MASTURBATE!

LIBERALISM EQUALS VIOLENCE! Note well the Liberal political philosophies parroted by so many of these diatribes! This proves more than ever that ALL Liberal political movements, including Feminism, Communism, Kalistaism, Vegetarianism, the Democratic Party and the current "Peace" movement, are nothing but violent death cults fueled by the evil hatred that comes from Chronic Masturbation! Can anything be more chilling than a warning that you are on a list of victims to be "killed by people with open minds and accepting personalities?"

hahahahahahaahahaa
off that site
masturbation: assualt on america haha

Somehow I had a visual image of an irate monkey rocking back and forth while I was reading that luny shit.
heh heh heh heh heh heh heh hehehehe

the funnest thing is that chart with crime and masturbation

Is there a connection between this thread and the one where you wake up with genitals of the opposite sex? Should it be outlawed, is going in one of my ears and "I'd beat that shit" is going in the other. I can't hear.

LMFAO

omg mastubation is a gateway sin lmfao

holy hell that is the dumbest thing ive ever heard...hmm i cummed on the ground before...sorry god

im ashamed to be catholic, dam were idoits

later

wow i finished reading it

"We need the same tactics and the same kind of get-tough attitude that has been so successful in the War On Drugs!"

uh where the fuck was i when the cristians were winning the war on drugs...o ya...GETTIN HIGH!!! :cool:

omfg banning candles...lmao this has got to be the worst attempt ever by catholics, there just not as creative as they used to be

wow i feel stupider (and thats not even a word) after reading this crap

"Simple, modest underwear would sell itself and minimize unGodly temptations."

lol jesus christ the more i read the more hilarious this gets...Ungodly temptations...lol wtf?

ya im done now lol

wow

later

Experts estimate that there are at least 150,000 Americans masturbating RIGHT NOW!

its also got links to other funny sites telling people to get rid of their candles....it might be more serious but stilll.....its a fuckinng lump of wax and some string

are dildos really illegal in texas???

thank god this is a joke this picture was on the site so it has to be a joke :D

ya i emailed the guy and told him hes an immature bitch and what not

AND HE ADDED ME ON MSN :eek:

lol he probly thinks im an altar boy or sumthing

later

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Az.

are dildos really illegal in texas???

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incredibly enough, they are. there was quite a debate sparked a few years ago when a sex therapist was arrested, and charged (facing jail time), for selling "obsene items" to married couples who were having sexual difficulties :rolleyes:

I'm already violentand forgetful, what do I have to lose by jerking off? They're right about productivity, though. I do it in the bathroom at work all the time, way cooler when you're getting paid for it.

fuckin gay