Aliens are eating my stash

Day 1:

I know they are. I can smell it on their breath, the little purple bastards. I tried all the usual remedies -- shark repellent, pungi sticks, flypaper -- but I only made them angry. Every day I look there's a little bit more gone, and pot crumbs all over my desk.

Day 2:

Nailed one, with shrimp fork I was using to clean my bowl. Had the sucker pinned to the table, but as I moved in with the scissors, he ripped off his ear and fled. And the f'r actually grabbed a nug in broad nightlight while I was sitting their vegging with a stony stare.

Dat 3:

My bag is gone and I'm really high. There's a bud stuffed in my nose, a calling card of the alien mafia I fear. Checked the growroom and saw that they had manicured my plants without my permission, topping 2. Bastards. I hope you die and rot in wherever you guys go to rot.

Come back if you dare -- I got a double-barreled shotgun full of M&M's, and I'm ready to blast you into a sugary sweet oblivion.

But anyways, that's not what I wanted to ask. What I wanted to ask IS "Do you think I'm crazy or are there really aliens chowing down on my stash?"

crazy :(

i dunno man aliens are pretyt crazy

Yeah, the nation's immigration system is unbelievable.

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Originally Posted by OR Freebird

the little purple bastards.

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Never seen a purple Mexican, though. The fuck drugs are you on?

I think the aliens are crazy. The ones here took me in as one of their own. I'm smoking with one right now. He won't pass the J that greedy little fucker.

"Reality is a fun place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there"

Yeah, they don't like to share. Never smoked with one, but I'll smoke the next one I catch dippin into my stash

Quote:

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Originally Posted by OR Freebird

but I'll smoke the next one I catch dippin into my stash

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Careful what you say. :X

yer right. I'll just wrap my stash in Aluminum Wrap, that oughta foil them

True. Do these aliens have any friends? Always smoke other people's buds.

You guys tell me if im wrong but i dont think it is weed that guys is smoking

Quote:

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Originally Posted by OR Freebird

Day 1:

I know they are. I can smell it on their breath, the little purple bastards. I tried all the usual remedies -- shark repellent, pungi sticks, flypaper -- but I only made them angry. Every day I look there's a little bit more gone, and pot crumbs all over my desk.

Day 2:

Nailed one, with shrimp fork I was using to clean my bowl. Had the sucker pinned to the table, but as I moved in with the scissors, he ripped off his ear and fled. And the f'r actually grabbed a nug in broad nightlight while I was sitting their vegging with a stony stare.

Dat 3:

My bag is gone and I'm really high. There's a bud stuffed in my nose, a calling card of the alien mafia I fear. Checked the growroom and saw that they had manicured my plants without my permission, topping 2. Bastards. I hope you die and rot in wherever you guys go to rot.

Come back if you dare -- I got a double-barreled shotgun full of M&M's, and I'm ready to blast you into a sugary sweet oblivion.

But anyways, that's not what I wanted to ask. What I wanted to ask IS "Do you think I'm crazy or are there really aliens chowing down on my stash?"

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lmao, hahahaha, that was hilarious....

lol

what the fuck r u on faggot and give me sum bitch share with the class

Quote:

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Originally Posted by OR Freebird

yer right. I'll just wrap my stash in Aluminum Wrap, that oughta foil them

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Ouch, that pun was fucking awful, you should be ashamed of yourself.

i would get a dog maybe one of them lil ankle munching breeds they are pretty quick and train em to guard your garden just make sure you gaive it a doggy treat every time he brings ya one of the little weed snatchers or he might go insurgent on you

...alright, so the plan is this. get a jar (nuthing to big, nuthing to small, just ur average alien sized jar)...put a decent bud in the bottom, one thats suuure to grab their attention...now the next bits the sneaky part...u put BUTTER (or lube, whichever is closest) around the inside rim of the jar...so the purple fucknuts jump in after ur weed only to find the walls are to slippery to climb out of!! thats how i caught my alien...his name is alf...hes my friend :D ... oh wait, maybe that was an 80's tv show :confused: ...fuck... ill get back to you on that...

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Originally Posted by Bunkyhope

...alright, so the plan is this. get a jar (nuthing to big, nuthing to small, just ur average alien sized jar)...put a decent bud in the bottom, one thats suuure to grab their attention...now the next bits the sneaky part...u put BUTTER (or lube, whichever is closest) around the inside rim of the jar...so the purple fucknuts jump in after ur weed only to find the walls are to slippery to climb out of!! thats how i caught my alien...his name is alf...hes my friend :D ... oh wait, maybe that was an 80's tv show :confused: ...fuck... ill get back to you on that...

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I like a man with a plan. I think I'll substitute silicon spray for butter -- if it works, I'll post a pic

I suggest getting very paranoid, wearing an aluminum hat, barricading yourself into your room with furniture propped against all points of entry, while you hide in a mashed potato fork with a remington, ten grenades and darty eyes. If your family tries to breach your sanctum under the guise of "taking you to get help" they are undoubtedly aliens masquerading behind your own memories, and you must execute them immediately.

lol...

don't forget to bring a towel.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by OR Freebird

yer right. I'll just wrap my stash in Aluminum Wrap, that oughta foil them

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haha wtf

GOD I HATE FUCKING ALIENS THAT STEAL MY WEED!!!!

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Originally Posted by w4terb0ng

lol...

don't forget to bring a towel.

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I wasn't planning on hitching a ride with them. But it could be used to take a snap at their ass as thry're runnin for the door.

Will stock towel, and double-sided tape just in case I get lucky. Good idea.

I like the aluminum hat and the Remington. That really makes this a class act. Must act in strictest secrecy to avoid detection.

Will check back later. Kepp those ideas flowin ...

Peace.

Out.

Call the ghostbusters, oh wait, we're dealing with aliens here? Call Sigourney Weaver!!!

First build a huge spacship stock it with plenty of weed then fly to an uncharted planet, pick up some sort of distress call land on the planet and then fight the little purple bastards. Find their homeworld and have a little boy named ender blow it up with little 3 dimensional squares. Then celebrate by finding a hidden stockpile of weed on Kashyyyk and then smoke out with Chewbacca and his Wookiee harem.

Then wake up a few days later and realize that you took 16 mics of acid.

damn aliens I had a problem with those bastards lol

Quote:

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Originally Posted by w4terb0ng

lol...

don't forget to bring a towel.

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I wasn't planning on hitching a ride with them. But it could be used to take a snap at their ass as thry're runnin for the door.

Will stock towel, and double-sided tape just in case I get lucky. Good idea.

I like the aluminum hat and the Remington. That really makes this a class act. Must act in strictest secrecy to avoid detection.

Will check back later. Kepp those ideas flowin ...

Peace.

Out.

It's fucked up how they keep on comin to earth with no weed, I saw the plane/ship whatever the fuck they came in on once, it was way more advanced then any thing we have, but why is their ganj not as good as ours?

HAHAHAHAHA

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Originally Posted by chris420

HAHAHAHAHA

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Towely is the man.

You saw the ship !? Was it spliff shaped??? With a glowing red ember at the arse end.

I've seen it in my dreams. I keep rolling leafy substances in it's image trying to get a handle on this.