love.......

For me growing up as a shy person it has been difficult for me to leave my comfort zone and to ultimately get a girlfriend. But now Im 21 and this year I feel Ive finally began breaking out of it.

True love is something that ive always longed for. Just to see others with a companion makes me feel so alone and I get depressed often. Well like I said Ive began breaking out of my shell and becoming more comfortable being around the opposite sex. Im not great with keeping conversation but Im still trying

Well at the beginning of this year I began talking to one woman whom I fell madly in love with. And after a couple of months she tells me she loved me. God, I felt the greatest feeling ive ever had in my life, better than any drug ive ever experienced.

Well of course like most things in my life it was too good to be true. I began visiting her this week and she is all of a sudden distant. At a karaoke bar she sang a song and dedicated it to me. But when she was asked if I was her boyfriend she said no just a special friend. At that moment my heart fell on the ground. Days after this she acts like there is nothing wrong but down inside I know that she does not have feelings for me and there is probably someone else. Ive told her so many times to just be truthful and if she doesnt want to be with me just tell me.

Its like now she keeps pushing me away but wont let go because Im the only man that hasnt broke her heart and has always been there for her.
Well today I hope to see her soon so we can have a good talk and to go our own ways. Im interested in to see what she says

But anyways Ive never really been good with women and Id give anything in this world to have a woman which appreciates and will love me. It just seems like there isnt ever anyone for me though. Everyday I wake up I think about love and just feel like shit

And the worst part about all this is that I cant smoke for another 2 months.

You'll get over it man,lets face it love at first sight isnt all that nowadays.Honestly I was shy and all that jazz too.You gotta give it some time bro,seems to me your just wanting everything to rush fast.Trust me thats not the right idea,been there done that. Let it run its course man,being smitten is not love dude.

I was the same way when I was younger. I'm on the autistic spectrum, and it wasn't that I didn't want to talk to people (especially guys), it's just they didn't want to hear the 30 minute ramblings about photosynthesis, or undersea hydrogen sulfide vents. Didn't help my geographical location was full of white bread people who thought culture was calling out for shitty Chinese food.

I met my guy, and my whole life has turned in a new direction; after several failed relationships, I thought I would spend my life living with dogs in Arizona alone. Then he popped into my life, and things have just shot upwards. Been with him for about 7 months, and I feel so good, so one with the universe.

There is someone out there for you, man. You're still young. Go out, socialize, meet as many people as you can, friends, friends of friends, etc. It's hard, yeah, but it's so worth it.

Best of luck- getting stabbed in the heart is such a terrible pain, but don't let it linger and eat away at you.

OMG it just took a turn!

Well we have spoke of the matter. Turns out there isnt another man
She tells me that because we have been in a somewhat long distant relationship that she is scared for the future and doesnt want to give out her heart because many men have cheated and left her in the past. Ive also heard alot about her past and know that she was faithful to all of them

And we havent moved fast at all. Its been about 6 months and we havent even had sex and I dont want to unless I feel she is the kind of woman that I could love forever. Yes im that kind of person.

God, I want to take this chance.

Well there ya go dude,see you gotta stay positive. Negative people atract negative energy man.

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Originally Posted by Ub3rB0ng

Well there ya go dude,see you gotta stay positive. Negative people atract negative energy man.

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Amen brother!

a little faith and some positive thinking can take you a long way, glad everything is working out for you so far. I guess I'm the exact opposite of you though, I've been through too many relationships and have been screwed over in just about every way imaginable that right now I just want to be left alone and do things my way until I finally feel I'm ready to play the relationship game again.

Why love is not real.

The answer to that question is both simple and complex, as I will detail hereafter. Come the end of this document, if you are not a total moron, you will understand how love, and, in fact, all emotion, is simply the result of chemicals affecting the neurons in your brain.

To better understand the argument against relationships, we will examine the topic from a variety of standpoints and conditions. First, lets take a look at exactly what an emotion is. For those of you who aren't familiar with human anatomy, the tofu-like organ in your head is known as the brain. The brain is composed of trillions of cells known as neurons. Remember, neurons are
responsible for carrying signals from your body to the brain, and communication within the brain; every thought, movement, and blink comes from these little guys. Anyway, each neuron consists of four parts: dendrites, the soma, axons, and the axon terminals. In the case of an emotional response, the tree-root structure of a dendrite will receive a chemical signal from other attached neurons in the amygdala. It will then pass these signals to the soma (main neuron cell body) where it will decide what type of message to pass on. It will trigger an electrical event known as
the action potential, which will continue on to the axon, and eventually to the axon terminal. Just before the impulse reaches the axon terminal, tiny sacs, known as vesicles, secrete a neurotransmitter. Again, when referring to emotions, the transmitter chemical will likely be serotonin or dopamine. Just after the release, the action potential will cease (resetting the
neuron's charge), and travel into the synaptic gap. Immediately following entry into a synapse, the chemical will connect to another neuron (via the dendrites) and will either inhibit or excite it. Eventually (within a millisecond), the body will interpret this as a good or bad feeling.

Now that you understand basic brain anatomy and function, you can accept that emotions (including love and hate) are nothing more than chemical reactions. We will now look at the issue from a more sociable point of view. As I stated earlier, two people will create an attraction when they mirror these feelings in the presence of each other. This presence, however desirable, is based on misconceptions and lies at an alarming 100% rate. Yes, in every situation I've examined, I have found some degree of deception between the two "lovers." Is this what we're coming to? We're essentially lying to our brains for pleasurable feelings - you might as well go out
and do drugs. Tell me, can anyone reading this honestly say that they truly know the person they claim to love? The answer is no. People are creatures of convenience, and will lie when they need to. For example, the endorphines released by your body when it is experiencing pleasure (remember that this feeling comes primarily from serotonin and dopamine) are actually hundreds
of times more addictive than any street drug you can get your hands on. Have you ever seen what a crack addict will do to keep receiving the drug? People who think they are "in love" are no different. They will lie, and occasionally behave in violent ways to continue feeling the pleasurable
effects derived from interaction related to this chemically induced euphoria.

What did you think those "warm fuzzy" feelings were caused by? True love? Life-long happiness? Think again. Drugs - opiate like chemicals secreted by your body in response to this chemical stimulation So, since we've taken the "magic" out of your feeling, lets devalue it even more.

How many times have you lied to your "other half"? Said you were going somewhere else, when you weren't. How about exchanged pictures or engaged in inappropriate chat with others on the Internet/telephone/mail. Have you ever had inappropriate thoughts about someone else?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, did you immediately inform your "partner"? If not, you have no business engaging in an organized relationship. Truth is, if this describes you, you don't actually love the individual. You are, in fact, addicted to the pleasurable feelings that your brain so kindly creates when you are associating with them in an emotionally intimate way. The fact of the matter is that none of you people can honestly say you love someone outside of your family, simply because you've all done at least one of the things I mentioned earlier - which is exactly why I said it. Unfortunately, you all will probably continue your lying, deceptive ways.
Addicts.
Thanks for playing

@THContent

Everything we do is a simple matter of firing neurons and hormone secretions. You touch and hold a small puppy, and thus, chemical cocktails indicate a feeling of happiness, love, and "fuzzy wuzzies." Does breaking this action down to specific set of chemicals and neuron firings make the experience any less real or enjoyable?

Our unconscious mind creates all of these reactions, and doesn't make it obvious for a reason- we'd have to spend every minute of every day aware of these secretions and firings, and it would interrupt any behavior we needed for basic survival, let alone living enjoyably. The separation of the conscious mind from the subconscious is a VERY interesting and necessary arrangement.

Analysis of women through their monthly cycle indicates that women tend to go for stronger, virile men while ovulating to ensure healthy sperm, good genetics, and a high chance of infant survival. While women are not ovulating, they tend to prefer men with softer, more nurturing features to ensure a good mate that will stick around, care for her and the child, and provide a loving atmosphere.

While these studies are fascinating and undoubtedly important for understanding humans and our environment as a whole, it should not and cannot be a strict standard of rules regarding why we do what we do.

Love is complex, and hormones- though they do play a very important role- do not have a complete monopoly on love. They seem to be a loose set of indicators of preferences that a person has towards a mate. When a woman finds a man who has a lot in common and who fits her idea of attraction- physical, emotional, sexual, etc.- then the hormones give her a sort of subconscious indicator that she should remain with him. Love isn't a black and white issue of "it's just hormones and neurons, so it's not real"; rather we should look at love through many different angles- not only physical, but sociologically, psychologically, neurologically, sexually, etc.

One could get into a VERY long-winded and philosophical/psychological discussion, debating if sensation and perception of objects prove the existence of matter, or if it's just a mass hallucination. Experiencing an object, feeling, event, etc. automatically makes it "real" in a sense because your mind and body perceive it.

I've been married for almost 30 years and my wife still gives me a buzz. :D

I had a buzz for thirty years...:thumbsup:...then, it went to fizzle...:stoned:

I dont really care if love is real or not. All I know is I never want to live without the feeling and I would rather die than to be without it

This shit is really wearing me down guys. Pray for me

Aloha P. B.

"Everything we do is a simple matter of firing neurons and hormone secretions. You touch and hold a small puppy, and thus, chemical cocktails indicate a feeling of happiness, love, and "fuzzy wuzzies." Does breaking this action down to specific set of chemicals and neuron firings make the experience any less real or enjoyable?"

Very well said!


The fact that Pheremones are the major trigger of this sequence also does not impoverish that which we label, love.

In light of this, I do not believe in "love at first sight"

I have, however personally, experienced overwhelming attraction at first scent.
So powerful, that nothing else mattered!
For 22 years of my life, I was "led around by my nose" but that's a very long story.

Suggest that you research human pheremones.

It's worth the effort.

Alo Ha

Weezard

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Originally Posted by zeitgeist

I dont really care if love is real or not. All I know is I never want to live without the feeling and I would rather die than to be without it

This shit is really wearing me down guys. Pray for me

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No.

What I will do, is remind you, that may not be in full control of your situation, but only YOU determine how it affects you.

Jus' think on that for a while.

Humor me.

Aloha nui.
Weezard

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Originally Posted by Weezard

For 22 years of my life, I was "led around by my nose" but that's a very long story.

Suggest that you research human pheremones.

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Do pheremones smell like bacon?

'Cause the smell of bacon turns me into a single minded zombie following the aroma trail to the source despite all obstacles . . . just saying. :smokin:

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Originally Posted by Juggnoxalo

a little faith and some positive thinking can take you a long way, glad everything is working out for you so far. I guess I'm the exact opposite of you though, I've been through too many relationships and have been screwed over in just about every way imaginable that right now I just want to be left alone and do things my way until I finally feel I'm ready to play the relationship game again.

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I feel ya... i'm in the EXACT same position right now.