Another anxiety post

Over the past 4 months, I've recently had a huge surge of anxiety attacks, related to a recurrence of my generalized anxiety disorder, unprovoked, and mutually exclusive of my chronic pain. I saw a psychiatrist today, who prescribed Abilify until the next session in two weeks. I've been an absolute emotional wreck today, with no period of cessation between anxiety attacks, and a panic attack.

I know looking for a quick fix-it-all is very unreasonable, but I just need something, whether it's a session of cognitive behavioral therapy, or anything, to just be close to functioning. I can't work like this, and finals are looming next week. I don't want to be one of "those" patients who severely depend on the constant assurance of their therapist, but it's really, really affecting me. I'm not experiencing any major depression or suicide thoughts, but I can't sleep, every single noise just sets me off, and I'm not sure what to do?

Was there any recent change in your life that could account for this?

I don't want to sound like one of "those" people that immediately recommend methods like yoga, meditation, etc., to help relieve your anxiety symptoms, but have you ever given much thought to aromatherapy?

I know, I know... it sounds flaky, especially for an ailment as debilitating as acute anxiety, but it has worked for me in the past. I've found that most pharmaceutical treatments either left me a) restless, or b) in a complete stupor, and aside from cannabis I haven't had a whole lot of luck with medicine. I'm definitely not recommending you stop taking whatever your doctor prescribed you, but you could think of some alternative treatments along with them. If you're not fond of incense or aromatic candles, you might consider oils, bath salts, and the like that can be used in a therapeutic setting. Lavender, frankincense, and sandalwood are all very relaxing to me, and usually promote a good night's sleep... which can really make a difference in your stress levels. Just something to consider.

Good luck with your finals. :jointsmile:

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Originally Posted by Coelho

Was there any recent change in your life that could account for this?

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No, not that I can think of. I've had GAD since I was 16, but this is a sudden recurrence that rivals any other anxiety I've had in severity. I can't sleep, eat, concentrate, all day is just anxiety, all I feel is that stomach tightness, and adrenaline rushes through my limbs. I want to just jump out of my skin, it's so bad.

Mr. C-
Aromatherapy has been part of my regime for a while now, I use lavender and sandalwood for sleep, citrus and ginger to help me wake up, and I drink a good amount of chamomile. It had helped me some in the past, but absolutely nothing helps it now. I want to stay away from meds as much as humanly possible. I want to find out what the cause of my anxiety is, it's not genetic. I have a very safe home, and a family which is supportive enough.

When I talked to the psychiatrist, he initially asked me how anxious I was feeling, on a scale of 1-10, 10 is the most. I answered 7-8, and he had a shocked look on his face. I had been sitting there, cool as a cucumber, no fidgeting, no tapping, nothing. I've been told by many that I am extremely good at hiding my emotions, simply because I know that anxiety is looked down upon, and I work with nurses whose primary response to a psych case, even mild is "Oh great, here comes another crazy..."

The only marked emotion I've shown was during a few panic attacks I've had recently. I was alone, but I was physically trembling, heart POUNDING, crying, all kinds of awful thoughts running through my head. I just feel like I'm out of options. I want my life back.

My diagnosis for some background. 30 something male. Brain Injury as a teenager (hit my head on a playground chasing my nieces). Heart Attack mid twenties due to un-diagnosed diabetes. Epilepsy due to brain injury. Anxiety and Insomnia developed after heart attack. My anxiety is completely irrational and not related to specific situations. I played the pharmaceutical game for about a decade and never truly had control of the anxiety.
I know we are all different and have different needs, however I thought I would share what treatment is currently at least making me functional.
I use a combination of Reiki, Prayer, cannabis, valerian, chamomile and excercise to manage my anxiety. I do also have a script for seroquel 100mg as needed for anxiety/insomnia ( I only use this when cannabis is not available).

I hope this finds you well and in good spirits.

Namaste

Simply talking with this doctor helped me feel much better... I ended up waking up on my back porch last night, and my panic attacks have been intensifying. I saw him on Wed, would it seem too needy if I called him tomorrow to reschedule a sooner date? He wanted to try Abilify as a possible treatment, but I don't think it's feasible to wait for the two weeks for it to kick in if it's progressing this badly.

If simply talking to this doctor helps, give him a call.

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Originally Posted by epilepticme

If simply talking to this doctor helps, give him a call.

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Indeed! After all, he is paid (and probably well paid) to help you, so you have every right to call him whenever you need to.

Also, if talking to him alleviated you, it seems your problem is more psychological than biochemical.

I called him today, he got back to me in the evening, and unfortunately he's booked solid until next Wednesday... Shit. I'll try to get through this week, but it's going to be rough- Final exam week. Shit.

Well, I've made it through this week so far... I had a job interview yesterday, and I'm sooo thankful we sat outside... The program coordinator was such a nice guy, VERY hot with beautiful dreadlocks. It was the first time I've been able to leave the house in many days. I have a final exam today, and a job evaluation on Friday, so once those two are gone, it might be a bit easier to relax; I haven't slept in 3 days, and before that, very spotty sleep.

I think I might know what's bothering me... I'm getting ready to transfer to a university, one that's in an area I am VERY VERY familiar with, it would involve commute. I shouldn't be anxious at all, but I think back to the time when I was a freshman at an out of state school- the same thing happened, though, to a lesser extent.

On the outside, I don't really feel nervous about going to this new school; I want to finally finish my degree, but I think maybe internally, I fear I'm going to fail as badly as I did the first time. I'm definitely daunted by all of the more logical courses I have to take (FOUR chemistries, two calculus classes, and two physics) because I have dyscalclia, and numbers alone just really frustrate me.

I think I have a lot of things to uncover; I hide practically all of my emotions and interests from my family for fear of embarrassment; I have dozens of books on Richard Feynman, Milton Erickson, and for some reason, it would embarrass me if they found out. When I have a boyfriend, I am practically unable to show emotion, either love or excitement because my family's never really seen me express those feelings, and they would think it's odd. I don't know. There are just so many factors influencing each other, and I just want to get them straightened out because it's so frustrating.

Changing jobs, living situations, schools etc. are all very natural things to have anxiety about. Though sometimes us folks that suffer from anxiety exasperate those feelings in to an unhealthy state of anxiety.
I can only offer compassion and empathy in regards to that.
I can however offer some insight that can hopefully help you along your way a bit. Never fear who you really are. Never hide, you are special in your uniqueness. If the people around you are not comfortable with who you are then I would say it is time to look for some who are. If you have a hard time showing those emoticons it may be because no one ever showed you how and that seems to be the case with your family. Find some people that share your interests, share your joy or love or grief. When you can honestly share yourself with others you can gain great inner strength.
Good luck with the finals :)

Namaste

Well seeing as I too live in MD and too are in college and too taking finals, got my last 2 today, f'ing sociology and hist. of western architecture...yay.... but just do what I do, get as high as possible before hand....Not to just sound like a stoner, but when I sit there and worry about whats going down and what happens if I do badly on the finals, I fuck up. Go with your gut on tests, your subconscious does you better than you think when it comes to testing. Also, it calms me down so I'm not jumpy. And shit, if you go to AACC and wanna smoke some before 12:30 I'll be at the careers building just look for a kid with a tyedye bandanna on.

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Originally Posted by Purple Banana

I'm definitely daunted by all of the more logical courses I have to take (FOUR chemistries, two calculus classes, and two physics) because I have dyscalclia, and numbers alone just really frustrate me.

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Dont worry about this... this subjects hardly needs any numeric calculations at all... in fact, in this subjects there are far more letters (and greek letters) than numbers, so you will even get happy when you see an old number lost among this subjects... ;)

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Originally Posted by Purple Banana

I think I have a lot of things to uncover; I hide practically all of my emotions and interests from my family for fear of embarrassment; I have dozens of books on Richard Feynman, Milton Erickson, and for some reason, it would embarrass me if they found out. When I have a boyfriend, I am practically unable to show emotion, either love or excitement because my family's never really seen me express those feelings, and they would think it's odd. I don't know. There are just so many factors influencing each other, and I just want to get them straightened out because it's so frustrating.

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Man... im pretty like this... but im not embarassed that my family know my interests... i hide myself from them (or from anyone else for this matter) because i feel that being "known" makes me more predictable, and thus more vulnerable, while being "mysterious" and "unknown" makes me less predictable and thus less vulnerable...
And after years of hiding my emotions i reached a point where i dont feel them anymore. Im impassible, both internally and externally at most situations... i wont say its good, but also it isnt bad. Its neutral. But as i was way more sensitive to the bad emotions than to the good ones, for me being "neutral" is an improvement, even if its a bit boring sometimes...

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Originally Posted by ForgetClassC

Well seeing as I too live in MD and too are in college and too taking finals, got my last 2 today, f'ing sociology and hist. of western architecture...yay.... but just do what I do, get as high as possible before hand....Not to just sound like a stoner, but when I sit there and worry about whats going down and what happens if I do badly on the finals, I fuck up. Go with your gut on tests, your subconscious does you better than you think when it comes to testing. Also, it calms me down so I'm not jumpy. And shit, if you go to AACC and wanna smoke some before 12:30 I'll be at the careers building just look for a kid with a tyedye bandanna on.

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I was actually in AA the other day, for a job interview in Annapolis... I'm transferring from Harford CC to Towson...

Smoking does help with my anxiety a lot, but even the smallest and simplest equations sober are completely baffling, let alone stoned. I can do biology and English and art completely stoned, and it comes out perfectly. Nothing like learning about evaporative transpiration while stoned :)

I took my chemistry final today, and I completely bombed it, and failed the course. I drove home completely distraught, a million things running through my head wondering what to do, how to tell my parents, how to deal with the fact that I've taken chem 4 times, and still have not been able to pass it.

I went home, sat in my fuzzy blue half-moon chair, just closed my eyes, and spent the next 40 minutes in an odd state; my body was completely asleep and relaxed, but my mind just kind of wandered around, and somehow when I came to, everything seemed like it would be fine, as far as chem goes, at least. I'll get through school eventually, if it takes a while, so be it. One day at a time.

I really really hope I get the job though. I'll be working for the state Dept. of Natural resources, working with kids 14-17 from Baltimore who've had previous incarcerations, drug abuse issues, bad neighborhoods, etc. and I'll be supervising and mentoring them while hiking, camping, kayaking, canoeing, etc. I just hope to be rid of these panic attacks, social anxiety and all by then. One day at a time...

i know when i puff purple bannana it fuckks me up i get all super noided about dumb ass shit not paranoid but all nervous ans scared feeling and i dont want to go outside and shit


just a thought

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Originally Posted by phatsesh101

i know when i puff purple bannana it fuckks me up i get all super noided about dumb ass shit not paranoid but all nervous ans scared feeling and i dont want to go outside and shit


just a thought

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That sucks- my younger sister is like that sometimes. I've never, in my 6+ years of smoking had any problems with bud actually causing me anxiety, or even paranoia...

Yeah, I'm pretty sure I bombed my soc test, but fuck it, I'm an architecture major, lol

Itâ??s normal to worry and feel tense or scared when under pressure or facing a stressful situation. Anxiety is the bodyâ??s natural response to danger, an automatic alarm that goes off when we feel threatened.

Although it may be unpleasant, anxiety isnâ??t always a bad thing. In fact, anxiety can help us stay alert and focused, spur us to action, and motivate us to solve problems. But when anxiety is constant or overwhelming, when it interferes with your relationships and activitiesâ??thatâ??s when youâ??ve crossed the line from normal anxiety into the territory of anxiety disorders.

Man I feel ya... In fact since I started smoking this 4/20, I have had quite a number of bad trips and very very anxious ones too, I would not categorize them as PANIC ATTACKS, since that would be the severe ones, but I have been getting the cold and sweaty palms, fingers and toes for extended hours even after a small bowl of some nasty mexicans!!! very very odd to me and according to my smoking history.

However, I have since looked for some more professional help and have figured these feelings are only feelings of anxiety which do not technically harm u at the time of happening any more than making u feel very uncomfortable, but that's it, i know the impending doom feeling and how that flies... and its just it, A FEELING. The reason would be that blood flow to your brain will be restricted somewhat when u smoke and the stronger THC content the more this restriction so far as i have found out, plz correct me if any1 has more reliable info (I talked to my doctor and went for at least 10 sessions of therapy - i do have other problems generally tied to anxiety)

I was given these papers that HAVE REALLY HELPED me to COPE with my weed-induced (it differs for me from when i have a genuine excuse to be anxious) anxiety and I've been able to basically kick it's butt in most of the occasions rather quickly since I learned these techniques. However, yesterday I had a near panic-attack (fast racing heart, arrhythmia) episode that I could not take care of with any kind of thinking or statements!!!

Well, enough to say 20 minutes of juggin n mild running + some Borage tea did a miracle! (trust me, it makes your kidneys and toilet flush work rather hard & fast!!! took all those nasty anxiety-related chemicals out of the body along with the stress that gets released due to muscles exercising)

but generally speaking, my issue with anxiety is mainly with weed, that's what triggers it most of the time. in fact b4 i got help and even a few occasions afterwards, just thinking about smoking or thinking about getting some weed would make paranoid as hell when i was completely sober! but i know if i continue working on my psyche, i can easily overcome this, I did not have adverse reactions for the first few years of smoking, in which i was smoking far far far more than i do now (a few blunts, sometimes up to an ounce of low Q weed vs. max 3-4 small bowls a day) and i only started having panic attacks and anxiety that had to do with weed, after i took a very long sobriety break and got quite serious about my life, future and school!

But here they are, the statements that help me on a day to day basis, maybe others can get somethin out of these as well. CHECK ATTACHMENTS

EDIT: I use the first aid the most, and out of all its suggestions (different ones work for different ppl) the GET BUSY, BREATHE & RELAX, and GET MAD ones work rather good if the anxiety feeling is not too servere. but u might find the rest of them useful for u.

2nd EDIT: In fact when I talk about getting serious about life, I'm talking about turning a <1.0 GPA to a 3.4, and keeping on with getting str8 A's
and my major is accounting/finance, I happen to be a sharp learner in class and a very effective crammer as well. of course memory wise stoners do suffer a bit on the short term, but so long as my long term is working fine, i will assume i'm on a prescription that has the similar side-effect on the memory... sometimes even for me who is trying to stay sober, weed again becomes a need, a route to take in free time just to let the mind wander, but sometimes i find me in the middle of a scary and dark forest all of a sudden and it ruins my stroll in the highland!

Hey purple and flyingimam, I really feel you also. I have anxiety and worry about stupid things every day. I'll have a look at those papers to, I think I might have seen them before somewhere.

First time I smoked, didn't expect the high to be like it was but I was alone... felts like being in another dimension or outside of my body lol... it was quite scary but I wouldn't say that I panicked or anything.

Smoked several times for couple months after that without any problem, but then I started worrying about my heart condition which made me anxious while high. I have MVP and aorta regurgitation but only knew about the MVP then...

Few months later I started being cautious about getting "too high" but was totally fine with smoking small amounts without any problem. Then I got "too high" again and was really anxious, became afraid to smoke at all, but still wanted to. I was fine around weed and other people smoking it...

About... 10 (shit I didn't think it was that long) months ago I had a panic attack after vaporizing more then i expected, ended calling ambulance because my heart rate was at 200 and i was totally pale, trembling (which now I believe was a lot to do with low blood sugar)...

Couple months later, I slowly started getting paranoid that I would get weed in baked foods, had a panic attack sober for the first time and got depersonalization for 2 days, then I was paranoid about getting it in everything I ate and every time I ate i would be moderately anxious for 2-3 hours after until I was "certain there was nothing in it". Cant even stand near anyone smoking, can't smell weed without being anxious. I'm terrified to get high... from anything (alcohol included). Anytime I "feel weird" due to anything... lack of sleep, blood sugar, etc. I start getting anxious thinking I somehow got weed.

I've been like this for about 4-6 months as well as other things have started worrying me now I and I get anxious over things that never used to bother me.

The last month I have become much better. :) I've started changing my thoughts more rationally, eating healthier (but still not enough), taking some homeopathic remedies, doing some NLP, worrying less. I only get anxious a couple times a week (opposed to several times a day) I almost don't worry about getting drugs in food anymore, only sometimes, and worry less when I "feel weird" for w.e reason. But I'm still terrified to get high. Hopefully I won't fear it anymore because the herb used to help me with other things like eating before and I used to enjoy it. I know I'll be anxious free eventually.

I can't really say what has helped, but I know that changing the way you think about anxiety is a big thing. Basically you must accept it and stop fearing it/letting it bother you. Embrace the feelings. Like right now and today I feel sort "high" or just out of it, but I just think "oh well" because it's just a state of mind and feelings. My recommendation is to look into homeopathic remedies, EFT, and NLP for anxiety/panic. I've found these videos to be quite helpful:

Watch all 9part in order, one of the parts has a VERY effective anti anxiety technique that works within seconds.
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AaO4fV87x7Q&feature=related[/YOUTUBE]

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ArtxNt606U[/YOUTUBE]

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_DG8WkdIzSk[/YOUTUBE]

This acupressure point has helped me with mild anxiety sometimes, calm you a little (might be placebo but I duno, seems to work)
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZTHjjGtuDA&feature=related[/YOUTUBE]

Hope they help.:thumbsup:

Yeah, weed has never given me anxiety before. It only helps with anxiety a small amount, no matter how much I smoke.

As posted in another post, hypnosis has definitely helped me; I see my psych tomorrow and expect another session. Wish me luck! And thanks for all the helpful links and all, I really appreciate it :)