Should I find her?

Well, this will be my last thread, cause I need to get some shit done..haha

although, I am dating now, and one has told she loves me and wants to get serious...I cant stop thinking about the one that got away..
I know you all have heard the story of the girl that you cant get out of your head...you dream about...well, I have one of those...
When I was seperated from my wife about 6 years ago...I was with this girl for 2 years...I loved her more than anything...the sex was great...we would take weekend trips to New York, seattle, san diego, san Fran, Boston etc.etc....ride our bikes on the beach, amusement parks...all kinds of stuff..all while holding hands, kissing and being in love....but there was one thing that was bad...can you guess what? fighting...we would fight like you cant believe...then one time we were fighting and both of us said some stuff that
was very mean and hurtful and either of us could get over it...it was horrible...eventually I moved out...then we were trying to get back together, but it didnt happen...the very last thing that we said to each other was....later on in life...if we are both single...can we try this again? and we both said yes...and now I am single....I have no clue where she is, but I am sure I could find her..I am thinking she is in San Diego..the last place we where together....sorry for the long post..should I find her and talk to her?

I don't know.
Maybe, maybe not. MAybe just to give it some closure.
As for the one who has already dropped the l-bomb... I hope you guys have been spending a LOT of time together... in my experience, saying you want to get serious kinda comes BEFORE the l-word gets dropped on the table.

sounds too romantic to me, i say go for it! ooohh reunited love.

i had two of them actually... one i wanted to be with and one i wanted to tell how sorry i was for being a total lying dick...

i found both.... i suggest you do the same, even if yal don't get together... i know i would have never been able to rest if i hadn't found 'em.... just the torture of wondering where they are and what they're doing is enough...

hehe I know whatcha mean.. I got one, and we never even dated.. weve always just been friends, but I cant help but be in love with her. She has a boyfriend though, the same one shes had the whole time Ive known her. I will never tell her how I feel, and we will never end up together (Unless I get drunk and write an email I cant take back which Ive almost done a few times.. lol). So she will be the woman I will always regret not being with, but will always hope shes at least happy lol. I even dream about her... which is wierd because I DONT DREAM. The dreams are always fleeting upon waking but I always know when it was about her because I cant get her out of my head for the whole day. Meh.. not sure why I wrote that lol but there it is. She is my Artemis.. my goddess of the hunt. Now if I ever find my Athena.. then fuck its all over. I love violent warrior women lol.

I would say contact her and get to know her long distance to see if you think you two will still be combatative with each other. Fighting blows (between couples anyways). If you decide to do it, good luck!!

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Originally Posted by GraziLovesMary

hehe I know whatcha mean.. I got one, and we never even dated.. weve always just been friends, but I cant help but be in love with her. She has a boyfriend though, the same one shes had the whole time Ive known her. I will never tell her how I feel, and we will never end up together (Unless I get drunk and write an email I cant take back which Ive almost done a few times.. lol). So she will be the woman I will always regret not being with, but will always hope shes at least happy lol. I even dream about her... which is wierd because I DONT DREAM. The dreams are always fleeting upon waking but I always know when it was about her because I cant get her out of my head for the whole day. Meh.. not sure why I wrote that lol but there it is. She is my Artemis.. my goddess of the hunt. Now if I ever find my Athena.. then fuck its all over. I love violent warrior women lol.

I would say contact her and get to know her long distance to see if you think you two will still be combatative with each other. Fighting blows (between couples anyways). If you decide to do it, good luck!!

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Awwww....that's so sad.... forbidden love....

I acutally put a little thought into this -- after my late lunch break joint of course -- and I would say that you should try and contact her just to talk and catch up because I know how frustrating it can be when your wondering where someone is, and what they are doing, and if they ever think of you too and all of that jazz. But in the end you might just get more hurt if you persue a relationship with her. I once was with a guy who I fought allll the time with, and I thought that after a few months - about 6 things would have calmed down - and boy was a I wrong after I found him and had a long distance relationship with him the fighting just got worse and worse. I saw him recently for a dinner wen he came up here to visit everyone, and although its pretty clear we still love each other (becuase I swear love doesnt ever go away ) I'm glad we arent goign to get back together, because once a problem in a relationship always a problem. (unless you realllyyyy want it to change, and both of you are going to need to change)

Im young and confused about relationships as you know so it might not be good advice at all, just my thoughts.

Geo....ABSOLUTELY!! What are you thinking? If she's not available then fine.....but don't sit here and ask us....GO DO IT!!!

EDIT....sorry....what would you do about the woman you are dating now?

Ok, after reading the entire thing here's what I think.

One....stop using the woman you're dating now as a crucifix against being alone. It's not fair to her and it will keep you from growing. Neato that she loves you.....you obviously don't love her. Nuff said there.

Yes, I would try and contact this other woman AFTER you have straightened your own relationships issues out.....not before. Maybe she has moved on....maybe not. You don't know until you look around and ask.

Sounds to me like you need to get to know yourself first......try some silence.

Good Luck Geo. ;)

You should find her and cover her in chocolate and then leave again LOL.

Does she smoke?

go for it if you can start anew without judging the past
put your energy on the harmonious future with her

You shoult totally find her, life is lived better w/o regrets.

Ahhhh maaan my "romantic comedy with meg ryan" sense is burning off the charts right now!

lol but seriously, if you think this is something thats a real possibility then go with whatever feels right to you

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Originally Posted by DarkHairedSativa

Awwww....that's so sad.... forbidden love....

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Such is life and love and the nature of things. :-\

I would rather have known her and missed out than to have never known her at all. Much like all the people I love. I fall in love way to easily lol. Thats probably why I am staying away from relationships... Ive fallen in love with all women at this point and... fuck I dont even know lol

^You sure it's love grazi??? Cause im the same way. Maybe it's infatuation....or that we like the way they make us feel...maybe strong feelings, even. but real love??? i've never felt that...

and yea geo.....if she's worth it....then, you both deserve it. find her.

I have one of those, a guy in my case. I've been married for 15 years and he left me several times but came back, plus I took him back. Last separation I met someone awesome... but I let him down because I went back with my husband in an instant. It has been about six years now, I do keep in touch with him and see him occasionally, but he has a girlfriend, he doesn't seem happy with her, but he stays with her. I'm separated once again, probably the last time and I can only think about the one I let go for the one I'm married to who is now dating everyone all over town and I'm left alone.

grazi... i was in the same boat... except i ended up sleeping with the married chick... heh

and OF COURSE you should.... why ask you? i'll tell you why. Because my life is only mildly entertaining, and i need to live vicariously through those around me. OH and, because you want to..

of course, i completely agree with "once a problem, always a problem"... so both of yall would have to change...

you could do what i have done in the almost exact situation, start back a relationship, get to know her, realize she hasn't changed, nor does she think she needs and/or wants to, still fuck her... AND get closure

remember, the fairy tale isn't that magical in real life

I didnt forget about this thread...I did send her an email 2 days ago to the last email address I had for her..shit, I was nervous is doing that..well see...it is still weak at best.

I didn't even reply to you on your original post, I just went on with my guy I let go, sorry.

It is hard to say. I find myself trying not to live in the past but to live for today. It is hard because I'm really sad right at this moment. I'm wondering if it is best to just let the past go especially if it didn't work.

But you seem so into this person, I guess it couldn't hurt to give it a shot. It also seems like you want to find someone really bad. I stay in contact with my guy, hoping he would call it quits with his current girlfriend, but I can't waste my life waiting and wishing that. He knows I'm separated from my husband again but doesnt trust that it is for good this time.

Hope things work out for you, the way you would like them to.

Yeah I had two also, one of them I found out really did like me too and I never took the chance.. However she's now happily married and I'm sure is doing well. So I'm happy for her.

The other one, I asked to a dance once and she turned it down, kinda... I found out later what she had tried to say is that she wanted to hang out sometimes but didnt want to go to a dance as they weren't really her thing and that she actually kinda liekd me to. Too bad one of her freinds decided to tell me this after graduation. (Why do you chicks have to make things so difficult?)... She was gorgeous and a really fun girl. I still wonder about her from time to time. I think all guys have that one that got away that still kinda haunts us from time to time.

i didnt even read the thread, but why are you looking for 'her??' all i needed to see was san diego...been there done that wonderful place in socal.

bro change your outlook to 'im looking for them' there are too many beautiful women (and girls, who will some day be womean) to tie yourself down. cut the fuckin strings homeboy!

its also better wondering what if.

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Originally Posted by trainwreck530

i didnt even read the thread, but why are you looking for 'her??' all i needed to see was san diego...been there done that wonderful place in socal.

bro change your outlook to 'im looking for them' there are too many beautiful women (and girls, who will some day be womean) to tie yourself down. cut the fuckin strings homeboy!

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Your right...totally right..I just dont need another relationship right now..

you should try to find her when you're ready....but don't expect things to be the same

You should stop and think what she will feel if you contact her. I was wearing the other shoe, so to speak. I was the one being sought by the man I love and have loved for 6 years despite not having contact for 3 years. He claimed to love me, but apparently it wasnt enough at the moment. We were great together.. never fought, GREAT SEX!!! intellectually.. everything. He broke my heart and I swore I would never go back to him, even though we did have sex once after we were broken up. I'm not over it but I got my Shit together and am trying to move on. He contacted me a while back but I refuse to see him. Every time I think of him, the time we spent together, my heart literally hurts. Its one of the worst feeling in the world. You wanna to give in so bad, but you know you couldnt survive another blow.... idk if that makes sense..

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Originally Posted by geonagual

Well, this will be my last thread

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:S2:

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Originally Posted by GraziLovesMary

hehe I know whatcha mean.. I got one, and we never even dated.. weve always just been friends, but I cant help but be in love with her. She has a boyfriend though, the same one shes had the whole time Ive known her. I will never tell her how I feel, and we will never end up together (Unless I get drunk and write an email I cant take back which Ive almost done a few times.. lol). So she will be the woman I will always regret not being with, but will always hope shes at least happy lol.

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Same boat bro, same boat. I'll say one thing: it is a damn good thing that there is a garbage can on the way to work - it's a handy place to put letters that probably shouldn't reach their destination.