So I was chilling with my mom this one time, and she's a really strange woman. She has this thing with those ceramic geese that you dress up for the seasons.
Anyway, it used to be a running gag with my friends that they'd steal it and return it a few days later in a different outfit...once it came back in a black hooded cape with eyeliner and a roach glued to its beak...
One day, the goose completely disappeared. Weeks passed and it never came back. Apparently my friend Curtis shot its head off with a B.B. gun and found it had a hollow neck and turned it into a bong. The head became his hood ornament.
Fast-foreward three years later. I'm having a drink with my mom and she goes, "So Kristie, whatever happened to my porch goose?"
I solemnly rise and get the envelope containing the pictures of the goosebong.
"Is that...oh my god, is that a BONG?"
"Yes, yes it is"
She said she'd never been prouder of me in my entire life and showed me her pipe. Then we smoked a bowl.
Like mother, like daughter...
