My dad is suing my mom.

I'm going to rant right now, because I'm uber pissed.

Here's some background.

On my main family: My mom and dad divorced when I was 10. I'm 17 and my brother is 20. My dad currently pays child support for both of us weekly, 200 dollars total. He still pays child support for my brother because he goes to college and will until my brother gets out. My dad was great before he left for the most part. My mom's never told me this straight up but she's always hinted drastically about steroid abuse. He became a gym fanatic, completely obsessed. He was also cheating on my mom two years prior to the seperation (which led to divorce). When I was 13, he remarried (don't get me started on that one..). For a few years after the divorce he was a good divorce dad, he saw me a few times a week and bought me endless amounts of crap. That soon tapered off to once a week, then a few times a month, then once a month until I was 14-15 when it became never. He ended all contact with me, not even holiday cards, phone calls, emails..nothing.

On my brother: My brother has always had symptoms of asperger's, which is basically a form of autism. He has problems in social situations and in keeping himself bathed, teeth brushed, clothes clean, ect. He is very picky with his eating, he literally eats maybe 5 foods even though my mom and I have always pushed him to try new things. He's a quiet kid, very intelligent but there's always been something..off about him. He was never diagnosed though, I think because of my mother's fear. He's very vulnerable, even at 20 years old.

All the while, my brother kept in contact with him, desperately trying to keep in touch with my father. Bad idea.

My dad is now suing my mother for basically, neglect. My brother lives at home 4 months out of the year during his summer and for about 10 days during winter break. He lives in Arizona for school the rest of the months. My dad is saying my mom doesn't provide him with adequate food and living environments. He's saying my mom hardly cooks and will only feed him boxed mac and cheese and when my brother eats something else it's from fast food resturaunts which he (my brother) pays for. After he complains that my mother should pay for the food, he then says that my mom's moral resposibility is to teach him how to pay for his own things by including him in the grocery bill. He also says that my brother's room is, in short, a shithole. With broken furniture and dirty beds. Which is true, but only because my brother CHOSES to live that way. My mom has offered him new beds, chairs, desks, ect. He turned them down. Among other things he basically is saying my mom is a bad parent, funny, coming from a man who hasn't seen his OTHER child (me) in 2-3 years. Yeah, he doesn't even mention the fact that he has TWO kids either. My mom has been nothing but amazing to both me and my brother and to see her on the verge of tears today has put me over the edge.

If I could have TWO minutes alone with that worthless piece of shit, I honestly think I'd strangle him. After many years of having no desire to even speak to him, I would LOVE to give him my two cents right now.

But I can't do that...why? Because he changes his number so much that I couldn't keep up with him.

Sorry everyone, I needed to rant to someone. Can anyone give me some advice or relate?

I can't give you advice, and I can't relate, but I can say that you WILL get through this, your family WILL get through it... The truth will come out when your brother tells his side of the story, or when his representative does... I hope he will at least agree to talk to someone who understands his condition and ease him through what is going to be tough for all of you.
Best wishes girle. Keep that lil chin up.

No need to say sorry to anyone on this forum about ranting, you go for it girl, you have every right to.
My mom abandoned me when I was six, now she wants to get in touch and it aint gonna happen.
You hang in there things do get better.

NCM

hang tough, life will always be a battle.

I'd be pissed, too, BFA. I hope that'll be the first thing you do is tell whoever hears that case, assuming it even gets as far as a courtroom, the actual facts that you've seen first-hand. I have this feeling that recounting your version of the story to some of the adult welfare organizations or in the early depositions, if it gets that far, will be key to blasting his baseless lawsuit out of the water. Your dad has a lot of nerve, especially when he hasn't even been around. You're a nice daughter/sister to be so supportive of your mom and brother!

keep your head up .. things will get better.. my next toke is to you, your mom, and your brother.. :jointsmile:

Thank you, everyone. I honestly appreciate it.

I highly doubt this case will last long. He didn't even have a lawyer write up the complaints and everything. He did it himself (it was written very unprofessionally as well). One of my best friend's dad is also a VERY good lawyer (not sure if he's a divorce lawyer yet) and I'm gonna try and see if he can help my mom at all (he's got a lil crush on my mommy too haha). I can't wait to see if I can testify against him though, he can't sue about MY situation because he has NO IDEA what it's like. Horrible fucking parent.

</end hatred> ;)

Only in america...

wow... thats fucked up... as bad as my dad... my dad filed a restraing order aginst my mom, saying that my brother and sister couldnt see my mom... that only reason why there wasnt one aginst me was because i live with my mom...

best of luck to you. my father tried pulling similar shit back in the day accusing my mother of not providing for me because i was anemic (iron deficiency) for a brief period of time. he tried using it in court against her. i can relate to your desire to strangle him. hang in there

just testify and be all you dont know whats up when do you come over sucka

damn girl hang in there, that situation is all kinds of messed up, I know guys like your brother though somtimes they can do the most suprising and amazing things.

BFA hun the only advice I can give you is stay strong, keep your head up and don't let this shit bring you down. Families tend to suck in general, the best you can do is try to get through it but don't let it fuck you up. If you can solve the problems you're facing, then try. If you can't then just remove yourself from the situation. Don't let it mess you up :p