How important is a firm handshake?

When I was 5 years old, eye contact was the first thing my dad taught me along with a firm handshake.

"you look a man in the eye, whether he is bigger or smaller than you. Stick out your hand into their space before they do. When you grab each others hand, make sure you are the one with the dominant hold. Look him in the eye and introduce yourself loud and clear."

I can't remember how many times people complimented my dad and I when I was young. Noone expects a five year old to shake your hand better than some 40 year old men.

I'll go to a party (coming from TEXAS, yall) and shake someones hand and I can tell.....with just a handshake what you are all about. I have met guys at parties for the first time and shook their hand and felt like I was holding an 80 year old womans hand.

If its especially weak, I'll even call someone I don't even know out. "Cmon, my grandmother is 80 and has a better handshake than that."

I have great respect for someone who can get the dominant hold in a handshake against me. Thats immediate respect where I come from. I'll buy you a fuckin beer if you can do that.

Also, I don't give a damn if I am with my south texas small town white folks or smokin a blunt with my FUBU friends. Black/White/Hispanic/Whatever.....I shake your hand just the same. Like a man. Theres only one way to do it.

1-10 its an 11.

I have snagged jobs with my handshake alone.

Very important IMO, for chicks too. It makes me think someone has substance. I hate spaghetti handshakes.

On the other hand, guys who grab your hand TOO hard make me think they are overcompensating for something else... wonder what THAT might be..,.

A firm handshake is something my old man always taught me when i was a wee' young 1. obviously eye contact to but it was more of the handshake. i hate it when i shake some ppls hands and they got the limp wrist going and not even trying to shake ur hand, then u feel bad for crushing there hand. dam pussies.

10

My dad taught me from a young age also that a firm handshake and for you to be the one to put your hand out first was key. But you can't always tell that much from a handshake. What if they have a bad hand? I recently cut 2 tendens in my pinky on glass:( its all healed but for a short time after my handshake was alittle weak not to menchin(sp?) because when i would shake someones hand there fingers where right where my cut is and that shit still hurts if you push on it to hard. I usually only give handshakes to ppl i don't know tho, so i'm sure they judge me from it because i judge them from theirs.

a frim handshake is important, and you can tell a lot about someone by it. but in my opinion trying to outsqueeze the other guy gives off the wrong impression.

and you're right, there is only ONE way to shake hands, all that other shit drives me bonkers. whenever im at a party or something and someone tries to give me some bullshit handshake i'll tell them right then and there to shake my hand like a man.

i think mines abit to rough! a good few people thought i was bout to break there hand when i was shaking it lol dunno i picked up a very tight handshake from switzerland

Oh well there is a difference between having the dominant position and squeezing too hard. Squeezing hard is only acceptable when beer is involved.

Hey blunts. One time I met my buddys great uncle. He was about 80 years old and used to bullride and bronc-ride. I went to shake his hand and grabbed his wrist. I looked down and he was missing his thumb. hehe. Very cool guy, says it happens all the time.

Though blunts, where I come from....lets say you go to a friend house and there are 4 people there you don't know. In my book you should immediately shake their hand and introduce yourself. I feel disrespected when I don't get a handshake sometimes. Don't jump over couches and whatnot, meet everyone in your immediate area. Even if it is 20 minutes later, it can be fixed by saying "hey, I didn't get your name. Im xxxxx" stick out your hand and all is forgiven.

IF U DONT GIVE A FIRM HANDSHAKE THEY WILL HATE U!

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Originally Posted by ValkyrieAg

Oh well there is a difference between having the dominant position and squeezing too hard. Squeezing hard is only acceptable when beer is involved.

Hey blunts. One time I met my buddys great uncle. He was about 80 years old and used to bullride and bronc-ride. I went to shake his hand and grabbed his wrist. I looked down and he was missing his thumb. hehe. Very cool guy, says it happens all the time.

Though blunts, where I come from....lets say you go to a friend house and there are 4 people there you don't know. In my book you should immediately shake their hand and introduce yourself. I feel disrespected when I don't get a handshake sometimes. Don't jump over couches and whatnot, meet everyone in your immediate area. Even if it is 20 minutes later, it can be fixed by saying "hey, I didn't get your name. Im xxxxx" stick out your hand and all is forgiven.

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hah man i think its a Texas thing bc everytime i walk into a party i gotta introduce myself and give em a handshake. I was in florida partying last year and tried to do the same thing, they looked at me like i had no head or something...oh well. Also i was a used car salesman for a year and a half, i could tell wether or not i was gonna sell you a car that day by your handshake.

I've always had a firm handshake - Got that from me old man. My cousin Geoff who is 13 years older than me has been hurt a few times by it - but he's hurt me back.

Yeah, i belive a strong handshake is important.

Matter of fact i saw a mate today that i haddnt seen since septemer 04, shook his hand and it was weaker than i expected, and hes just come back from a tour of duty with the paras - good to see him again though, i nearly didnt regonise him.

great post. remember to be firm, not Darth Vader death grip. i like to say 'how do you do' or 'pleased to meet you' when i shake hands. i was always taught to say 'pleased to meet you' and 'yes sir/ma'am'. people are always impressed when i break out the 'pleased to meet you, sir'.

I remember when my parents taught my brother and me how to shake hands "the right way". Now its a huge turn off for me when I meet someone with a weak grip. It bothers me more when women/girls have weak hand shakes because I feel like they're furthering the notion that girls are weak and dont stand up for themselves. I've hurt a few guys with my hand shake. Oh man the worst kind is when the person just kind of gives you their fingers and you dont really know what to do with them.

haha yeah the fingers. I forgot about that since i usually get up high on the hand, but I have been left with just fingers in the past. Pitiful. Like if I gave you a pipe wrench, your hand would break.

Whenever someone reaches out to shake my hand, I start taking of my pants.

Firm handshakes are fine and all, but to me it can be a little too uptight and formal in some settings. If I meet someone at a party or something, haha I'm not gonna shake their hand like I would at a job interview. Just a nice little waddup slap some skin or pound it whatever and move on.

Call me crazy, but I always kind of look twice at the people that give me a regular ole' handshake. It just doesn't look natural, or it looks funny, I'm not sure. ~

While i find a handshake respectful, i find the strength of the handshake trivial.

My dad taught me too but,,,it was always in a bar and i had to embarrassingly shake all these lushes hand with their beer breath...

They say using your second hand shows acceptance and makes the other person more comfortable...

I believe if you can approach someone and grasp their hand firmly, like you're convicted to them, then it is not what you learn from them, but what they learn of you that makes a good handshake. Impressions, if you will. A weak handshake would indicate unwillingness to grip another's hand, however, to show that you are not afraid to clench someone's hand as firmly as possible. A handshake like that demands respect and obedience; trust.

i believe a good handshake is important as well just because I have always done that and people take it more seriously....It can tell more about maturity and character in my opinion but thats just me

to me it doesn't matter, but i know it matters to other people (lol seems kinda ridiculous to care about to me.) so i always make sure it's firm.

I dont know if I could "hold a dominant handshake" with you, but my old man also taught me that eye contact and a firm handshake make a good first impression. Naturally, thats stuck with me my whole life and I also think that both are important.

dont really care,, the only time i shake somones hands is if im gettin a job or meetin somones fokes,, if its a friends then hand shakes feel too formal, no need for a "dominant hold", sounds like a weird sex position

some fuckin american i know did that to me... shook my hand like he was on steroids or somethin... i dont shake hands... im not the hand shaking type.. so when he shook my hand he nearly wrenched my arm off...

i didnt think any bigger of him, in fact it annoyed me alot... now if someone goes to shake my hand i'd rather shrug it off than have some little 'subconcious competition' with them...

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Originally Posted by Its a Plant

Firm handshakes are fine and all, but to me it can be a little too uptight and formal in some settings. If I meet someone at a party or something, haha I'm not gonna shake their hand like I would at a job interview. Just a nice little waddup slap some skin or pound it whatever and move on.

Call me crazy, but I always kind of look twice at the people that give me a regular ole' handshake. It just doesn't look natural, or it looks funny, I'm not sure. ~

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LOL, was waiting to see this response. I've been to hundreds of parties with hundreds of different people from when I was in high school to college, and it's more like slapping hands and locking fingers (still FIRMLY, but not very formal)...this is basically with people my age or younger. And of course with close friends..you're not going to give them a firm handshake to say 'Whaddup' lol. But, yeah...with anyone older, a nice firm handshake is in order.

And I agree, a firm handshake does look funny if done at an informal event with young adults.

I only shake hands for business.

Otherwise, it's some skin and a fist.

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Originally Posted by Abattoir Dream

some fuckin american i know did that to me... shook my hand like he was on steroids or somethin... i dont shake hands... im not the hand shaking type.. so when he shook my hand he nearly wrenched my arm off...

i didnt think any bigger of him, in fact it annoyed me alot... now if someone goes to shake my hand i'd rather shrug it off than have some little 'subconcious competition' with them...

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There's a big difference between firm and overbearing.

I think it's wrong to say that you can judge somebody by their handshake. In fact I'd go so far as to say that's bullshit, although I hope you're not too offended.. :p People are just too complex for that, dude..

Anyway nah I don't really think firm handshakes are that important, but I have a couple of friends who have the most weak-ass handshakes in the world, and it usually irritates me. :D

10 = a sign of substance / charecter .
Peace
Crispi :jointsmile:

Well the complexity of a handshake really isn't complex at all. Its not so much I judge a person, heck they probably are pretty good people if I the are a friend of a friend of mine.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't walk up to people in high school when I was younger and shake the death out of people. That isn't really natural.

But to me, if you can't look me in the eye and shake my hand like you have a single muscle (i know you do, everyone does). To me, that means that you are nervous that you don't have your daddy to hide behind or your momma to run underneath her sundress.

I think it deals alot of with age too. When you meet new people, you have to give respect to get it. I've met *alot* of $$$ people. Used to clean dove with Tommy Lee Jones....cleaned Mick Jagger's deer....met Rick Perry....shook 50+ peoples hands during an internship my freshmen year.

If you walk up to someone with substance and bring that weaksauce handshake, might as well not shake hands at all.

hahaha hide behind my dad... i dont even see my bastard dad...

if someone wants to test my strength, or if i wanted to test someone elses strength, i'd prefer to have a bare-knuckle boxing match with them than some dumb handshake, that way you really find out what someone is made of, if they are confident, they will smile, and accept, if not, they look shocked and decline.. thats like the handshake, then the actual match is like a further test, to see just how far you'll go...

bare knuckle boxin is the british way... handshakes are the american way hahaha...

Well this thread had nothing to do with comparing balls, but don't ever compare balls with a Texan. You'll lose everytime. A handshake is by no means a test of physical strength, but rather character.

Stud, I have never backed down in my life and never will. Whipped some asses, broke some beer bottles over heads, cracked some skulls, seen alot of blood, gotten my ass whipped by people who with BRANDS on em. Been on both ends.

And yes, I would look you straight in the eye, smile, and tell you to bring whatever your daddy taught ya. From the looks of your avatar, i'd put my foot in your ass. Probably even a little firmer than I would have given a handshake.

Oddly enough, a man with a frim handshake 9/10 will give you a smile and say bring it. I wouldn't expect a man with a weak ass handshake to be able to maintain a solid fist anyhow.

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Originally Posted by Abattoir Dream

hahaha hide behind my dad... i dont even see my bastard dad...

if someone wants to test my strength, or if i wanted to test someone elses strength, i'd prefer to have a bare-knuckle boxing match with them than some dumb handshake, that way you really find out what someone is made of, if they are confident, they will smile, and accept, if not, they look shocked and decline.. thats like the handshake, then the actual match is like a further test, to see just how far you'll go...

bare knuckle boxin is the british way... handshakes are the american way hahaha...

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It's always good to have a fight and end it with a pint of larger and a joint in the car on the way home.

[quote=ValkyrieAg]Well this thread had nothing to do with comparing balls, but don't ever compare balls with a Texan. You'll lose everytime. [QUOTE]

Yall hear the Texan in him talking?:wtf:

A good handshake is the establishment of respect.

haha just reppin' my state.

I had something good to say about handshakes when i clicked this thread and now i cant remember for shit. :( damn,

I think a firm handshake is a good thing, but it's a potentially tough issue for ladies, especially in business. Or at least it was for me. I worked with high-level corporate executives and so was often in circumstances where I was meeting, greeting, or making introductions. It just didn't feel right to me to reach over and do the strong-dominant grasp in the same way the men did. Yet I didn't want to appear a completely spineless, either. Just slightly gentler and more deferential, generally, because that was a large part of how I got things accomplished. The chairman and his various C-level cronies always thought I was deferential, but in truth I simply knew how to work the system and respond to their enormous corporate egos in ways that pleased them, got their attention without being threatening, and also got me what I wanted. I found a slightly firm, ladylike handshake worked well, ideally with well manicured hands.

firm handshake is important, but too firm isnt good

I like a good old wiener shake now and then...