Let me live in your closet!

Thanks, Lulu, I knew I could count on you. # 15 is the one I was talking about.

How long ago was this now? I mean it could be blown over or someone else could have gotten the boot for it.

I agree your signature makes no sence. Getting high can cause lots of drama...as for me im up for that challenge! ;)

I really liked your poems, MJM...I know where they came from ;)
You seem to have made the journey, but just in case you are still a little lost I would recommend that link that I posted in the reply above - even if it just affirms your own discovery. It is a peice of writing that I edited for a good friend of mine, who suffered as much as any woman I know :)

Res...

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Originally Posted by maryjanemama

Cheeched, like Ammie said, been there done that...in fact I was 17 at the time, too. Is he older than you? It sounds like he's using his postion in your life to control you...that is not love, that is ownership. You have to get him out of your life. End of story. You think you love him, but you know what, you've made him the center of your life and now you feel like you don't know what you'd do without him. Guess what? You can do plenty without him, you had a life before you met him and you will again afterwards.

I know how it feels to be really scared of someone. You think that staying is just easier because it keeps the peace for a while and you're out of danger. But you're not, the longer you stay, the worse it will get. Trust me on this. It sounds like he is trying to keep you from your friends, next it will be your family. This is the beginning of him trying to isolate you. Next will come the hitting, I promise you, he will hit you next. It may start with pushing or shoving or grabbing your arm...but soon it will lead to bruising, mark my words.

I would say definitely DO NOT tell him anything. Don't tell him about counseling, or that you're thinking of leaving him. You do not want to provoke him. When you've gotten some help, tell your friends and family that you are going to break up with him and do it. Do not do it by yourself. I know this sounds like a shitty way to break up with someone but I had to break up with my crazy ex over the phone! While he was away at boot camp. That way I knew he couldn't come and get me or whatever, cuz he would have if he was in town. Cheech, if I didn't break up with him when I did I garuantee I would be dead by now.

This post will turn into a novel if I tell you more but trust me, things will get worse if you stay. Don't listen to his bullshit, "I love yous." either, cuz that is all crappola. If he yells at you or hits you and then turns around and buys you a gift, don't accept it. Make a plan to get him out of your life and follow through with it. Make it a clean and simple break and do not see after it's over. Once it's over, keep it that way. Do not meet him "just to talk" or any of that. He will do everything he can to weasel his way back into your life. Be strong and don't let him near you.

I wrote a poem about how I felt when I was with him...but I don't remember which one it is. Lulu knows what it is, if she sees this, maybe she can put the link in here so you can read it and know that I understand exactly how you feel right now.

Keep in touch and I'll help you out however I can: [email protected]..

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god we must have had the same guy!!!

I'd let you live in my closet, but it's full of corpses.

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Originally Posted by apsinthion

At the rate your going you're either going to end up dead or in jail.:( It seem's like every day you're either stealing something, crashing a car, doing hard drug's, failing drug test's or getting threatend by ex-boyfriend's.

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drinking bleach man, dont forget the bleach. :)

yr young cheeched, he sounds like a high maintenance bitch. be rid of it.

stealings bullshit.

"HANNAH GT THE FUCK OUT OF THE CAR NOW GET THE FUCK OUT"

man if he treats girls like that he needs more then broken up with..that shit dont fly around here thats for sure..

^The first time he yelled at me...it really hurt me, after awhile I've built a wall around myself to any voice above the level of my own (And Ive purposely forgotten how to yell).

I just hope he'll change, he keeps saying hes going to do all this great stuff, but then he never does anything about it. He cant hold a job even for more then a month (if even that). And he says my success at my job is only because I am a girl. And I told him how I want to get my doctors degree in paleantology (Which would take 8 yrs, mind you) and he always is like "Great, now youre going to meet some other guy and fall in love with him" or hes like "Maybe we should just break up now" or tells me that when he gets into the army he'll go active so he'll only be around a month out of each year. And I wish he'd support me, because I have the GPA to get into that University and others...

He is really sweet though...I love how hes adventurous...like when we go fourwheeling and dirt biking...and he sk8 boards with me...I dunno...I love him, I put some much into the relationship I dont want to let everything go for nothing...

Im the only one in the relationship with a job (I give him money usually), Im the only one with a car (I always go to see him whereever he is, he never comes to me -- which does get on my nerves and hurts to a degree). He never calls me, because he doesnt have a house...he just bumps around from people to people...so its not like I can call him...but, he makes absolutely no effort to call me.

However, he is faithful to me...I do know that...and I do love him...and Ive given him so much...and taken so much out of me, I dont want to know that Ive done all of that...for nothing...

Thanks for the poem MJM...Im going to read it in 2.2

Cheeched,
I don't know you, nor have I made any effort to converse with you prior to this. But after reading these posts, I have a feeling I know the kind of guy you're stuck with. From the sounds of things, he needs to grow up and get a clue. He's transient, needy to a fault, and verbally abusive. No female should have to endure any of those things. It's understandable that it is a frightening prospect to lose him, not because of losing the actual person, but because of the void it will create in your life. But that void will fill, replaced by someone who has those qualitites that you find so enduring in him, and without those that are so painful.

By ending this relationship you will be doing yourself more good than you can imagine. You say you don't want to have put so much into a relationship just to let it go for nothing. No relationship is ever worthless, the lessons learned in failed relationships are far more valuable than those learned in healthy ones. Love is about give and take, and though he has taken so much from you, he has given you back life experience that will prove to be invaluable in the future.

I was trying to avoid another long post, so, leave him. Enroll in college, meet new people, move on. Let him join the Army, if they don't whip him into some sort of shape, he's a lost case. Don't contact him after you move on, don't allow him to contact you. Remove yourself from a situation that causes you so much pain. You're an extremely attractive and intelligent girl and you can do better. Hell, if I was a little younger and not married.....

Do not allow him to scar you any deeper than he has already. Much love and this toke's for you.

Peas out:D

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Originally Posted by Cheeched Chick HiGh

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He is really sweet though...I love how hes adventurous...like when we go fourwheeling and dirt biking...and he sk8 boards with me...I dunno...I love him, I put some much into the relationship I dont want to let everything go for nothing...

Im the only one in the relationship with a job (I give him money usually), Im the only one with a car (I always go to see him whereever he is, he never comes to me -- which does get on my nerves and hurts to a degree). He never calls me, because he doesnt have a house...he just bumps around from people to people...so its not like I can call him...but, he makes absolutely no effort to call me.

However, he is faithful to me...I do know that...and I do love him...and Ive given him so much...and taken so much out of me, I dont want to know that Ive done all of that...for nothing...

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Let "everything" go? What are you letting go. A damn mooch, who just uses you. WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I certainly hope you don't let this idiot talk you out of college. Leave him, or your life will be ruined eventually. That is what it comes down too. Everyone has choices. Every choice has consequences good and bad, it is a part of growing up. You need to make yours. Hopefully you make the right one and kick this bum to the street.