Quote:
Originally Posted by Skink
me neither...it's all good
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Skink
me neither...it's all good
Billion im cool my friend, about the drooling in the rubber room..LOL, i forgot to mention i tried to commit suicide a couple years back and actually did end up in that rubber room for a while.
:jointsmile:
tryna I would suggest that you try to forgive your uncle and cousin and fiance. I know it's easy to just say that to you from my keyboard, having never experienced a real tragedy in my life (although I'm only 16 and I assume that I have alot of living to do, even though i could stop breathing tomorrow). It's like you said though, by the time you want to get close to someone it might be too late. As far as the murder of you family, I don't see why, as an outsider looking in you have a reasonable reason to feel guilty, it wasn't your fault even though you might think it was. I hope everything works out and over time you'll be able to get over it.
that's all for tonight, see ya guys later.
I served in the Marines for over four years. I made it out to Afghanistan and other nice vacation spots, but I did have something tragic happen to me while I was overseas. I was a part of a training mission and we were firing rockets from shoulder fired rocket launchers. This was my job and I had fired about hundred of these rockets at this point. That night my rocket launcher blew up on my shoulder knocking me out momentarily. I woke up with gas burns all over my face and neck. The corpsmen had to pick pieces of shrapnel out of my face. I was very lucky. Five Marines in previous years had their heads completely removed from their shoulders while firing the same rocket launcher.
I have nightmares about this all the time. I usually have dreams of losing my head, and I often hear the sound of the explosion that I remember from that day.
That experience has profoundly affected my psyche.
Hey Devil Dawg, at least you got mary jane to comfort you now.Quote:
Originally Posted by SmokeyTokey
What rocket launcher was it? At4, dragon, LAW?
It was an 83mm SMAW, MK-153.
Hey 420,Quote:
Originally Posted by 420marijuana420
You know that thought really did go through my mind but as of yet they have made no effort to apologize to me. Yes I definitely would be the "better man" so to speak but they have to want to be forgiven as well, i feel, and that just aint gonna happen. As far as my fiancee, well thats another story. I hold no more bad feelings towards her about what she did, but, as far as trust and loyalty go, in my heart it just wouldnt be there. She betrayed me at the worst possible time in my life. She knew at that time that she was the only person in my life i could trust, but after that the trust was blown at least as far as on an emotional level. For the most part she just made it even easier for me to move further away from her emotionally.
16 huh? Sounds like you a got a pretty decent head on your shoulders for that age. Keep up whatever you have been doing to get yourself where you are and if theres any valuable info i can give you its stay in school, and more importantly, read. Everyday i see the younger generation and how thing have changed since the old school days. Me, im only 38 but am a much older person both mentally and intellectually than i need to be, but looking at it the majority of my friends are in their early and late 40's and 50's so a lot of that rubs off on me.
As far as me feeling guilty about what happened, my brother and i were two different people altogether as far as our lifestyles, he was the more peaceful person and eventually went on to become a reverend. Me, i was the black sheep of the family, the bad guy if you will. People in the neighborhood liked my brother, me on the other hand they feared. I keep thinking that if i had not have moved out on my own this wouldnt have happened because i would have been there to stop it. My brother had not had the street experiences that I had, he just wasnt a street smart person. He had never had a fight, never had guns stuck in his face, or any shit like that, that was my department. Basically he was just a hippie from the 60's and wanted peace, but me knowing how the streets were, i felt sort of responsible for his protection from that side of life.
Thanks for your words young brotha,
Never even heard of that shit......Quote:
Originally Posted by SmokeyTokey
Glad to see that your here and tokin'. Hopefully someday you will not think of it no more. Former infantry Marine here, hope to see you posting. Passing some good rep to you.
Damn Smokey,
Sorry to hear it bro. Man those war injuries really stick it in and break it off. I have a close buddy who was in Nam and that agent orange has fucked up both his legs. He has had multiple surgeries on both his legs but will never walk right again. I feel ya on the explosions as everytime i hear loud bangs and booms i find myself ducking and flinching. They told me i have PTSD. Funny how time has changed things, we have gone from "shell shock" to post traumatic stress disorder.