serious question, need serious answers.

STOP ALL NEGITIVE SELF TALK............

alright thanks guys, after sleeping on it (i did alot of thinking last night before i feel asleep) i guess all there is to do for me is make the effort to change, and work towards it, never forgetting that if i 'go blind' again, i may wind up in the same place i'm at now, by that i mean i now know i can't allow myself to forget that uncontrolled, i become exactly what i didn't want to become, maybe it's just me, maybe it's everyone i don't know, i just know i have to watch myself now, and stay conscience of what i do/don't in the heat of anger/aggervation/stress... yesterday i was almost in a state of catatonia, i remember starring off in the same dirrection for about 30 mins yesterday just thinking 'how', i'm sure some of you can't/don't understand just how bad it hurt me to realize i'd become everything i swore i would not. thanks for all the support and help, now i guess is the begining of the journey to 'recovery'.

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