Originally Posted by Gothen
When I first got caught, it was really bad. My mom went ballistic and laid it on thick. She went as far as saying she would just quit her new job (highest paying job she'd ever had. period.) and work at McDonald's so she could moniter me. Then she threatened to move us away and take me away from all of it. Then she said I was betraying her trust or whatever. Then she started to cry and told me to leave her the fuck alone. (exact words).
I told her I would quit, but I, obviously, didn't. She thought all way OKAY until one night I got caught by leaving seeds on the table. (Wasn't actually MY fault, but I take blame for it because I didn't clean up the house well enough that night) So, when that happened she threatened to send me to my father's family (they hate me more than Bush hates "Terrorism" simply because I'm a half-breed, and not of true blood) and force me to leave there. Then she threatened with the police, later on.
I told her right there and then that I didn't care anymore. I told her I didn't do pot to fit in or to feel welcome, I did it because it was a really good way to relax, and I enjoyed it. I told her it hasn't affected my grades or made a worse person. (My GPA actually went UP the first six weeks I started to smoke regularly) In fact, even if it is sorth of pathetic, pot made me realize you can't be bitter and lock yourself in your room, that's black with bedsheets over the window to keep the lock out and leave a life on the computer. It made me realize that I can't stay sad and depressed and think that the world hates me my entire life. To grow up being like that, being that unhappy, is even more frickin' pathetic than smoking pot.
I told her all of that. I also told her I wasn't going to stop smoking. We made an agreement:
- I'm out of her house by 18, college or not, "I'm done with it."
- When I'm busted, don't think of calling her. I can rot in that jail cell (her words).
- I would no longer allow people (MINORS) to smoke in my house, because of the fact that she could get arrested and our house taken away, etc.
So, she still doesn't want me doing it, but I told her that it's my decision, and I will make MY decisions by myself. It's my life, I said. She said, "It's my home." (thus the 3rd term to the agreement)
So, I do it. Now, I do it because it's really, really relaxing. I'm as responsible as I ever was. If there is homework, I'll do it before I smoke. Get the choors done, laundry, dishes, trash, etc etc. Then, I sit down, light up, and just listen to some music or watch TV.
I don't really understand what's wrong with that.
Anyway, some days are exceptions where I'll let up before I get home, then do all the choors and homework later that night. So, like a switch up of the regular day.
