Shit I wish I was a senior. I'm stressed out just wondering if i'll make it.
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Shit I wish I was a senior. I'm stressed out just wondering if i'll make it.
There really is nothing that you can do outside of ask him what the issue is. I had a similar circumstance in that my brother and I didn't communicate much when growing up. We're on much better terms no, but I never got any type of explanation or reason. If you ask him and he isn't forthcoming, the only thing you can do is let him work 'whatever' out of his system.
spend some time with him alone, maybe smoke with him so he knows youre on his side, and just talk to him. just having a close relationship with a good role model can really change someones life. maybe thats what he needs
Big Cal's right (as usual). Ask him what's up. Don't do it in a confrontational, face-to-face meeting kind of way. Be working alongside him on some task like cooking or sorting through a box or something. Ask him that way. But mostly just try and get him talking, and you can sometimes do that by telling him what things were like for you during a rough time. Young men have a very different communicating style from us girls, and face-to-face questions and talks can be unsettling.
My hunch is that he probably doesn't even know himself what's bothering him. He just knows that he's not happy with himself or his situation at home, especially if he's being ridden hard about stuff. And he's acting out on that by sort of passively not doing what he needs to be doing. It's an easy loop for young guys to fall into, and it can stick if families aren't careful.
Here's a tip for both you and your parents: Give him positive strokes. Focus on the positive and not the negative. Approve of him, hard as that may be. Do something special for him. Take some time where you take worries and disapproval totally off the table--don't even play it. The secret to successful boy-raising (and for that matter, husband-raising, too) is to love, love, love at every opportunity and not to criticize unless it's a matter of life or death. They thrive in an environment like that.
Get really high together. Then you can think of a great idea.
Protecting children from their mistakes only keeps them from learning how to handle them. Sometime the best thing you can do is fail. Of course, as family you should be there to help pick up the pieces. That responsibility never goes away.
dude at first, that sounded so much like the situationm i was in, i though you were my older brother at first lol.Quote:
Originally Posted by allsmiles
almost exactly a year ago,when i was 14, my mom found a resin covered toothpick in the bottom of my trashcan (yes, she was that suspicious...) anyways, my older brother got his nose way too far up my ass (metaphorically) about it, and i ended up kind of not wanting to talk to him. long before, he had found out i smoked and he threatened to tell my parents unless i did anything he wanted from now on(blackmailing me.. my older brother blackmailing me. pretty fuckin cold-hearted and immature if you ask me) but i refused to obey the fucker and he just never had theballs to follow through with his plan. so my anger towards him really started there. its a much much muuchhh bigger story than that, but thats the bassics.
i really doubt you did anything of the sort to your younger brother. but coming from someone who was at least sort of in the same situation, he's just pissed off that people are making a deal out of it. i know i was. i wanted everyone to cool the fuck down and stop worrying about me. maybe if you let him know you dont give a shit, and offfer to smoke a bowl with him, things will start to come together
sorry if my help wasnt help.. but thats the best i can do for ya