Conceited girl: "Aren't I tight?"
Conceited guy: "No, just full."
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Conceited girl: "Aren't I tight?"
Conceited guy: "No, just full."
Girl friend I had back when I was 18 looked at me right after I cum and said "Boy or a girl?" Be damned if she wasn't right! My first ex-wife!:smokin:
Oh yah, it was a boy!:thumbsup:
Couple of years ago I was @ a friend's family get-together... huge party.
I'm talking with this girl, everything is going fine. I ask her what school does she go to, and she says ABC - which was, the same school as my sister.
So, immediately I ask her (kind of excited) if she knows "Mary Turtle" (my sister, although I didn't say "she's my sister").
As soon as she hears "Mary Turtle", she tells me "AH! I hate that girl! She's a bitch... blah... blah..."
And I just started laughing my ass off... then my friend comes along, he asks what the hell happens - I was still laughing - and the girl rewinds for him the conversation...
Then my friend laughs out loud, and tells her: "You dumbass, Mary Turtle is his sister!"
LMFAOQuote:
Originally Posted by BabyFacedAbortion
hahahaha!!:D That turtle story is kinda funny..!:p
when i lost my virginity i told the girl it was overated haha
Went to a club with five women. Professional type women.
One of them who invited me said there is this woman who is really interested in you, ie (blind date). So I said, sure why not.
I only talked to this women, a Doctor, for less than two hours at the club.
While dancing close she says,
" I just want you to know up front that I want five childeren, but we can talk about that later after we get married"
Me thinking: WTF! (totally shocked by that statement).
I told her "You are moving waaaaay to fast for me"
She started to cry, (keep in mind this is a 38 year old professional woman, and she was not intoxicated).
She went back to the table where the other women were, crying her eyes out.
I dont know what she said to the other women when I was in the restroom, but when I came out and sat down they all had the look of "evil man" in their eyes.
So I up and left. Way too uncomfortable situation.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ganjasaurusrex
ok first of all... 5 fuckin children at 38?! does she want to like pop one out after another after another? second of all, that bitch was moving WAAAAAAYYYYY to fast... you did the right thing! definately!
This one time, the QVO were about ready to...uh...kill everyone in the house we (the Surenos) were partying in. I (the gentleman) get the job of protecting the 8 girls in a bathroom upstairs (It was a bathroom and a walk-in closet). So, I look outside, see all the guns and other weapons the QVO had (we had nothing)...So I sit down on the toilet and start having an emotional breakdown.
So, I'm paralyzed, and I hear this:
"OMG! I CAN'T DIE A VIRGIN"
"Bitch, calm down, you trippin' "
"NO! I CAN'T DIE A VIRGIN! Yo, Penguin!"
Me: "..."
"PENGUIN!"
"..."
Another girl: "I don't wanna die a virgin either..."
Both girls, in unison: "PENGUIN! WAKE THE FUCK UP!"
3rd girl gets up, makes eye contact with me, says: "You wanna fuck or not?"
Me: "..." *looks back down*
Girl sits down, tells the other two to forget it.
WHY DOES THIS SHIT HAVE TO HAPPEN WHEN I'M PARALYZED!?
so i was lyeing down next to this girl after sex and i look over at her in they eye and say:
"sorry for the crabs.... oh and the herps."