I would be down for that, it sounds like fun:jointsmile:Quote:
Originally Posted by stinkyattic
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I would be down for that, it sounds like fun:jointsmile:Quote:
Originally Posted by stinkyattic
Honestly man, talk to as many people as you can, and bring up intellectual subjects. One thing I've noticed through the years is that a LOT of people are smart and intelligent...but they are so caught up with their everyday shit and boring conversations that they never let it show. All they need is a little motivation..
Talk to people, excite their brains with interesting things and you will see that side of them emerge. Some people are more open than others, and that's how you find the ones you want to keep in your circle of close friends.
I understand that you have tried sparking intellectual conversations with people and weren't satisfied with the reactions you have encountered. Start off easy...try to make them understand where you are coming from... perception is something that many people overlook and underestimate. The way you project what you say might be confusing to some people, and they might just not get you. Whereas if you used a different approach to a certain subject, you might get them to understand better, therefore making them more enthusiastic about sharing intellectual matters and even learn about them.
As some people stated in this thread...older people might be what you are looking for. I personally love hanging out with older folks because they are so much more experienced and have such a vast perception of things. Not to mention that they obviously have learned more. You might just be one of those people who are ahead of their times, you know?
One more thing...if you think there is nobody around you that is able to keep up with your level of intellect, why not spread your knowledge?! There's nothing more satisfying than passing something on to someone else... If you can't join them, educate them!
Good luck my friend :jointsmile:
^yeah that's about all you can do. I love the party setting; people having fun, letting loose. But I still insist on speaking of things that are more elevated in that setting. I usually construct my comments in such a way that they can be easily grasped by those under an influence, but they tend not to remember the next day, much less remember my face.
Going to a library or cultural groups can help, but it seems like most of them are intellect-only and aren't much fun. It's really tough to find a person who appreciates elevated thinking but can also have fun in a devil-may-care manner.
Any friend I've ever had my entire life, I've either met by accident or through an existing friend. Making a structured effort to get friends always seems artificial and forced, so I just let friend-making happen on its own, which wouldn't be tolerable if I wasn't very comfortable being alone.
You know what.. sometimes it doesn't take much to change someone's perception or just little things in their life...
All it took was that one guy at that one party :thumbsup:
I had an incident once whilst in a public area, I musta
been staring at this chick!
I thought she was pretty!
she looked at me and said "what are you looking at!!"?
I never look at anybody after that!
eaves dropping has its perks
ipods do to
Dude you are way to smart to not have a g/f or have good socializing skills. I mean out of all the people on these boards I ALWAYS make sure I read your posts. They're ALWAYS informative, smart, and above all true. I mean if I were as smart as you I would use it on society. Everyone likes to talk to smart people.
Well... i was writing this post then one question striked me... and this question would make my original post useless, so instead rambling about how dumb are people and such, i will ask it.
What are your deepest and honestest reasons for wanting to be more social?
I dont want the usual answers... "i dont want to be an outcast", "i want be popular" and such... search deep in our heart (or mind) what you do expect from it.
I say it because of my own experience. When i was a child, I always was very introvert and silent. I had very few friends. But i wasnt confortable with it... even being happy for being alone i felt a disturbance, like a voice in my mind saying "you should be more social, you should talk with the people, its wrong to sit there alone whan everybody is singing and dancing and playing, and so..."
So, against my own deep will, but for agreeing with this impulse, or "voice" in my mind, i tried to socialize in my (few) friends parties, and so. But with no avail. I would make a struggle to talk with people, to chat with them... but kept being as socially inept as before.
Then, i started to smoke... and during the several experiences with weed, i realized a LOT of things about myself and my life, and remembered some interesting things...
The root of my problem was in my childhood... like i said, i always was very introvert. But my mother, who is very talkative, would nag me for being less shy. So, the impulse i had to be more social, the "voices" i heard in my mind, were my mom's voice, not a impulse from myself, from my own self.
I realized/remembered that i never liked people too much. I always prefered to be alone. So, when i was trying to socialize, i was doing a thing against my own will, and im sure that why i sucked so much in doing it.
After i realized it, i stopped to going parties, social events, and such, when i dont wanted to go there. I decided that if i liked to be alone, then i would be alone, and nobody (nor any voice) would say me what to do. I would do whatever i wished and not do whatever i wished not to do. And I could live this way forever.
But then i learned about controlled folly. And it changed my social life. Weed did make possible for me to separate my own self from my body... like... my body acts like a normal person, but my own self is detached from it, like observing it from outside... my self is not my body anymore, so my self is not inflenced by it anymore... im not into me anymore... its hard to describe, but maybe you know what im talking about. Complete detachedness.
So, being completly detached from my body, i would choose any act. I would act like being nice, or an asshole, or any act i choosed. And thats how i interact with people now. I act like i were a normal person, with feelings, and thoughts, and emotions, and such, but its only role playing. If you think a dumb conversation dont exercite your brain is because you dont know about controlled folly... In a dumb conversation, one or two neurones are engaged in talking, and several another ones are engaged in acting like if you were actually interested, immersed, engaged in the conversation. Thats a very mind-exercising thing... as most neurones are free, they can work on more useful things, like percieving the other persons thoughts for example...
Also, being detached makes you more free. People can say bad, harmful things to you... but as you are detached, it cant reach you. They will reach your body, but as your self is detached from it, they cant reach your self. So, you can choose any way to react to it, instead of react by instinct, being angry, or sad, or whatever... and its a plus.
Now, i have a social life that could be regarded as enough by any normal person. I go to parties, talk with people and so... and almost every people i know thinks im a very nice and cool person... And more than one girl were interested in me also... but its only controlled folly.
I could keep talking about controlled folly for hours and hours... but i wont annoy you with it. If you were interested in it, or have any question, feel free to ask.
And please, think about my first question... maybe the question is the solution for your problem... :thumbsup:
I know the true reason your social skills suck:
Your afraid of looking bad
I meet new smart people at college- if you don't take college classes now, try taking easy ones just to get to know people if you're able to afford it. Find out stuff you're interested in, and try to sit next to someone interesting-looking, I suppose?
Sell out for a couple weeks and start selling shit. It's kind of depressing and makes you feel guilty, but if you have a good trainer, after a few weeks you'll be confident enough to approach ANYONE. There are intelligent people out there, but what you're listening to is forced small talk in confined places. Crazy people thrive there. Go to the beach! You'll find some of the smartest people on the earth there. They know where it's at ;)