Why I choose to perpetuate my misery. You might be glad you read?

As we all know, one good day amongst a thousand bad days was all in vain. I think I consciously (in some conscious or another) choose to relive moments of fear and uncertainty as an attempt to alleviate myself from what I fear. However, contradictory as that may seem, I believe if I can delve deep enough into the mystery that hinders my spirit if you will, then I could unveil a whole other stature of being for myself. Such a feat seems improbable when I recall a quote from Buddha, it says "I gained nothing at all from supreme enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called supreme enlightenment."
I suppose somewhere in my mind believes there is an enlightenment down this dreary path I tread. Hope is not something I fear giving up, for I have none to start.

cheer up

hey ganj, u sound confused in your post, not that your post doesnt make sense, it makes amazing sense just that you seem unsure of life.

i hope life treats u better
im sure u deserve it :)

all the best to u man

Just as we may be fully aware, partially aware, or totally unaware of our motivations or of being under stress, we may respond to stress automatically with little or no thought, or with awareness and in a planned way. Automatic functioning is also seen in the form of habitual behavior in which situations that once required our conscious coping efforts no longer require our attention.

And ugh, why is my dot black?

That's a rather bad sign, Hahaitsdoogle. I'm afraid it appears your karma's gone dark.

J/K. Your reputationometer seems to be turned off. You can enlighten it again though your user control panel.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by hahaitsdoogle

Just as we may be fully aware, partially aware, or totally unaware of our motivations or of being under stress, we may respond to stress automatically with little or no thought, or with awareness and in a planned way. Automatic functioning is also seen in the form of habitual behavior in which situations that once required our conscious coping efforts no longer require our attention.

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Like an automatic defense mechanism? I have ticks throughout my day, often I find myself in a pensive mood pretending to investigate a matter, but never thoroughly reaching a conclusion. Enlightenment can be like fishing without bait sometimes. If you're lucky you might pull in a few fish on your hook but never anything that'll completely satisfy you.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Ganj

As we all know, one good day amongst a thousand bad days was all in vain. I think I consciously (in some conscious or another) choose to relive moments of fear and uncertainty as an attempt to alleviate myself from what I fear. However, contradictory as that may seem, I believe if I can delve deep enough into the mystery that hinders my spirit if you will, then I could unveil a whole other stature of being for myself. Such a feat seems improbable when I recall a quote from Buddha, it says "I gained nothing at all from supreme enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called supreme enlightenment."
I suppose somewhere in my mind believes there is an enlightenment down this dreary path I tread. Hope is not something I fear giving up, for I have none to start.

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that's a weird line for Buddha to say. Although I believe enlightenment is something/nothing at the same time.

here's my help for you to achieve enlightenment:
when pondering theories, "facts", history, present, tv always use SELF REASON
you know more than you know,
and if you know how much you don't know, you're doing well
you will get by, see you around

We are all searching for our own peace. For some of us, peace finds us, for others, we have to search and find to make it happen. Some of us may never find our inner peace, mostly those with zero willpower, but there is peace to be found with everybody. It's all a matter of being true to yourself and everyone around you.

Pretending = misery. Truthfulness = righteousness.