Abusive relationships

Here you go ladies, rant/rave/ect. Share your stories and feel for others. I think it's sad that I can make a thread like this but I've noticed that a LOT of girls here have been in some type of abusive relationship, whether is be physical, emotional or mental.

I've been in a few emotionally/mentally abusive relationship and only one mildly physically one. Basically I got into relationships with older men starting at age 13 with a 17 year old. It ended at 15 with a 21-22 year old. I've noticed a lot of women here have reached a point in their life when they said enough is enough and that's why I think this thread will be okay..and maybe it will help someone too.

Right on BFA. I'm a little out of it right now. When I get more lively I'll post.

I used to be in a very emontionally abusive relationship. He was very controling and I was young and I thought I had found the love of my life. I just kept forgiving him for everything he did. He cheated on me and gave me an std. In the end hes the one that dumped me and I lost all of my friends because I knew all of them through him. I knew for the last year of it that I had to get out but I just couldnt bring myself to do it because I was so enmeshed with the life I was leading and I was scared of what things would be like without him and all of the friends I had. Now he still lives at home, isnt in school, and doesnt have a job. I dont know if he ever even got his ged. My current boyfriend is a million times better. I think that if anyone ever hit me I would kill them. I can be very emotionally unstable.

Wow... it was only a matter of time before someone made this thread and I'm glad you did BFA.

My parents got divorced when I was 5 and my mom moved us clean to the other side of the state... I grew up thinking that since I was living with her, it was my father who pretty much abandoned us... and looked for male approval totally the wrong way when I was older.

I always have dated older guys, including a surpirsingly healthy and sweet 5 year relationship with a guy 19 years older that started when I was 20. We are still close to this day actually; the age difference was too much to really take it any further... but that is beside the point... just some background on what I think is a really common feeling that young women have of needing a man to approve of them.

So I was in a couple of emotionally abusive situations that I was too insecure to really deal with and get out of on my own terms but they all pale in comparison to another- I lived with this guy John for almost 2 years- he's a drinker- Well, I think that when you are drunk your deep hidden personality shows.
And his was not good.

I either didn't see or chose to ignore or was totally in denial about the warning signs- early in our dating he'd get drunk and rude, then drunk and verbally abusive, calling me names and all that lovely shit, and then apologizing the next day with that BS excuse "well I was drunk". Then he started throwing things.

First dishes, then furniture, then finally one night he picked me up by the belt and the throat and chucked me headfirst straight across the kitchen into a cabinet handle.
I still bear the scar to this day, a clean slice through my right eyebrow. I was too ashamed to even tell my parents, so I stayed with him for another month, until my face healed.

Never again.

After that experience I bought my own home and started living my life on my own terms.
You want to play rough, you're doing it on the lawn, and your shit will be out there with you.

I think a lot of women see the signs but choose to ignore them. Maybe because they're ashamed of the mistakes theyve made, they cant afford to leave, or they think its their own fault. I think the last one is the worst one.

I know I definitly saw the signs, especially in my last relationship...everything pointed to NO, but I was so desperate for love and for someone to take care of me that I think I allowed myself to let him take control of me. It took me atleast 6 months after we broke up to realize that it wasn't ME that was wrong, but it was HIM.

I met a guy on here (not really a great idea..meeting guys on the internet), you all might remember that about a year ago, we dated for a few months and it was basically all fighting with a little bit of loving. Every fight we had was about my age or how I was basically not good enough because of it. He always complained that I could never go to clubs or bars and he made me feel like shit for being so young. We smoked and had sex basically all the time. He manipulated me into thinking some really fucked up things.

My mom caught us having sex one day and reported it to my psych, who legally had to report it to the police. He told the cops that he swore I told him was 16, which is the legal consent age, but in reality I was only 15. He had me believing I lied to him about my age and that I did the wrong thing when I confessed to the police. I began to hate my own mother because he hated her. He contacted me for months when he wasn't supposed to, brainwashing me into feeling like I just put him in jail for absolutely no reason. As soon as I was just finally begining to recover from my depression and suicidal thoughts, he'd pop back in my life and it would start all over again. All I can remember screaming at my mother the day she caught us was "BUT WE'RE IN LOVE!"..Hah!

While he said he was considered a child molester by the state, I can't find him on any websites and all he got was a year's probation. At the time, I did everything I could to get him out of trouble and now all I wish was that he was in jail right now suffering like he made me suffer. I'm still scared he'll contact me again and I'll fall victim to him, and I'm even scared that he may read this, but all I can say to him is fuck you.


thanks for sharing your stories girls, I know we all can relate on some level. <3

If anyone ever feels like MAYBE, just MAYBE they're in an abusive relationship, you really need to get out. It will only get worse until finally it either ends *badly* somehow or someone gets really hurt.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by BabyFacedAbortion

I know I definitly saw the signs, especially in my last relationship...everything pointed to NO, but I was so desperate for love and for someone to take care of me that I think I allowed myself to let him take control of me. It took me atleast 6 months after we broke up to realize that it wasn't ME that was wrong, but it was HIM.

I met a guy on here (not really a great idea..meeting guys on the internet), you all might remember that about a year ago, we dated for a few months and it was basically all fighting with a little bit of loving. Every fight we had was about my age or how I was basically not good enough because of it. He always complained that I could never go to clubs or bars and he made me feel like shit for being so young. We smoked and had sex basically all the time. He manipulated me into thinking some really fucked up things.

My mom caught us having sex one day and reported it to my psych, who legally had to report it to the police. He told the cops that he swore I told him was 16, which is the legal consent age, but in reality I was only 15. He had me believing I lied to him about my age and that I did the wrong thing when I confessed to the police. I began to hate my own mother because he hated her. He contacted me for months when he wasn't supposed to, brainwashing me into feeling like I just put him in jail for absolutely no reason. As soon as I was just finally begining to recover from my depression and suicidal thoughts, he'd pop back in my life and it would start all over again. All I can remember screaming at my mother the day she caught us was "BUT WE'RE IN LOVE!"..Hah!

While he said he was considered a child molester by the state, I can't find him on any websites and all he got was a year's probation. At the time, I did everything I could to get him out of trouble and now all I wish was that he was in jail right now suffering like he made me suffer. I'm still scared he'll contact me again and I'll fall victim to him, and I'm even scared that he may read this, but all I can say to him is fuck you.


thanks for sharing your stories girls, I know we all can relate on some level. <3

If anyone ever feels like MAYBE, just MAYBE they're in an abusive relationship, you really need to get out. It will only get worse until finally it either ends *badly* somehow or someone gets really hurt.

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I remember that prick,,,royal loser is what I thought of him from the start...

women aren't the only ones that get in abusive relationships.... it's a too way street... just had to state that...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by slipknotpsycho

women aren't the only ones that get in abusive relationships.... it's a too way street... just had to state that...

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Yeah true dat.
Maybe this should have just been in the main sexuality forum.
Women just end up taking the brunt of physical abuse more often, as we tend to be smaller/weaker than our partners.

In a gender inequality class I took they told us that more women may hit their husbands more often, but men inflict more damage.