JOKE OF THE DAY

These three guys die in a car wreck and they all go to Hell. When they arrive the Devil asks each of the men what their sin was. The first guy says, "It's gotta be the booze. I'm always drunk."
The Devil decides to lock him in a room with nothing but shelves of every kind of alcohol imaginable.

The guy's thinking, "Fuck yeah! Look at all this alcohol!" and runs into the room.

The second guy says, "It's the women, I could never stay faithful to my wife."

The devil opens up the second door and inside is nothing but the finest looking naked women as far as the eye can see. The guy was to be locked in for 100 years. He couldn't believe it and his dick got instantly hard and he went running into the room as the Devil locked the door behind him.

The third dude says, "It's gotta pot. I'm always tokin' up."

The Devil opens the third door to reveal nothing but fields of 10 foot tall icky, sticky, take-a-toke, make-ya-choke, chronic, green, death bud. The stoner can't believe it. He goes in and takes a seat Indian style with his back to the door and the Devil shuts and locks the door.

One hundred years pass and the Devil returns to check on the three men.

He opens the first door and the man comes crawling out. He's got an empty bottle in one hand, he's completely naked, hasn't shaved or showered in years, and is covered in his own puke, shit, and piss. "I'll never drink again!" he says.

The Devil says it's good he learned something and decides to give him a second shot at life.

The Devil then comes to the third door. He opens it and sees nothing has changed. The stoner is still sitting there in the same position that he was 100 years ago.

The Devil asks him if he's learned anything.

The stoner turns around as a tear rolls down his cheek, "You gotta light, man?"

Anonymous

lmao

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mobay

These three guys die in a car wreck and they all go to Hell. When they arrive the Devil asks each of the men what their sin was. The first guy says, "It's gotta be the booze. I'm always drunk."
The Devil decides to lock him in a room with nothing but shelves of every kind of alcohol imaginable.

The guy's thinking, "Fuck yeah! Look at all this alcohol!" and runs into the room.

The second guy says, "It's the women, I could never stay faithful to my wife."

The devil opens up the second door and inside is nothing but the finest looking naked women as far as the eye can see. The guy was to be locked in for 100 years. He couldn't believe it and his dick got instantly hard and he went running into the room as the Devil locked the door behind him.

The third dude says, "It's gotta pot. I'm always tokin' up."

The Devil opens the third door to reveal nothing but fields of 10 foot tall icky, sticky, take-a-toke, make-ya-choke, chronic, green, death bud. The stoner can't believe it. He goes in and takes a seat Indian style with his back to the door and the Devil shuts and locks the door.

One hundred years pass and the Devil returns to check on the three men.

He opens the first door and the man comes crawling out. He's got an empty bottle in one hand, he's completely naked, hasn't shaved or showered in years, and is covered in his own puke, shit, and piss. "I'll never drink again!" he says.

The Devil says it's good he learned something and decides to give him a second shot at life.

The Devil then comes to the third door. He opens it and sees nothing has changed. The stoner is still sitting there in the same position that he was 100 years ago.

The Devil asks him if he's learned anything.

The stoner turns around as a tear rolls down his cheek, "You gotta light, man?"

Anonymous

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what about the secod door the devil never opened it?

Ok i got one,

There 50 ugly people and God says that he will grant them all one wish...

They stand in a line and God asks the first person what is your wish he says make me good looking, and he does...

The person at the end of the line is laughing his head of he cant stop!

God asks the second person the same question and he answers the same 'make me good looking' and he does....

The person at the end of the line is still laughing but nobody knows why...

This goes on and on everyone asks for the same thing until eventually God comes up to the last person and says 'What do you wish for' and the ugly person says 'Make them all ugly again'.... haha i thought this was funny i heard it when i was stoned and found it hilarious

Mobay there good, but what site did you get that from cos i've read it before..

There's a stoner and a super genius sitting on a bench waiting on a bus. The genius gets bored, leans over to the stoner and says, "Hey I'll tell you what, I'll ask you a question and if you don't know the answer you have to give me five bucks. If you ask me a question and I don't know the answer I have to give you fifty bucks." The stoner says, "Alright, Man." The genius asks the stoner, "What is the Pythagorian Theory?" The stoner replies, "I don't know," and hands the genius five bucks. "Okay," the stoner says, "What has three legs going up a hill and four legs going down?" The genius thinks real hard and finally gives up. he hands the stoner fifty bucks and then asks, "So, what is the answer?" The stoner says, "I don't know," and hands the genius five bucks.



A stoner finds a poor person on the street and helps him up. The poor person says, "Son, I'm a genie. And since you helped me I'll give you three wishes." The stoner says, "I want a six-inch joint!" The genie says, "Okay!" POOF! They stuff a six-inch joint and smoke it between the two of them. "What's the second wish? asks the genie. "I want a twelve-inch joint," says the stoner. "Okay," says the genie. POOF! And they stuff it and smoke it between the two of them. "And the third wish?" "I want a twenty-inch joint!!" POOOF!! So, they stuff it and smoke it between the two of them. Finally, the genie gets up and says, "Okay, it's time for me to go." The genie takes a couple of steps, pauses, turns around and says, "Okay, just one more wish."


I love you guys lol!

lol i heard it a little diffrent involving a paddy and cigerettes and aligter

lol i gotta say mobay i luv your avatar