HELP, new JOB testing...

hey wut up> im new here and ive got a problem..
im trying to get this new job, and its pretty much mine and i gotta take a drug test...problem is..1. the people know my parents, and 2. i smoked last saturday 10/29..and the test latest i can push it off is either the 8th or 9th of november...so its about 3 or 4 days short of a full two weeks to be clean...
ive been chugging water, i bought cranberry pills and cranberry herb...and it sucks to take but am i gonna be ok? im about 5'9" and weigh probably between 175 and 185...please reply with some feedback..my nerves are killing me here.
should i take the test with my pee, b/c ill have to go afterschool and do it?
or should i try getting someone elses?
~tweaking out~ :(

I have the following advice for you, having passed a couple of drug tests myself.

First, stop chugging the water and cranberry juice. They won't do anything since the test is days away. The only time you need to drink the water (cranberry juice is admittedly controversial, but I haven't seen any evidence that it actually does anything as far as drug tests go) is right before the actual test. THC is fat soluable, not water soluable. The only thing you're doing by chugging water is putting a lot of stress on your kidneys.

The THC metabolites are resting in your fatty tissue right now, and is slowly released as you metabolize fat. The only way to speed up the metabolization of these THC metabolites is to increase your metabolism. This is pretty hard to do, and hardly worth doing when you have a test in a week. If you had it in, say, a few weeks away, you might try doing some hard cardio and resistance training (weight training) to increase your metabolism. However, don't do any strenuous exercise a few days before the test, because this apparently floods the bloodstream with the THC metabolites, making them MORE concentrated in your urine. Geez, you just can't win!

Since it's for a job, and I'm assuming it's not some high-level government job, they're probably just going to do one of those drug panels where they take your urine sample and drop it into a panel in front of you. These are easy to pass. Find out if they do the test there or if they send it to a lab, because that makes a difference. You might ask, "So, will I get the results right away, or will I have to wait?"

Since it's probably one of the immediate panels, wake up early before the test. For two or three hours before the test, chug water. Also, take a couple of B vitamin complex pills. You can pick these up at Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Target, or any drug store. They stain your urine a nice yellow shade, so it doesn't look really clear when you produce a sample. Now that you've been chugging water for several hours, you'll probably be peeing quite a bit. Try to pee at least two times after you wake up and before you go to the test, because metabolites are most concentrated in your first morning urine. Chug the water, take the pills (you shouldn't need more than two), and try not to seem nervous when you go in. It seems like you've had a good amount of time from the last time you smoked, so it should come out fine.

Don't waste your money on "detox" drinks or any crap like that. The only thing they do is make you pee more, and we all know that THC doesn't care how much you pee, since it's sitting nicely in your fat cells. If you were taking a drug test for, say, Wal-Mart, I've heard of people who've had luck with the additive vials, products like Urine Luck. However, Wal-Mart uses the kind of test where they send it away to labs, and these are harder to beat. You, on the other hand, are left with the task of simply diluting and staining your urine so that the THC is no longer detectable. Good luck!

One other thing I forgot to mention: take a couple of asparin a few hours before the test as well. There's some evidence that it might mess with the test. And, if it doesn't, who cares. It's just asparin.

thank you so much for ur advice...
my test will be coming up soon so if i get even more freaked out, ill probably repost, but ill repost with what ill do..which is the b vitamin stuff and the asprin and the water. thank you for helping out my state of mind...
i was really worried..
i heard that if u dip ur finger in bleach and then stick it in ur urine that helps too..but im not really into experimenting for a drug test
and in a worse case scenario, should i completely explain everything to my little sister about how i need it, and use her pee?
i think ill be ok but i just wanna make sure, because again, if i fail i wont be making it near a computer anytime soon... :(
ill tell you guys how i make out, thanks again

ok so officially ive got another day, i can take the test tomorrow thursday november 10th, again 2 days shy of 14 days..but im gonna keep up the plan, which is just to pee, drink water and take those vitamins before hand, and also just to take some aspirin too, just in case, i might try the bleach thingy but im not sure if its that much of a crazy big test because its just a small job, i mean im only 16 and its working at a country club...but either way just to be safe and get a nice job ;) and being able to still blaze this weekend... :rasta: :pimp: :smokin: :thumbsup:
any other advice...shoot...ill check this again thanks! :dance:

if anyone checks this post, i just wanna say thanks to all the help i got, and ive had the job for a while now its december 11th and so to reply back so when someone's in my position dont worry just take the advice and chilll....and once ur done hit the bong deep. :rasta: