Monkey Whizz Drug Test

As some of you may know i posted before about having to do a drug test and i either 1 failed for dilution or passed.

Well I got another job offer and didn't feel like going through the stress and anxiety of not passing. So today i picked up Monkey Whizz by serious monkey bizzness. i haven't seen any posts about pass or failed so i figured i'd open a new thread to let you guys know whats going on. I took the test today at concentra medical clinic and luckily i have a friend who's girlfriend worked there and she informed me that they do keep the heat low in an attempt to catch people the don't use heating pads for it ( she says you'd be surprised. ) The only complaint i have with this particular product is the heat pad takes for ever. Says 1 hour on the instructions but, after 3 i only got it up to 94 degree's. So a friend let me borrow their vehicle that has seat warmers. So the 15 min ride i finally got the temp to 98. By the time it was said and done sitting for an hr in the lobby the temp read 96 with jap heat pad and my body heat. I almost fooked it all up because the other concentra didn't check for hernia's so i thought about leaving the belt on for the physical. A little voice in the back of my head said " Um hi, Um hello .... Take that mofo off. So i did and in walked a male doctor ( previous was a female ) an at the very end of the physical he said ok drop your pants. That little voice chimed in and said you owe me one bitch.

I will post my results when i get them. If someone wants to fill in their recent experience with the last 2-3 months using monkey whizz please feel free. :pimp:

would just like to say monkey whizz does work passed the drug test start tmw. Thanks for everything guys and smoke on

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Originally Posted by Crazyd9483

would just like to say monkey whizz does work passed the drug test start tmw. Thanks for everything guys and smoke on

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Thanks for posting your results, always great to hear success stories :thumbsup:

So here's my story-

A week ago I had to take a pre-employment drug screening for a job that's ran by the city. I got all the papers I needed from my new employer and headed to my favorite neighborhood smoke shop and picked up a "Monkey Whizz" synthetic urine kit.

The Monkey Whizz includes a belt with an attached plastic bladder that holds the synthetic urine. On the bladder is a thermometer to assure the perfect temperature when performing the test. It also comes with 2 heating pads, although you'll only use one, to heat the urine to 98-100 degrees.

I put the belt on under my underwear and jeans and attached a heating pad just as the instructions stated (approx an hour and a half before the test. About 45 mins after putting the belt on I checked the temp- it was exactly 98.6. Perfect! I then proceeded to go to the testing site.

Once I arrived I handed the receptionist my papers. She signed a few things, filled in a few blanks and handed it back to me. I, of course read everything before signing and I noticed she checked 2 boxes that read "Pre-Emplyment Urine Screening" and "Other - 8 Panel". This freaked me out instantly because I was confident the Monkey Whizz would work for a pre-employment screening because the quality of those kinds of tests aren't nearly as high as other tests such as probation drug test, or some other not so lax test.

I signed it anyway, crossing my fingers and went to the back where the doctor had me unwrap the seal on the cup and she then explained all of the rules including not to flush or I would have to re-take, empty my pockets, etc. I went into the bathroom and slid the door shut (my testing site bathroom had a sliding wooden door, lap corps and quest diagnostics do not. It's much more secure and private at a lab corn or quest) I then sat on the toilet and peed so when she came in to check there would be some in the toilet. As I was peeing I un-clipped the hose and the 99 degree synthetic urine poured easily out of the hose and into the cup. I filled the cup about 3/4 of the way and still had some synthetic urine left in the plastic bladder. To avoid the remaining synthetic urine in the bladder from leaking all over the inside of my pants- I reclippd the clips on the hose to reseal it. (PLEASE NOTE- the clips make a noise when being clipped closed but they do not make noise when being un-clipped open.)

Since she was standing right outside of the sliding door I had to be sure she didn't hear me clip it closed so I coughed as I clipped it shut. I pulled my pants back up, zipped, and opened the door- smiled and handed her my cup. She smiled back, checked a few boxes on the form, sealed my cup, had me initial, handed me my papers, and off I went.

After getting to my car I examined the papers closely. The box she checked read "Was the temperature between 90 and 100 degrees within 4 minutes of urinating?" She checked yes, which was a huge sigh of relief. Everything worked out perfectly, it was actually pretty damn easy.

I was still nervous the following 3 days because I wasn't confident that synthetic was going to work on an 8 panel test. I called the Monkey Whizz customer care center and the representative assured me that as long as the temperature was between 90 and 100 degrees that they would take it from there. He explained that synthetic urine is still urine, it has all of the components of human urine- it's just made in a lab. This calmed me down a little bit, but I still spent the next 3 days searching the internet for actual first hand stories of people that used Monkey Whizz.

I'm not sure if I'm a terrible "googler" or if there's a very limited amount of reviews for Monkey Whizz but I thought I'd share my story and calm someone else's nerves like I wish someone could have for me. So here it is, whoever you are, breathe! This is a very easy way to pass a drug test if you're a heavy smoker like me and know detox will not work on your THC saturated body, lol. Just remember, stay calm, don't look nervous or suspicious, be careful when RE-CLIPPING it makes a very minimal amount of noise but still, be safe not sorry! Once you're out of the testing place and they have released you, Monkey Whizz will do the rest! So relaxxxxxx and take a hit from the bong, you're gonna pass just fine.

P.S. You're obviously searching the internet as you have come across this thread. STOP searching, 90 percent of what you find is from people that have no idea what they're talking about, or people who tell you smoking is bad, or people trying to convince you to be clean instead and blahblahblah. I'm a very experienced smoker and this is my first hand story on what worked for me. I hope it helps you!


#MaryJaneOrDie