Hair testing with no time for preparation

I just got offered a great job, fantastic pay and good benefits. I am a single Mother receiving no assistance, so not having this job would be a major blow to the financial belt. I have been smoking for 10 years, smoking much less in the last 3 or so years then I ever did. I smoke about a blunt a day or 1 gram of regular grade greenery, sometimes a blunt will last me a day and a half. I stoped smoking all together the day I was offered the job and told it was contingent upon me passing this test, which was only 2 days ago...I have to take the test on Wednesday which is only 4 days from now. I read these boards, did my own research on THC's chemical compounds and how it is stored in the cells and transferred to the hair shaft. I am a native american female with hair below my shoulders. I am 5'4, 180lbs..super slow metabolism and skip meals daily, live a stressful life and have a drink or two (151 and coke) every night just about.
My first question is, they told me a hair test, but if the company drug policy I signed says hair and/ or urine throughout the entire document...do I have a right to request the urine test? THC or no THC..I do not want anyone cutting my hair.
I love my hair and wear it proudly..Tide, Bleach, Propylene Glycol from anti freeze or cigar humidifyer products; none of this was an option as I feel it would damage my hair drastically if not cause serious injury to the skin. I used hair relaxers for many years ( atleast 17 years), I stopped relaxing my hair a year ago and now all I need is a good wash & condition, pluss my Chi flat iron to keep it straight. I have been coloring however; Garnier makes a special line for Naturally dark hair and it turn it a vibrant red..which is hard to do. I got caught up on the fact that THC is stored as an oil and is only oil souluble. Then I looked into how people get it to break down in cooking it for butter and figured that oil was the only way to get it out. I learned that it has to be a fatty oil that would "bond" with the THC oil and essentially bring it to the surface to be washed away. So here is what I did and I am praying I am right.
I took an interest in herbs and essential oils a couple of years ago, so I have a cabinet full of them. When making oils I use a Sweet Almond carrier oil as it is 78% fatty acid and bonds to the essential oil ( hence the term "carrier oil")...this enables you to only have to use a few drops of the essential oil, as they are very expensive. I looked up the almond oil in hair and it turn out it's good for your hair and can help to pull dirt and and pollution particles out of the hair because of the sticky fat. Here is the link I found
Almond Oil for Hair
I added a few drops of Tea Tree oil, as it is a known cleanser and anti-microbacterial..don't know if that helped, but I figured what the hell. I soaked my hair in this mixture and let it sit for 5 hours..hoping the amlond oil bonded with all the thc and it would be ready to wash away. I mixed in a shot glass Dawn diah detergent ( they used it for the Pelicans in the oil spill, it's reputed for being a de-greaser of somw sort) and a small amount of Neutragena Oil free astringent ( which is said to open pours and strip away oil immediately). Then I washed with Johnson and Johnson baby shampoo because of its Propylene Glycol agent. Then I soaked my hair in more of the Almond oil and Tea Tree mixture and combed it out. I then shampooed really good with my Normal Garnier, put a cholesterol treatment in it to sit and then I will rinse this and put the Garnier conditioner in it to sit overnight( which I normally do). My plan is to try to push my test to Friday instead of Wednesday and try and buy a little more time..but today is Saturday so I have to wait until Monday to call. I will redye my hair the same red color 2 nights before I take the test as a last shot effort. People said that hair dye doesnt work..but the one I am using enters the cortex to strip the naturally dark hair color and replaces it with the red color deposit...so I'm thinkin if peroxide gets in the cortex, it has to wash away toxins right?
Any chemists in the house, Salon stylists, experts on the subject that can tell me if this is all effective enough to significantly reduce the THC levels. Can I simply say I dont want them cutting my hair and get a piss test because it says hair and/or urine sample? I am dirnkin plenty of water, cranberry juice, and of course..the 151..so I'm trying to be prepared for both. Did 17 years of hair relaxing damage my cortex to the point of being non detectable ( my hair looks good, but i do get breakage and spilt ends)? Does the 151 that runs through my bloodstream regularly clear anything? I was in the hospital a few months ago and received very stong antibiotics by iv for 2 weeks..would that help? I was given prescription IBProphen and Naproxen after that ordeal, I read these can be false positives...I was told to bring all prescrip meds Ive taken in past 90 days, so if i have a problem..does this fly as an excuse? Please help!!

Come on people..i need some oppinions

get some paragraphs at least, i didnt make it halfway..

but a simple search: 'hair drug test' and top of the list = http://boards.cannabis.com/drug-test...t-jerry-g.html

Ive heard long haired people testing positive years later after stopping. Depends on how far back the tests are willing to go; I think most are a couple months back tho.

Good Luck!

Thanks for the response, I found Jerry G's method, the Maccu method, and alot of other things that seemed they would leave my hair falling out in clumps when I was done. I understand it may be a little long at 3 extended paragraphs, but since when do pot heads not read? I did nothing but research (reading) for 2 days and I came up with some interesting information that seems it could work, but I am not positive. I'm looking for someone to read it and tell me what they think. I mean if it works, it would be a good thing for everyone to know how to strip the THC from your hair with out ruining your hair. This test is unfair to women, so are most of the "methods"...as most women care about their hair and do not want to destroy it.

Got no prob reading, but its a little difficult stayin on the same line in a block of text. just tryn to help u get more responses next time.

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I did nothing but research (reading) for 2 days and I came up with some interesting information that seems it could work, but I am not positive.

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You're asking if these remedies that you pretty much made up, work? No one will chime in and tell you if it will work or not since ur the first guinea pig to try it.
That being said, 'I' dont think herbs, oils, detergents, and almond shampoo soaks will do anything but make ur hair smell good..

And a coverup hair dying wont do anything just as you've heard. You gotta strip the hair, not cover the outer layer. ie: one of the items on ur 'not an option list'.

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Can I simply say I dont want them cutting my hair and get a piss test because it says hair and/or urine sample?

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Prolly not gonna have a choice.

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Did 17 years of hair relaxing damage my cortex to the point of being non detectable ( my hair looks good, but i do get breakage and spilt ends)?

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no, new hair grows all the time.

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Does the 151 that runs through my bloodstream regularly clear anything?

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No.

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I was in the hospital a few months ago and received very stong antibiotics by iv for 2 weeks..would that help?

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no.

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I was given prescription IBProphen and Naproxen after that ordeal, I read these can be false positives...I was told to bring all prescrip meds Ive taken in past 90 days, so if i have a problem..does this fly as an excuse? Please help!!

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Are you asking if Ibuprofen and naproxen will give you a positive reading for MARIJUANA??

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This test is unfair to women, so are most of the "methods"...as most women care about their hair and do not want to destroy it.

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? Guys get asked for this test as well.. you only need 3/4ths of an inch of hair for the test, and not necessarily from the head.
Besides, they are not asking you to destroy your hair to rid illeagal substances from showing up in their test, so you can work for them LOL.

Good Luck! I think ive gone cross-eyed:stoned:

Buddahisms,

Your not going to strip the THC form your hair follicles by using almond oil, green tea, or dawn dish soap. You've done some nice research here, but your going about this the wrong way. I will agree with Smokemypiece and tell you that Jerry G's hair cleansing method is the only hope you have. I have referred a number of people to this method and never heard of it destroying their hair. This method is not full proof but has a good success rate. My advice to you, would be too have a professional hair stylist do it. And I would recommend doing at least 3 bleach and redyes.

Thank you both for taking the time to read it and give your oppinions. I will let everyone know how it worked out, all else fails..I have another job offer on the table..this was just the better of the two..so hopefully I can get past it.