Physical exams, vaginal bottle insertion.... and much more. Help a newbie out!

This is my first post and I need your help!! My situation is not quite unique, but I wanted some feedback as to how legitimate my idea is. I have not smoked in two weeks, and doing a 7 day detox, an have a few days till my drug test. I have a feeling I will be clean, but I had a substitution idea I wanted to run by ya'll just in case. My situation is a bit different because I have to get a physical which includes a drug test. My idea is to have my mom is going to pee into a shampoo sized bottle for me(ya know keep it in the family), and then I would keep it in a coffee mug of hot water until i get in to the doctor. Then before I sign in I will go to the bathroom, take out the bottle and insert it into my vagina. Depending on when they decide to do the urine test, I am hoping it will stay warm in there for at least an hour but it prob wont be more than like 30 min. Then go to the bathroom and do my thang. My only worry is that, for my physical, I have to bring in all of my prescription drugs in that I am taking. I take Tenex, celexa, neurontin and clonazopam. My mom does not take any of these drugs. Would these medications show up in my urine normally, and it would seem suspicious that they are not in my moms sample? I am not even sure if they will be looking for them in the urine, since they are just testing for the hard drugs.

I am going to try and be able to use my own, but if worst comes to worst I will substitute because it seems to work for others. Has the medication aspect been an issue for others in the past? Also, do women recommend keeping the bottle in your undies with a heating pad, or would that be too noticeable during a physical. I do not think they will need to do any vaginal exams which is why I am ok with hiding the bottle up there. Uncomfortable but supposidley it stays at the right temp.

Thank you guys for reading and any info you could give would be amazingly appreciated!

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Originally Posted by Maddy334

My only worry is that, for my physical, I have to bring in all of my prescription drugs in that I am taking. I take Tenex, celexa, neurontin and clonazopam. My mom does not take any of these drugs. Would these medications show up in my urine normally, and it would seem suspicious that they are not in my moms sample? I am not even sure if they will be looking for them in the urine, since they are just testing for the hard drugs.

I am going to try and be able to use my own, but if worst comes to worst I will substitute because it seems to work for others. Has the medication aspect been an issue for others in the past?

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Sorry, but we cannot discuss other types of drugs because it is against the rules to do so..

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Originally Posted by Messageboard Rules

Other subjects we do NOT discuss here include:

-Other drugs, including alcohol. This is a very important one. We discuss cannabis products only. Repeated references to other drugs, including misuse of pharmaceuticals, or use of psychoactives that may still be legal in your area, WILL result in a ban.

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:admin1:

even though these are my prescription medications?

P.S. SORRY!!

even though I broke the rules, any info ya'll could give me would be most helpful. Won't happen again!

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I have a feeling I will be clean

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What do you base this upon?

Have you taken a THC home test?

I did two and one came up clean after me substaining and drinking water, and the other didnt. So I really don't want to take any chances. I hate the idea of being dishonest, But he fact is that I smoke occasionally, so I need to deal with it.

how are you going to fit a "shampoo sized bottle" in you without walking funny?

Haha ok like a travel sized one. Not a big one. Wow that would hurt. I tried it and it fits. Not too uncomfortable.

I am worried about using a balloon.