Attitudes towards depression

I'm sure there are other people here who are chronically melancholy, and you must know what I'm talking about here...the irritating and ignorant attitude of most people towards it. I've seen it on this site, in old and very recent threads, where people who speak of feeling badly are dealt with in the wrong manner.

What most people, it seems, will say, is something about remembering you have food on the table, that others are worse off, that you should just grow/cheer up, snap out of it. And all that is true, from a detachedly logical perspective...but the thing is, it's not a fucking rational thing. Rationally, you know there's no reason to feel this way, that it's a toxic feeling that you should just get rid of, that at least you're not living in some third world mud hut. Your logical faculties listen to this, but the rest of you doesn't listen. There's this all-pervasive attitude that depressives are just self-indulgent babies, and it pisses me off. No one wants to feel that way--if there was an easy road out, it would be taken, in a second.

I don't really experience this in my personal life, because I hide it at all times, but I've seen this view on it, and it's fucked. I tried to confide in a dear friend once, who pretty much gave me all the above shit...people just don't understand. Thoughts?

agreed

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Originally Posted by Revanche21

agreed

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Thank you. Someone always has it worse, but that doesn't make it any better....if a guy gets his leg cut off, you can tell him at least it wasn't both legs. Somehow I don't think he'll care.

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Originally Posted by overgrowthegovt

Thank you. Someone always has it worse, but that doesn't make it any better....if a guy gets his leg cut off, you can tell him at least it wasn't both legs. Somehow I don't think he'll care.

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As you have problems with my viewpoint, I have a problem with this viewpoint. You are melancholy. You can't help that. I'm happy-go-lucky. I can't help that either. And there's no denying it, one leg is better than no legs.

When life gives you lemons, you can either make lemonade or say fuck the lemons and bail. Personally I kinda like pink lemonade.

I agree, however I feel that there's more to what these people are trying to do when they say something like "there's worse situations you could be in". I believe that a statement like that works to reinforce positivity. And psychologically, that has its benefits, wouldn't you agree?
Someone who is depressed cannot possibly be hurt by hints of positivity. While they don't provide a cure to the main problem, they may help to discover one.

Just my two cents.:hippy:

Mabey you should talk to someone trained in these things.
Not regular people, even your friends, I know when people start confiding in me or letting off a load to say. My mind just shuts down, as soon as I hear im so this and that, I get in that mood, and feel like saying, "well cowboy the fuck up then"(I am by no means a cowboy but you get the idea, we use it alot here). I know this is not right but half the time people around me, just need a reality check and not therapy or a shrink, but sometimes those aaround me do need someone to talk to. But I am not the logical one to ask, probley the same with most of your friends. I am to into working the problem not having the problem work me. But I cant solve anyone elses problem, just give my input which is usualy along the lines of, in the desert you cant cry over spiled milk.

FreshNugz...I agree with the good intentions part of it, and often that's generally the case (futile as it may be); it's only when said scathingly or condescendingly that it irks me.

Johnny...I see what you're saying, man. You did acknowledge that one's disposition can't really be helped, which I appreciate. With some it's more a question of having the lemons and really wanting to make lemonade but just not having hands strong enough to squeeze them.

MadSativa....I'm guessing no one confides in you very often, if that's the response they get. People often feel ashamed of their feelings because of our whole stiff-upper-lip culture, so things tend to fester inside a lot.

^^ you would think they wouldnt, but they just keep on doing so

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Originally Posted by overgrowthegovt

Johnny...I see what you're saying, man. You did acknowledge that one's disposition can't really be helped, which I appreciate. With some it's more a question of having the lemons and really wanting to make lemonade but just not having hands strong enough to squeeze them.

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That was beautiful man, I mean it. Now you need to focus on the solution rather than the problem. The first step on the road to recovery is accepting that you have a problem, just like alcoholics man. I really do believe in everything I say too, I'm not just swatting some bullshit.

I guess you could always just buy lemonade crystals too..

I know someone who has 85% of their body scarred from 3rd degree burns, he doesn't have functional fingers, and can't do much of anything he once was able to the same way..until I have it worse off than he is, and until people I know have it worse than he does, there's no reason why someone should think that their life is miserable, because he sure doesn't have any problems accepting what he was handed out, nor should anybody else. If life was perfect, it wouldn't be life, it would be a dream.