Looking Ahead To Hell

Nobody sees that frustration that I go through, in the early morning hours, because everyone's asleep. When my medicine is running really low, I know that Hell's fire will come soon. As I walk down the street, past every single angel on Earth, I have to hide the fire behind my eyes.

I am so disappointed. If it's not their fault, it's their parent's fault, or, their grandparent's, or, so on. The people, that I can turn to, can only offer what affects everything that I don't want tampered with. Like, my sanity.

Sooner, or, later, I'll be able to reach out and help someone, but, I have to be let off this leash. I can only go so far without my mind being struck down with pain.

Not exactly sure what's wrong, but I get frustrated in the early morning too. It's a combination of hating to go to sleep, being out of cigarettes, and having to work in a few hours. 5am rolls around and suddenly I'm tired as hell and I can't stand the feeling, the entire idea of 'I do not want this, I want to sleep for 10 hours'.

Thanks, Drybes! If the doctors could figure out what was wrong, my lawyer would've been able to win me compensation so I could pay for my herb, illegally, for the rest of my life.

They couldn't and my lawsuit's winnings went into a guitar and a convertible, which I gave to my ex-girlfriend when we broke up because she needs it. I don't. The car, not the guitar.

If you want to check it out, be my guest: http://boards.cannabis.com/legal/140...t-me-down.html

One act can turn my life from daily hell to daily heaven. This act was our constitutional right given by our Founding Fathers.

I take it you can't get Marinol / Marinol doesnt work for you?

I haven't tried it. I wanted the secondary pain to go away on it's own. I told the doctors, no pills. Finally, after 3/4 of a year, I wound up on a year's worth of experimenting with pills. There's more to what weed does for me, than just changing my pain to bliss.

I'm done with this pain that I've felt for three, and a half, hours since I woke up at 2:00 a.m.

I'll see you in a bit, when I'm on the other side of life!

If I could take a pill that immediately warms my entire body, and, immediately erases my gait, and, immediately sprinkles joy down my leg (and, somewhat, my arm), and, increases my focus time (allowing me to see something, then move on to the next thing), and, corrects my imbalanced hips, and, oh, well. I've had one hit. I can't prove anything to anybody.

I'm so sorry for all the pain and discomfort you suffer from daily, beachguy. :( It should make us all aware of our blessings.