Quick Fix Experience- Success!
This is an account of my recent pre-employment urine test success. I present my narrative because this exchange of information is both helpful and critical to our struggles. We should be judged by the merits and demerits of job performance alone, not by the levels of certain metabolites found in our bodies.
Responsible use of cannabis can shape and change lives. Drug testing is one of many socio-political tools used by pigs to perpetuate their abuse and discrimination of the different. Testing inspires fear, a nausea that anyone of difference understands and loathes. It is also an invasion of privacy; what I do with life outside of work is confidential. We who truly believe that cannabis should be legalized for adults have an inherent responsibility to share because knowledge is power.
I scheduled my urine test for 11:30 am at a doctorâ??s office up the street from my house. The weekend before, I did my best at research and finally decided on Quick Fix 4.0. At about 10:15, I warmed up the bottle in the microwave for 10 seconds on high, placed the rubber band around the bottle, secured the bottle with duct tape (not a good idea because tape makes unwanted noise) to my balls, got sufficiently faded (to maintain calm), and was out of the house by 11:15. Originally, getting high wasnâ??t part of the plan because I thought the doctor might check my heart rate (cannabis speeds up the heart), but decided in its favor. Upon arrival, I was rather nervous because I did not have to urinate. Note, diuretics, such as coffee, help. At about 11:55, I was asked, or rather, prodded into the bathroom to give it a shot. I still did not have to relieve my bladder, so I grew even more nervous. Please note that the bathroom remained unlocked and was not very spacious. The doctor had just been standing outside, ready to infiltrate the scene at the slightest disturbance (tape noise). I managed to pour all contents into the vial without making much noise and knew I was halfway home. I then made a costly mistake- I flushed the toilet, in part because of nerves and habit. I was scared that I had made too much tape noise, and consequently flushed the toilet as a diversion. This prompted the doctor to knock loudly and impatiently because I was told not to flush and wash until I had opened the door and submitted my sample. As per an unidentified source who knows the U.S. Dept. of Transportation (DOT) well, the toilet turns blue or some other color when real urine is present in the toilet. That is why we are told not to flush. Things happen and conditions change, so please be prepared for immediate plan changes. In the end, by the doctor's good grace, my sample was accepted. I start my job next week.
To my pothead brothers and sisters, I thank you for reading, and hope that we keep one another advised and informed of recent developments and policies surrounding drug testing. May the power of ganja liberate us all! Peace, Love, & Unity.
Yours,
You On Dae Won
Quick Fix Experience- Success!
holy crap.. i didnt kno about the magical toilet water or the paranoid doctors...
are they allowed to frisk you before entering?
or more generally, what else would they do to catch someone trying to cheat?
Quick Fix Experience- Success!
Quote:
Originally Posted by atspace
As per an unidentified source who knows the U.S. Dept. of Transportation (DOT) well, the toilet turns blue or some other color when real urine is present in the toilet. That is why we are told not to flush.
Actually, I think your friend at the DOT is off a little. There is no magic toilet water that turns blue. The water is made blue or another color so that you can't dilute your sample with toilet water. Also, there shouldn't be a sink in the bathroom but if there is the water flow should be cut off and controlled by the collector. These are two regulations that are not always followed, like in a doctor's office that is more used to taking samples for medical testing. They also don't want you to flush so that you can't send evidence to the deep blue sea such as a condom used to sneak in a sample. Not like you couldn't just shove it in your pocket.
Sheist, i have answered the extent a collector can go through to prevent subbing. I would normally tell someone to use the search feature because I answer it all the time but I am going to add this to the sticky and then refer to it in the future. This is only for employment testing, not court ordered testing. One is asking you to empty your pockets. Another is asking you to remove outerwear such as a coat or jacket. If there is a buldge they can ask you to pat yourself down but they can't touch you or frisk you. They take the temp on the sample and it should be in the range of 90-100. If not, that sample is kept and another sample is to be collected within 3 hours and you are not allowed to leave. This second sample is then produced under observation, the collector must watch the urine leave the body and enter the cup. Both samples are then sent in for testing.
Quick Fix Experience- Success!
Quote:
Drinking lots of water for days and days before the test will not help you get clean quicker. All that water will not make your kidneys work better.
Dats not neccasarily tru man, my girls mom smoked everyday for like 2 months and in 4 days of drinkin water passed a test, she thot she was fuked, and hers was supervised police test.. I think the only test help she had was this drink that cleans you out, and that with lots and lots of water, will work.
Ending myselfs train of thought this has nothing to do with anything here because your talkin bout employment testing,,, But wuteva ima go blaze now........................................
Quick Fix Experience- Success!
Quote:
Originally Posted by superhighkite
Dats not neccasarily tru man, my girls mom smoked everyday for like 2 months and in 4 days of drinkin water passed a test, she thot she was fuked, and hers was supervised police test.. I think the only test help she had was this drink that cleans you out, and that with lots and lots of water, will work.
That's lovely, you have 5 other posts before this one and your evidence is your girl's mom, not even your own experience but someone twice removed from you. Did she drink a lot of water of the day of the test? I imagine she did and that is the dilution method. She passed by diluting her urine concentration of THC metabolites not by cleaning herself out by drinking lots of water for days before the test. Now you can do a search for GFR and you will see my posts with evidence showing that drinking lots of water doesn't make your kidneys remove THC metabolites from your body more quickly so unless you have evidence otherwise, please don't give bad advice in the drug testing forum.
Here, I made it easy for you.
http://boards.cannabis.com/drug-test...ur-system.html
