Probation - Urine Test

Ive recently been put on probation, and I honestly cant see myself stoping smoking marijuanna; and I really dont want to ither. I have random drug and alcohol tests.

Now, Ive never been in this kind of situation before, and never had to do a drug test, so im a little confused as to what to expect. When I get called from my probation officer, and tells me to come in; will he be calling a day before? And, when I go in, how will this test be organized? Will I have someone breathing down my neck watching me pee in a cup, will he be literally looking in mirrors to make sure im not doing anything fishy, or what?

Im planning on doing the substitution method, just to be safe. Is it safe, if I practice enough? And by safe, I mean, is it safe to not get caught in the act of doing this? I read alot on these forums, and did a little bit of substitution practicing myself; This is what I understand:

I need a 2oz bottle of clean urine; or a condom (Im planning on using a bottle)
Its going to be tucked beneath my scrotum, and near my anus.
Being there, it should be around 89 degrees farenheit (experimented)
From what I understand, I need to heat this up to around 98 degrees farenheit before I put this urine into the sample bottle thingy...

Seeing as I have no idea how this drug testing thing is operated (I dont know if im going to be watched while im peeing, or if im going to be behind a closed person bathroom, or behind a stall, etc.); I dont know what to expect, or how to heat this urin up.

If this urin is infact heated up to around 98degreese farenheit (Give or take a few??), and I got the piss from a clean person; do I have anything to worry about? Like did I do anything wrong, forget anything?

Also, I appologize, but, if I were to make someone pee for me, how do I perserve the pee to seem natural, As if it just came out of me? Do I need to refridgerate it to perserve it for days/weeks? And take it out the morning before the drug test, heat it up, tuck it, heat it up, and then put it in the sample?

Sorry for all the questions, its just I dont feel like going to jail under my current charges (9 Felonies, 4 misdameaonrs), and im sure if I fail ONE drug test, I will be in there for quite some time. And please dont tell me, if its that important, I shouldnt do drugs, because, thats not what im looking for.

Thanks in advance.

they will watch you, but not too closely. generally you will call once a month, usually between the first and tenth of the month, and the PO will tell you that you have 12 hours to come in. i was never called randomly to come in, but it is possable.

before i went on probation i quit for a month and bought a few home tests. after experimenting i found that i could smoke once a week and be clean in 2-3 days, so that's what i did. i just made shure to be clean for about a week before the test to be safe.

really it's not worth going to jail over smoking some pot. imo, showing that pot is not addictive, only habbit forming, proves that smoking pot is not as 'bad' as people say.

[align=center]I was put on probation last year for a dui. I was on supervised probation and he only piss tested me once every 4 months if that. Some probation officiers do their jobs, some dont just do everything he tells you to, he tells you to jump you better jump. Probation is jail without the bars. I never quit while i was on but its the smarter thing to do.[/align]

Thanks for the replies everybody.

Bumping this topic so hopefully FakeBoobsRule sees it and gives me a fantastic response... ;-)

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Originally Posted by mjo890

Bumping this topic so hopefully FakeBoobsRule sees it and gives me a fantastic response... ;-)

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Thank you MJO for the endorsement. You know who to come to so +k.

With that said you are not going to like my answer. Smoking on probation is a horrible idea. If you must though, wait a little bit into the probation and take a few drug tests to see what you are up against. Unlike employment tests, court ordered tests can be observed (watching the urine leave the body and enter the cup) or monitored (in the same room). I would guess that there is a 95% chance that one of these will be your test. You need to do a few and find out. If you can't sub successfully then you are going to have to wait out the probation. Subbing is against the law so if you are caught the judge is not going to be happy, especially when you are on probation for 9 felonies and 4 misdemeanors. You should only sub if there is no one in the room or else you are really going to face some massive legal consequences if you are caught.

You also may be subject to saliva or hair tests so this is another reason to do a few tests to see what they are going to do.

Finally, if your sample is 89 then you better not do it or you better practice some more. The sample has to be between 90-100 and a sample not in this range can also be considered tampering and is just like getting caught. Urine should be stored frozen.

So, be patient and please take a few tests first and report back and we will re visit how to smoke while on probation, ok! :thumbsup:

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Originally Posted by FakeBoobsRule

Thank you MJO for the endorsement. You know who to come to so +k.

With that said you are not going to like my answer. Smoking on probation is a horrible idea. If you must though, wait a little bit into the probation and take a few drug tests to see what you are up against. Unlike employment tests, court ordered tests can be observed (watching the urine leave the body and enter the cup) or monitored (in the same room). I would guess that there is a 95% chance that one of these will be your test. You need to do a few and find out. If you can't sub successfully then you are going to have to wait out the probation. Subbing is against the law so if you are caught the judge is not going to be happy, especially when you are on probation for 9 felonies and 4 misdemeanors. You should only sub if there is no one in the room or else you are really going to face some massive legal consequences if you are caught.

You also may be subject to saliva or hair tests so this is another reason to do a few tests to see what they are going to do.

Finally, if your sample is 89 then you better not do it or you better practice some more. The sample has to be between 90-100 and a sample not in this range can also be considered tampering and is just like getting caught. Urine should be stored frozen.

So, be patient and please take a few tests first and report back and we will re visit how to smoke while on probation, ok! :thumbsup:

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Ugh, you are so right FakeBoobsRule; I hate your answer. :D I've officially been on probation sense June 30th, and I haven't had a drug test yet. I was told your allowed to fail your first drug test? If thats true, im alittle relieved, but if theres any way I can refrain from doing this, it would look a lot better to my judge. Sense then I have smoked a good fare share of marijuanna. Probably a half all together? And before that I guess you could say I was a heavy smoker. Everyday a few times a day.

I have a few friends who have the same PO, so i'll ask them how the drug test is administered; so hopefully we could discuss smoking on probation, alittle sooner. :thumbsup:

I'm assuming subbing on a court ordered urine test, is not really an option for me. Im pretty sure a few friends with the same PO told me they breathe down your neck while you pee, but i'm going to double check on that.

Saliva and hair tests are not going to happen, i'm pretty sure of this. Considering no one I no around here gets that from probation, and i'm pretty sure my judge said urine test.

Okay, and on to the reason why I came onto these boards this morning (I was surprised when I saw your response); I was going to yell at you to make a quick response, seeing as my PO called me this morning and told me he needs to see me 8:15 friday morning... Im pretty worried right now, if he gives me a drug test, and I fail (I will if i was tested right now), will i be sent to jail?

Ither way, I want to avoid at all possible costs failing any drug tests for them. I will not pass if i take it. As I said im a heavy smoker for a good 6 months now. I have been going a lot lighter sense I got arrested, but I dont think thats going to change the outcome what so ever.

I know drinking crazy ammounts of water does NOTHING, up until the morning of the drug tests (I read a few of your comments... and by a few I mean alot). So when I wake up, ill pee, drink a bottle or 3 of water, pee 3 more times, and then save my next one for the cup... I know I should buy some at home drug tests if im this worried about it, and test it out, but I need some other suggestions to hopefully clarify my system. At this point ill drink bleach (yes, I know, you said it dosent do squat; just showing im desperate) to stay out of jail for years.


Thanks again!

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Originally Posted by mjo890

I've officially been on probation sense June 30th,

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Do you mean May 30th?

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Originally Posted by mjo890

I was told your allowed to fail your first drug test? If thats true, im alittle relieved, but if theres any way I can refrain from doing this, it would look a lot better to my judge.

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Most of the time but it depends. They realize some people are going to smoke up until the day they start probation and/ or they might have stopped but will take some time to get clean. In most cases when someone fails the first test, the second test better show a much lower level to show that you have stopped.

You should read the dilution thread by IAMN2POT at the top of the forum. There are lots of little tricks like water is not the preferred liquid. Check it out and let me know if you need more help.

How long is probation? Good luck too.

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Do you mean May 30th?

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Yes, I did mean May 30th :-)

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Most of the time but it depends. They realize some people are going to smoke up until the day they start probation and/ or they might have stopped but will take some time to get clean. In most cases when someone fails the first test, the second test better show a much lower level to show that you have stopped.

You should read the dilution thread by IAMN2POT at the top of the forum. There are lots of little tricks like water is not the preferred liquid. Check it out and let me know if you need more help.

How long is probation? Good luck too.

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Oh yeah I forgot about the method IAMN2POT posted that ive read before. Is this a reliable way? Because I just had my drug test this morning, and I followed it word for word.

I got my creatine in 4 and 2 days before the test; 7 capsules. I took the advil, drank mad cranberry juice hours before the test, and took the Vitamin B an hour before the test. I dont know if this helps at all, but I deffinitly pissed out Vitamin yellow, and I only got like 2 centimeters in the bottle. Not to brag or anything, but I just couldnt pee with the guy staring at my junk through mirrors. I had to pee MAD bad too!

Anyways, I dont know when, but I guess I should be informed soon as to weather I passed or failed. If I passed then im going to expand my smoking limitations on probation, and thats where you come in FakeBoobsRule :-)

Ill let you know ASAP as to weather i passed or not...